SuperCorp recently moved its headquarters to Corporateville. The recent surge in the number of homeowners in Corporateville proves that Corporateville is a superior place to live than Middlesburg, the home of SuperCorp's original headquarters. Moreover, Middlesburg is a predominately urban area and according to an employee survey, SuperCorp has determined that its workers prefer to live in an area that is not urban. Finally, Corporateville has lower taxes than Middlesburg, making it not only a safer place to work but also a cheaper one. Therefore, Supercorp clearly made the best decision.
The argument made several flawed assumptions. They used data which does not support the idea that SuperCorp made the best decision by moving their headquarters from Middlesburgh to Corporateville.
One of the assumptions is that an increase in number of homeowners in Corporateville makes it a better place to live compared to Middlesburg. First of all, the word better is subjective. What metrics were used to define what better is? And better for who? The executives or the employees. The increase in homeowners will not be better for the employees as this will increase the demand for homes. This in turn, will increase the price to purchase them. Perhaps if more data was provided as to how the company will alleviate the pain of having to pay for a high price for a house, then the argument would be stronger.
The second assumption is that there is a survey indicating workers prefer to live in an area that is not urban. This may very well be the case, but there is no information as to what was specifically asked. Or data showing us reasons why employees dislike the urban environment. Perhaps, if data was shown showing most employees have children and there are more advantages for them if they lived in smaller town then the argument would improve.
Finally, the assumption that lower taxes imposed by the city of Corporateville lead to a safer place to work is flawed. If the city does not tax an appropriate amount, then it wouldn't be crazy to think they won't invest as much in security as the city of Middlesburg. If we were given more information of the type of business
SuperCorp is in, we may find there is less applicable regulations in the new town, therefore making internal security policies at SuperCorp less of a priority. This would not enhance SuperCorp's argument.
Based on the argument's provided by SuperCorp, the notion they made the best decision by moving their headquarters is flawed.
Comments
Essay evaluation report
argument 1 -- OK
argument 2 -- not OK. This survey is only about workers where to live, not about where to work.
argument 3 -- OK
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Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 3.5 out of 6
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 19 15
No. of Words: 332 350
No. of Characters: 1559 1500
No. of Different Words: 162 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.269 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.696 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.753 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 97 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 75 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 59 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 37 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 17.474 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 9.805 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.421 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.28 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.506 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.127 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 3, column 252, Rule ID: IN_WHO[1]
Message: Did you mean 'whom'?
Suggestion: whom
...o define what better is? And better for who? The executives or the employees. The i...
^^^
Line 7, column 177, Rule ID: EN_CONTRACTION_SPELLING
Message: Possible spelling mistake found
Suggestion: wouldn't
... not tax an appropriate amount, then it wouldnt be crazy to think they wont invest as m...
^^^^^^^
Line 7, column 325, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...more information of the type of business SuperCorp is in, we may find there is le...
^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
but, finally, first, if, may, second, so, then, therefore, well, as to, first of all
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 21.0 19.6327345309 107% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 9.0 12.9520958084 69% => OK
Conjunction : 5.0 11.1786427146 45% => More conjunction wanted.
Relative clauses : 7.0 13.6137724551 51% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 22.0 28.8173652695 76% => OK
Preposition: 37.0 55.5748502994 67% => OK
Nominalization: 10.0 16.3942115768 61% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1601.0 2260.96107784 71% => OK
No of words: 330.0 441.139720559 75% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 4.85151515152 5.12650576532 95% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.26214759535 4.56307096286 93% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.82059362423 2.78398813304 101% => OK
Unique words: 167.0 204.123752495 82% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.506060606061 0.468620217663 108% => OK
syllable_count: 504.9 705.55239521 72% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.59920159681 94% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 5.0 4.96107784431 101% => OK
Article: 7.0 8.76447105788 80% => OK
Subordination: 3.0 2.70958083832 111% => OK
Conjunction: 3.0 1.67365269461 179% => OK
Preposition: 0.0 4.22255489022 0% => More preposition wanted as sentence beginning.
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 19.0 19.7664670659 96% => OK
Sentence length: 17.0 22.8473053892 74% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively short.
Sentence length SD: 54.2698704307 57.8364921388 94% => OK
Chars per sentence: 84.2631578947 119.503703932 71% => OK
Words per sentence: 17.3684210526 23.324526521 74% => OK
Discourse Markers: 4.42105263158 5.70786347227 77% => OK
Paragraphs: 6.0 5.15768463074 116% => OK
Language errors: 3.0 5.25449101796 57% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 13.0 8.20758483034 158% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 4.0 6.88822355289 58% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 2.0 4.67664670659 43% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.143687631543 0.218282227539 66% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0422869299812 0.0743258471296 57% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0594098554536 0.0701772020484 85% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.0797948971507 0.128457276422 62% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0327831336359 0.0628817314937 52% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 10.1 14.3799401198 70% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 62.68 48.3550499002 130% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 7.1628742515 43% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 8.7 12.197005988 71% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 10.55 12.5979740519 84% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.92 8.32208582834 95% => OK
difficult_words: 72.0 98.500998004 73% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 5.5 12.3882235529 44% => Linsear_write_formula is low.
gunning_fog: 8.8 11.1389221557 79% => OK
text_standard: 9.0 11.9071856287 76% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Rates: 50.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.