College students should be encouraged to pursue subjects that interest them rather than the courses that seem most likely to lead to jobs.
Write a response in which you discuss the extent to which you agree or disagree with the recommendation and explain your reasoning for the position you take. In developing and supporting your position, describe specific circumstances in which adopting the recommendation would or would not be advantageous and explain how these examples shape your position.
When I was a middle school student, I never really thought why I should attend college and what I was to study in college. I was just tunneled into a college-oriented curriculum track with other well-performing students. As a result, I didn’t really start to figure out my study plan until I got into a college, and I did so amid a variety of voices of whether I should focus my study on the subjects that really interested me or I should focus on the so-called “useful” subjects that has a prospect to lead me to a stable career. Looking backward, I would argue that it is surely important for every student to think through what field they are going to dedicate themselves to make a living; however, the priority is to find the very field that would give a student the kind of passion to do so, not to find a field that would be lucrative enough to induce students to jump in even though they have no passion for it at all.
First and foremost, student should pursue the subjects that could really kindle their passion not because of “interest for interest’s sake,” but because one’s interest actually indicates one’s calling. The main purpose of college education is not for the gaining of each student’s personal income, but for the public good of society as a whole. Whenever one student finds their calling during the learning process of a certain subject, this is the very precious moment that set student free on the track of devoting themselves to the public good. College education should empower students to pursue their passion as well as encourage them to utilize what they have learned to benefit the world. By so doing, each and every year, the college would be able to send into society an army of talented and passionate specialists from various backgrounds, and together these future leaders would be enthusiastic to come together to solve all kinds of unresolved issues in the world.
Moreover, when students are allowed to concentrate on what truly interests them, this makes it possible for them to combine learnings from different disciplines into an unexpected and yet innovative way. One of the most successful case is Steve Jobs’ experience of learning calligraphy in his drop-out years in college. Steve Jobs dropped out from the college basically to free himself from studying the mandatory courses that were designed by the university authority that they thought would enable students to find a stable job with. However, Steve Jobs did now view these courses at the ones that either interested him or was useful for him. Instead, He dropped out in order to focus on what really kindled his mind, and calligraphy is one of such courses. Eventually, the knowledge from this course rewarded him in a way that he did not expect in those years. Thanks to the calligraphy course, all personal computers we are using now are equipped with multiple sorts of artistic fonts. When students are allowed to follow their hearts, they are allowed to connect the dots through some ingenious routes that are unimaginable for those who are conventional in viewing what subjects are useful for the later career in life and what are not.
In conclusion, I believe that the college education should be reformed in a way to allow students to explore and to pursue their interests instead of following some stifled job-oriented courses which are reckoned as profitable from an uncreative, conventional perspective. By so doing, the society as a whole would see itself be equipped with much more passionate professionals instead of some cold, boring, profit-focusing individualistic individuals. Thanks to many of my professors in my college years, I had the opportunity to focus my study on complicated political issues that really intrigued me, which did not seem (and does not seem even now) profitable at all. Yet through these years of study, I have gradually developed a great deal of rigorous passion in this field, and am determined to equip myself even better on these topics through higher learning in order to dedicated myself to reform the socio-political environment of my own country with others of the same mind. I insist that students should focus on their interests so as to benefit their society in the most profound way, and this is the very way of living I have practiced daily since my college years.
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 7, column 1039, Rule ID: SO_AS_TO
Message: Use simply 'to'
...tudents should focus on their interests so as to benefit their society in the most profo...
Transition Words or Phrases used:
actually, but, first, however, if, look, moreover, really, so, thus, well, as to, in conclusion, kind of, as a result, as well as
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 28.0 19.5258426966 143% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 15.0 12.4196629213 121% => OK
Conjunction : 19.0 14.8657303371 128% => OK
Relative clauses : 21.0 11.3162921348 186% => OK
Pronoun: 84.0 33.0505617978 254% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 118.0 58.6224719101 201% => Less preposition wanted.
Nominalization: 5.0 12.9106741573 39% => More nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 3621.0 2235.4752809 162% => OK
No of words: 737.0 442.535393258 167% => Less content wanted.
Chars per words: 4.9131614654 5.05705443957 97% => OK
Fourth root words length: 5.21034969277 4.55969084622 114% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.7607729402 2.79657885939 99% => OK
Unique words: 335.0 215.323595506 156% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.454545454545 0.4932671777 92% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 1129.5 704.065955056 160% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.59117977528 94% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 12.0 6.24550561798 192% => OK
Article: 5.0 4.99550561798 100% => OK
Subordination: 5.0 3.10617977528 161% => OK
Conjunction: 7.0 1.77640449438 394% => Less conjunction wanted as sentence beginning.
Preposition: 3.0 4.38483146067 68% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 22.0 20.2370786517 109% => OK
Sentence length: 33.0 23.0359550562 143% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively long.
Sentence length SD: 79.5210352128 60.3974514979 132% => OK
Chars per sentence: 164.590909091 118.986275619 138% => OK
Words per sentence: 33.5 23.4991977007 143% => OK
Discourse Markers: 5.86363636364 5.21951772744 112% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.97078651685 80% => OK
Language errors: 1.0 7.80617977528 13% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 19.0 10.2758426966 185% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 0.0 5.13820224719 0% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 3.0 4.83258426966 62% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.198688012458 0.243740707755 82% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0646288075592 0.0831039109588 78% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0438142992091 0.0758088955206 58% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.129413621352 0.150359130593 86% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0229706734439 0.0667264976115 34% => Paragraphs are similar to each other. Some content may get duplicated or it is not exactly right on the topic.
automated_readability_index: 18.4 14.1392134831 130% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 46.44 48.8420337079 95% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.92365168539 111% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 15.0 12.1743820225 123% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 11.79 12.1639044944 97% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.44 8.38706741573 101% => OK
difficult_words: 148.0 100.480337079 147% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 18.0 11.8971910112 151% => OK
gunning_fog: 15.2 11.2143820225 136% => OK
text_standard: 18.0 11.7820224719 153% => OK
What are above readability scores?
Write the essay in 30 minutes.
Better to have 5/6 paragraphs with 3/4 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: reason 4. address both of the views presented for reason 4 (optional)
para 6: conclusion.
Rates: 66.67 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 4.0 Out of 6
Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.