The best way for a society to prepare its young people for leadership in government, industry, or other fields is by instilling in them a sense of cooperation, not competition.
Write a response in which you discuss the extent to which you agree or disagree with the claim. In developing and supporting your position, be sure to address the most compelling reasons and/or examples that could be used to challenge your position.
In an information modern era, everywhere is filled with all sorts of peer pressure and comparison. From the clothes we wear to the job we have, from the sports team we join to the class we attend, people have become increasingly frequent to compare our lives with other so-called 'perfect examples', those gifted talents who are better than us in one way or another. Under such background, one can hardly avoid competition to flourish as a leader. Nevertheless, the prompt suggests the youth should be imbued with cooperation spirits, rather than competition spirits, to outstand as a successful leader in all industries. I tend to disagree with the prompt, arguing cultivating a competitive mindset is at least of equal significance to nurturing a cooperative mindset. The following lists three reasons to support my argument.
Firstly, leaders need a sense of aggressiveness in order to motivate other team members for achievements. If a leader does not have a competitive mind, how could he or she engage fully to lead the whole team for achieving goals? A hypothetical team leader can be collaborative but failed to lead the team to success. The leader may care for other people's feelings too much in a sense that he or she forgets what are the piorities for a team.
Secondly, people faces greater challenges when facing competition, comparing to being in a collaborative context. Research has shown babies and toddlers without any special guidance naturally exhibit bebaviors that promotes cooperation. This is because learning through day-to-day observation and imitation, most of the young people can learn cooperation. On the other hand, compete positively with other people is an ability that should be taught.
Last but not least, learning how to compete is not a bad thing, instead, compete is. It is not controversal to being a leader with both a cooperative mindset and a competitive mindset.
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 3, column 173, Rule ID: HE_VERB_AGR[1]
Message: The pronoun 'she' must be used with a third-person verb: 'engages'.
Suggestion: engages
...a competitive mind, how could he or she engage fully to lead the whole team for achiev...
^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
but, first, firstly, if, may, nevertheless, second, secondly, so, at least, on the other hand
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 14.0 19.5258426966 72% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 8.0 12.4196629213 64% => OK
Conjunction : 9.0 14.8657303371 61% => OK
Relative clauses : 5.0 11.3162921348 44% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 18.0 33.0505617978 54% => OK
Preposition: 39.0 58.6224719101 67% => OK
Nominalization: 12.0 12.9106741573 93% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1607.0 2235.4752809 72% => OK
No of words: 311.0 442.535393258 70% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 5.16720257235 5.05705443957 102% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.19942759058 4.55969084622 92% => OK
Word Length SD: 3.01327865012 2.79657885939 108% => OK
Unique words: 189.0 215.323595506 88% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.607717041801 0.4932671777 123% => OK
syllable_count: 494.1 704.065955056 70% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.59117977528 101% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 4.0 6.24550561798 64% => OK
Article: 4.0 4.99550561798 80% => OK
Subordination: 1.0 3.10617977528 32% => OK
Conjunction: 0.0 1.77640449438 0% => OK
Preposition: 6.0 4.38483146067 137% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 16.0 20.2370786517 79% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 19.0 23.0359550562 82% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively short.
Sentence length SD: 46.4056502486 60.3974514979 77% => OK
Chars per sentence: 100.4375 118.986275619 84% => OK
Words per sentence: 19.4375 23.4991977007 83% => OK
Discourse Markers: 5.8125 5.21951772744 111% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.97078651685 80% => OK
Language errors: 1.0 7.80617977528 13% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 12.0 10.2758426966 117% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 3.0 5.13820224719 58% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 1.0 4.83258426966 21% => More facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.132968858097 0.243740707755 55% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0432969476169 0.0831039109588 52% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0430088404216 0.0758088955206 57% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.0738090284699 0.150359130593 49% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0329772525671 0.0667264976115 49% => Paragraphs are similar to each other. Some content may get duplicated or it is not exactly right on the topic.
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 12.6 14.1392134831 89% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 52.19 48.8420337079 107% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.92365168539 111% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 10.7 12.1743820225 88% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 12.71 12.1639044944 104% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.74 8.38706741573 104% => OK
difficult_words: 82.0 100.480337079 82% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 14.5 11.8971910112 122% => OK
gunning_fog: 9.6 11.2143820225 86% => OK
text_standard: 13.0 11.7820224719 110% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Better to have 5/6 paragraphs with 3/4 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: reason 4. address both of the views presented for reason 4 (optional)
para 6: conclusion.
Rates: 50.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.