Claim: Even though young people often receive the advice to “follow your dreams,” more emphasis should be placed on picking worthy goals. Reason: Many people’s dreams are inherently selfishWrite a response in which you discuss the extent to which you ag

I agree partially with the claim made here, to be precise I agree with the first part of the statement but agree partially with the second statement as there the term " worthy" is subjective . And in some cases ,people may not view their dreams as selfish.

No doubt about the good intentions of the statement above, I would have agreed completely if the second part of the sentence were stated to place more emphasis on picking worthy goals that are not detrimental to the world peace and stability.

From the earliest period of mankind, majority of the human have followed their dreams in most of the cases and thus triggered a chain of development that were to come in the years to follow. If that were not the case, I wouldn't have had the privilege to type this essay on this computer. So it is certainly a good advice when one says to follow our own dreams. Because if not, one cannot harness his true potential. For example, if a boy wishes to pursue higher studies in Physics, but due to family pressure has to study engineering instead, it will only drive to fuel the parents' satisfaction, while the student himself cannot make the best use of his potential. And in that way, he is answerable to no on but himself for his future course of action.So one should definitely follow one's own dreams.

There are many who dream of becoming doctors, scientists, engineers, to name a few, in the hopes of contributing to make the world a better place to live. So the whole idea of following one's dream is welcome. But problem starts to show if that dream is detrimental to the larger interests of the world.

To expand upon the previous point made, Lets take the example of Hitler. That time, Germany reeling from the humiliation and economic burden following the 1st World war, was actually seething and looking for a way to strike back. Hitler rose to occasion to avenge Germany's defeat and humiliation. And the rest is history, albeit one which had a negative impact on the world. We came to know of the horrible camps and the HOLOCAUST. The point to be noted is that Hitler was not selfish if decided on a personal scale, he simply wanted to restore the former glory of Germany so much in the process, he resorted to evil and malicious schemes to achieve that.

Another example from the recent times should be ISIS, whose target is to establish a worldwide Caliphate as indoctrinated by Prophet Muhammad. But one may argue they are only following the doctrines. So it is not a case of selfishness for personal gain either.

The main point is to realise for oneself what is good and what is bad for the world at large, and one should only place emphasis on the goals that do not destroy the stab

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Sentence: The main point is to realise for oneself what is good and what is bad for the world at large, and one should only place emphasis on the goals that do not destroy the stab
Error: realise Suggestion: realize

flaws:
Need to discuss more about the reason. 'Reason: Many people’s dreams are inherently selfish'. and the relation between the Reason and Claim.

Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 3.5 out of 6
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 1 2
No. of Sentences: 22 15
No. of Words: 487 350
No. of Characters: 2161 1500
No. of Different Words: 253 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.698 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.437 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.382 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 142 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 94 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 59 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 39 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 22.136 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 11.522 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.682 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.261 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.548 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.066 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 7 5