Our society is in a race, those race they even do not know where they will reached or their final destination. Unhealthy competition and building the bitterness between people never give a fruitful result and always harm a society in a longer term. So, I strongly support the idea that our society should start to teach our younger children about working in a group, helping each other when needed. Moreover, it is necessary to prepare them leading in different sectors like ruling a country, industry or other fields is only possible by doing work in a cooperative feeling but not competitive. I will explore my opinion by giving three example in the following essay.
First, Nowadays, market is so competative and people only believe on competition. Parents everyday compare their children with other children and they knowingly and unknowlingly trying to build a competative nature in their children. The Most saddest part is, trying to become tough and strong in desire field make children less sensitive and lacking humanity. As a result, younger children do not know how to help others or how to ask help from others. They only know one thing that is, if they ask help with others they will be taken as a useless.
Second, it is very mendatory to teach younger children in home and school about doing work in group, helping each other and moral values and ethics. If school start teach student about always try to be a good human and resposible people of the nation rather than neglecting others issues and trying to move alone with the hope of achieving goal faster than others. For example, if we show them the successfull leaders and business stories who always beleive on group work, sharing knowledge and enthusiastic to learn new things even from the inferior one. Those attitudes only help to kiss the success.
Third, society is the major responsible factor to guide a young children. They have true reflection towards them. If parents and relatives always pressurize children to be a successfull one rather than good human, it will always harm for all. Those success oriented children never understand a problem of miniority group of people or even he cannot be able to lead any project or position. He does not have those qualities like learning from other stories, prioritizing the problems of needy one, thinking and dealing the issues sometimes going beyond the comfortzone would not be possible from those children.
In conclusion, I strongly support the vision that society should have to teach younger people being helpful, cooperative and good human rather than only focusing on sucess and competition. Unhealthy competition will never lead you anywhere in career.
- TPO-49 - Integrated Writing Task Like many creatures, humpback whales migrate long distances for feeding and mating purposes. How animals manage to migrate long distances is often puzzling. In the case of humpback whales, we may have found the answer: the73
- TPO-49 - Integrated Writing Task Like many creatures, humpback whales migrate long distances for feeding and mating purposes. How animals manage to migrate long distances is often puzzling. In the case of humpback whales, we may have found the answer: the71
- An international development organization, in response to a vitamin A deficiency among people in the impoverished nation of Tagus, has engineered a new breed of millet high in vitamin A. While seeds for this new type of millet cost more, farmers will be p30
- TPO-46 - Independent Writing Task Do you agree or disagree with the following statement?The opinions of celebrities, such as famous entertainers and athletes, are more important to younger people than they are to older people.Use specific reasons and exam73
- Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? People learn things better from those at their own level—such as fellow students or co-workers—than from those at a higher level, such as teachers or supervisors. Use specific reasons and examples70
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 76, Rule ID: DID_BASEFORM
Message: The verb 'will' requires the base form of the verb: 'reach'
...e they even do not know where they will reached or their final destination. Unhealthy c...
Line 3, column 91, Rule ID: EVERYDAY_EVERY_DAY
Message: 'Everyday' is an adjective. Did you mean 'every day'?
Suggestion: every day
...le only believe on competition. Parents everyday compare their children with other child...
Line 3, column 239, Rule ID: MOST_SUPERLATIVE
Message: Use only 'saddest' (without 'Most') when you use the superlative.
...mpetative nature in their children. The Most saddest part is, trying to become tough and str...
Line 3, column 540, Rule ID: DT_JJ_NO_NOUN
Message: Probably a noun is missing in this part of the sentence.
... help with others they will be taken as a useless. Second, it is very mendatory to tea...
Line 7, column 65, Rule ID: A_PLURAL
Message: Don't use indefinite articles with plural words. Did you mean 'child'?
...jor responsible factor to guide a young children. They have true reflection towards th...
Line 7, column 84, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
...tor to guide a young children. They have true reflection towards them. If parent...
Line 7, column 101, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
...ung children. They have true reflection towards them. If parents and relatives a...
Line 7, column 246, Rule ID: THIS_NNS
Message: Did you mean 'this success' or 'Those successes'?
Suggestion: This success; Those successes
...ood human, it will always harm for all. Those success oriented children never understand a pr...
Transition Words or Phrases used:
but, first, if, moreover, second, so, third, thus, for example, in conclusion, as a result
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 14.0 19.5258426966 72% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 9.0 12.4196629213 72% => OK
Conjunction : 24.0 14.8657303371 161% => OK
Relative clauses : 6.0 11.3162921348 53% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 35.0 33.0505617978 106% => OK
Preposition: 51.0 58.6224719101 87% => OK
Nominalization: 7.0 12.9106741573 54% => More nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2250.0 2235.4752809 101% => OK
No of words: 448.0 442.535393258 101% => OK
Chars per words: 5.02232142857 5.05705443957 99% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.60065326758 4.55969084622 101% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.56433483339 2.79657885939 92% => OK
Unique words: 231.0 215.323595506 107% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.515625 0.4932671777 105% => OK
syllable_count: 684.9 704.065955056 97% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.59117977528 94% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 13.0 6.24550561798 208% => Less pronouns wanted as sentence beginning.
Article: 1.0 4.99550561798 20% => OK
Subordination: 5.0 3.10617977528 161% => OK
Conjunction: 0.0 1.77640449438 0% => OK
Preposition: 1.0 4.38483146067 23% => More preposition wanted as sentence beginning.
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 21.0 20.2370786517 104% => OK
Sentence length: 21.0 23.0359550562 91% => OK
Sentence length SD: 53.2155587362 60.3974514979 88% => OK
Chars per sentence: 107.142857143 118.986275619 90% => OK
Words per sentence: 21.3333333333 23.4991977007 91% => OK
Discourse Markers: 4.28571428571 5.21951772744 82% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 4.97078651685 101% => OK
Language errors: 8.0 7.80617977528 102% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 14.0 10.2758426966 136% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 5.0 5.13820224719 97% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 2.0 4.83258426966 41% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.101249412228 0.243740707755 42% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0344014270148 0.0831039109588 41% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0240809314252 0.0758088955206 32% => Sentences are similar to each other.
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.0633855626072 0.150359130593 42% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0140774393689 0.0667264976115 21% => Paragraphs are similar to each other. Some content may get duplicated or it is not exactly right on the topic.
automated_readability_index: 12.9 14.1392134831 91% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 58.62 48.8420337079 120% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.92365168539 111% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 10.3 12.1743820225 85% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 11.84 12.1639044944 97% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.1 8.38706741573 97% => OK
difficult_words: 97.0 100.480337079 97% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 14.0 11.8971910112 118% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.4 11.2143820225 93% => OK
text_standard: 10.0 11.7820224719 85% => OK
What are above readability scores?
Rates: 50.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.0 Out of 6
Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.