The author argues that the more healtier condition of the workers in the small town of Leeville than the ones in the large city of Masonton due to the more comforatble and slower pace of life in Leeville, which is aslo concluded by the Leeville Chamber of Commerce. In that the people working in the Leeville suffered fewer stress-related disease as well as took fewer sick days off than the employees in Mansonton city. However, we need to collect more evidence about the working condition, environments and the life pressure of these two places in order to prove this conclusion. As I am concern, there are some loopholes in this statement, we need to evaluate them carefully.
To begin with, we need to figure out what does these two groups of people do at work. In that there are many reasons for people asking for sick days. Firstly, perhaps the workers in the Mansonton have to operate some dangerous machines which may hurt them if they do not take attentions on the working enough, it is highly possible because of the work.They would have to take few days to recover. Secondly, the workers in the samll town may be invovled with some jobs which already demanded the clean environment like the fodd factories which produced yogurt or beef. So they may work at a clean environment while have high working pressure. In all, as we are not aware of the working conditions of the two places, it is not comparable of the workers conditions.
In addition, the numbers of people suffered stress-related disease in both of the two places were not accurate because of the different scales of workers. Given that there were less workers in the small town, we do not know the precise ratio of the people who suffered the disease to the one did not, thus it is meaningless to compare the number of patients in Leeville with that in Masonton. Moreover, there are various causes of the psychologic disease besides the work. As the lifestyle of people could incurr the disease, either, like smoking or dringking alchohol.
Finally, whether the workers in Leeville who suffered less illness benefiting from the relaxed pace of life there,according to the local organization, is still in question. Because there is no clear connection between the life pace and the workers' healthier conditions. Also, we could not figure out why did the local organization concluded this idea, or in other words what did they want.Maybe they would like to recuit more workers to develop local economy while the comparison between the bigger city was not compelling.
In conclusion, the author's assumption is not convicing as there is no strong evidence to prove the views of the author. To make it more compelling, the author should take more survey of the two places. Firstly, the main cause of the sick day leave of the two places. Secondly, the main reason of the stress-related illness. Thirdly, what is the intend of the Leeville Chambe of Commerce to make such conclusion.
Essay evaluation report
Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 3.0 out of 6
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 22 15
No. of Words: 510 350
No. of Characters: 2391 1500
No. of Different Words: 217 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.752 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.688 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.498 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 163 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 127 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 78 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 43 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 23.182 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 11.758 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.682 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.316 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.534 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.188 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 3, column 33, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...lly. To begin with, we need to figure out what does these two groups of people...
^^
Line 3, column 354, Rule ID: SENTENCE_WHITESPACE
Message: Add a space between sentences
Suggestion: They
... is highly possible because of the work.They would have to take few days to recover....
^^^^
Line 5, column 178, Rule ID: FEWER_LESS[2]
Message: Did you mean 'fewer'? The noun workers is countable.
Suggestion: fewer
...cales of workers. Given that there were less workers in the small town, we do not kn...
^^^^
Line 7, column 114, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma
Suggestion: , according
...ting from the relaxed pace of life there,according to the local organization, is still in ...
^^^^^^^^^^
Line 7, column 332, Rule ID: DID_PAST[1]
Message: Did you mean 'conclude'?
Suggestion: conclude
...gure out why did the local organization concluded this idea, or in other words what did t...
^^^^^^^^^
Line 7, column 390, Rule ID: SENTENCE_WHITESPACE
Message: Add a space between sentences
Suggestion: Maybe
...a, or in other words what did they want.Maybe they would like to recuit more workers ...
^^^^^
Line 9, column 20, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[1]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'authors'' or 'author's'?
Suggestion: authors'; author's
...s not compelling. In conclusion, the authors assumption is not convicing as there is...
^^^^^^^
Line 9, column 342, Rule ID: A_INFINITVE[1]
Message: Probably a wrong construction: a/the + infinitive
...tress-related illness. Thirdly, what is the intend of the Leeville Chambe of Commerce to m...
^^^^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, besides, finally, first, firstly, however, if, may, moreover, second, secondly, so, still, third, thirdly, thus, well, while, as to, in addition, in conclusion, as well as, in other words, to begin with
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 17.0 19.6327345309 87% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 11.0 12.9520958084 85% => OK
Conjunction : 6.0 11.1786427146 54% => More conjunction wanted.
Relative clauses : 11.0 13.6137724551 81% => OK
Pronoun: 28.0 28.8173652695 97% => OK
Preposition: 83.0 55.5748502994 149% => OK
Nominalization: 13.0 16.3942115768 79% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2459.0 2260.96107784 109% => OK
No of words: 507.0 441.139720559 115% => OK
Chars per words: 4.85009861933 5.12650576532 95% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.74517233601 4.56307096286 104% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.65452313629 2.78398813304 95% => OK
Unique words: 232.0 204.123752495 114% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.457593688363 0.468620217663 98% => OK
syllable_count: 770.4 705.55239521 109% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.59920159681 94% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 8.0 4.96107784431 161% => OK
Article: 7.0 8.76447105788 80% => OK
Subordination: 4.0 2.70958083832 148% => OK
Conjunction: 1.0 1.67365269461 60% => OK
Preposition: 9.0 4.22255489022 213% => Less preposition wanted as sentence beginnings.
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 22.0 19.7664670659 111% => OK
Sentence length: 23.0 22.8473053892 101% => OK
Sentence length SD: 65.1979344854 57.8364921388 113% => OK
Chars per sentence: 111.772727273 119.503703932 94% => OK
Words per sentence: 23.0454545455 23.324526521 99% => OK
Discourse Markers: 9.45454545455 5.70786347227 166% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 8.0 5.25449101796 152% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 8.0 8.20758483034 97% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 10.0 6.88822355289 145% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 4.0 4.67664670659 86% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.235291291294 0.218282227539 108% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0634769299215 0.0743258471296 85% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0714741254772 0.0701772020484 102% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.130161441186 0.128457276422 101% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0696478989833 0.0628817314937 111% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 12.9 14.3799401198 90% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 56.59 48.3550499002 117% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 7.1628742515 43% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 11.1 12.197005988 91% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 11.15 12.5979740519 89% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.23 8.32208582834 99% => OK
difficult_words: 111.0 98.500998004 113% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 18.0 12.3882235529 145% => OK
gunning_fog: 11.2 11.1389221557 101% => OK
text_standard: 12.0 11.9071856287 101% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Rates: 58.33 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.5 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.