"The best way for a society to prepare its young people for leadership in government, industry, or other fields is by instilling in them a sense of cooperation, not competition."
Write a response in which you discuss the extent to which you agree or disagree with the claim. In developing and supporting your position, be sure to address the most compelling reasons and/or examples that could be used to challenge your position.
The statement here depicts a comparision between competition and cooperation in the sense of preparing the youth for leader roles in a specific domain with giving full weightage on sense of cooperation as the key to achieve success . Though, I would respectfully disagree with the author of this passage. What I feel is, a sense of competition is something which drives a person to reach the ultimate goal. If a person is not competitive enough then it simply indicates he will surrender to tough situation in the near future if given charge of any situation. There are many real instances around us in the world of technology,politics and sports which shows that competition is the ladder to success in creating leaders.
Firstly, if there is no competition amongst individuals the motivation to produce something new just vanishes. A good leader is someone who produces effective result along with something new and innovative . For example, if we consider the young talents of indian cricket, we can derieve many such instances where competition led to the success of a particular leader. 'Mahendra Singh Dhoni' the former captain of the Indian cricket team had to struggle a lot in his initial days to find a position in the team as there is a lot of competition amongst new goons. He learnt a lot from his competition and grew skills just by observing and proved to be a good leader . He is known as 'Captain Cool' just because he knows how to handle tough situations and come as a winner. So I believe competitiveness prepeares you for the worst.
Next I would like to present the case of university admissions. There is a big fight for top university admission because of the high level of applicants applying to the university. The university never chooses all the applicants.So the competion starts from the early stages of the process of becoming a leader. There is a huge competition to get into your desirable university. So this competition helps in the realization of any individual that how well should he prepare himself for the future to become successful.
Last but not the least, the young college graduates who have this idea in mind of a brilliant startup have to struggle a lot because there is a possibility that someone from another university has the same idea and is already working on it . So both the parties have to work hard and find something innovative to become a successful startup. A live example which supports the above claim is the competition between two food delivery applications 'Swiggy' and 'Zomato' in India. Both these startups were started by young minds and are really successful today because of the competition amongst themselves.
Though , cooperation with the organization is really neccessary but leader of any organization is only one. So i would stick to my point that competition is the key in making effective and not feckless leaders.
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 232, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Don't put a space before the full stop
Suggestion: .
...ooperation as the key to achieve success . Though, I would respectfully disagree w...
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Line 1, column 235, Rule ID: SENTENCE_FRAGMENT[1]
Message: “Though” at the beginning of a sentence requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
...eration as the key to achieve success . Though, I would respectfully disagree with the...
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Suggestion: , politics
...ces around us in the world of technology,politics and sports which shows that competition...
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Suggestion: .
... along with something new and innovative . For example, if we consider the young t...
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...ns. He learnt a lot from his competition and grew skills just by observing and pr...
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Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
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...grew skills just by observing and proved to be a good leader . He is known as Cap...
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Line 3, column 665, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
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Suggestion: .
...bserving and proved to be a good leader . He is known as Captain Cool just becaus...
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...ust because he knows how to handle tough situations and come as a winner. So I be...
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...Next I would like to present the case of university admissions. There is a big fi...
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Suggestion: So
...ersity never chooses all the applicants.So the competion starts from the early sta...
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Suggestion: .
...e same idea and is already working on it . So both the parties have to work hard a...
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...mpetition amongst themselves. Though , cooperation with the organization is re...
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Message: Did you mean 'I'?
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...der of any organization is only one. So i would stick to my point that competitio...
^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
but, first, firstly, if, really, so, then, well, for example, i feel
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 20.0 19.5258426966 102% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 6.0 12.4196629213 48% => OK
Conjunction : 13.0 14.8657303371 87% => OK
Relative clauses : 10.0 11.3162921348 88% => OK
Pronoun: 30.0 33.0505617978 91% => OK
Preposition: 66.0 58.6224719101 113% => OK
Nominalization: 24.0 12.9106741573 186% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2404.0 2235.4752809 108% => OK
No of words: 487.0 442.535393258 110% => OK
Chars per words: 4.9363449692 5.05705443957 98% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.69766713281 4.55969084622 103% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.96300475602 2.79657885939 106% => OK
Unique words: 246.0 215.323595506 114% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.505133470226 0.4932671777 102% => OK
syllable_count: 771.3 704.065955056 110% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.59117977528 101% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 4.0 6.24550561798 64% => OK
Article: 6.0 4.99550561798 120% => OK
Subordination: 3.0 3.10617977528 97% => OK
Conjunction: 0.0 1.77640449438 0% => OK
Preposition: 0.0 4.38483146067 0% => More preposition wanted as sentence beginning.
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 23.0 20.2370786517 114% => OK
Sentence length: 21.0 23.0359550562 91% => OK
Sentence length SD: 47.5236683645 60.3974514979 79% => OK
Chars per sentence: 104.52173913 118.986275619 88% => OK
Words per sentence: 21.1739130435 23.4991977007 90% => OK
Discourse Markers: 2.95652173913 5.21951772744 57% => More transition words/phrases wanted.
Paragraphs: 5.0 4.97078651685 101% => OK
Language errors: 13.0 7.80617977528 167% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 17.0 10.2758426966 165% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 4.0 5.13820224719 78% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 2.0 4.83258426966 41% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.161672260361 0.243740707755 66% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0466136801876 0.0831039109588 56% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0490020254749 0.0758088955206 65% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.0844950030184 0.150359130593 56% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0458816215755 0.0667264976115 69% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 12.4 14.1392134831 88% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 50.16 48.8420337079 103% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.92365168539 111% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 11.5 12.1743820225 94% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 11.37 12.1639044944 93% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.79 8.38706741573 93% => OK
difficult_words: 96.0 100.480337079 96% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 11.5 11.8971910112 97% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.4 11.2143820225 93% => OK
text_standard: 12.0 11.7820224719 102% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Rates: 50.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.