The following is part of a memorandum from the president of Humana University.
"Last year the number of students who enrolled in online degree programs offered by nearby Omni University increased by 50 percent. During the same year, Omni showed a significant decrease from prior years in expenditures for dormitory and classroom space, most likely because instruction in the online programs takes place via the Internet. In contrast, over the past three years, enrollment at Humana University has failed to grow, and the cost of maintaining buildings has increased along with our budget deficit. To address these problems, Humana University will begin immediately to create and actively promote online degree programs like those at Omni. We predict that instituting these online degree programs will help Humana both increase its total enrollment and solve its budget problems."
Write a response in which you discuss what questions would need to be answered in order to decide whether the prediction and the argument on which it is based are reasonable. Be sure to explain how the answers to these questions would help to evaluate the prediction.
In this memorandum written by the president of the Humana University, he talks about promoting online degree programs to increase overall enrollment and solve budget related problems. To strengthen his argument he cites example of nearby Omni University, which has got significant increase in enrollment through online programs and managed to decrease the expenses of classroom budget. He also, talks about the decreased rate of enrollment at Humana and difficulties in maintaining budget for dormitory and classrooms. In my opinion the arguments presented by the president are weak and too quixotic.
Firstly, the president wrongly relates Omni University with Humana. He never mentions the courses provided by both universities. To provide strength to his arguments, he must cite any surveys from acceptable sources. Maybe, the Omni provides totally different courses in degree than that of Humana. Unless and until the overall intake and subjects are provided, we cannot conclude anything.
Secondly, he unconvincingly thinks that increment for a short period is enough to decide. Maybe, the data should be gathered for little extra time period. The success gained by Omni may not last long. Like, some of the students might only have enrolled to check the new method of education.
Thirdly, the president doesn't account the other facilities provided by university. Maybe the increment in the enrollment is the result of better reputation of Omni. For an example, Omni may have hired quality faculties and professors. The management of Omni may have planned better to bring popularity.
Fourthly, the president does not talk about difficulties to setting up the online degree program. Like, Humana will have to set up new systems and architecture for new courses. Maybe, the current teaching staff is not familiar with new style of education. In such cases the program would badly fail.
In sum, I believe that the arguments presented by the president are not only weak but also optimistic. He should first of all gather data on from a larger background. Maybe, the surveys talking about online enrollment over the country or large region can give better idea. Also, immediately moving over to internet based system may not work. First of all, enough planning and set ups should be done. Up to that, the idea presented by the president remains dubious and unacceptable.
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 5, column 209, Rule ID: SOME_OF_THE[1]
Message: Simply use 'some'.
Suggestion: some
...gained by Omni may not last long. Like, some of the students might only have enrolled to ch...
^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 7, column 25, Rule ID: EN_CONTRACTION_SPELLING
Message: Possible spelling mistake found
Suggestion: doesn't
...of education. Thirdly, the president doesnt account the other facilities provided b...
^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, first, firstly, if, may, second, secondly, so, then, third, thirdly, talking about, first of all, in my opinion
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 8.0 19.5258426966 41% => More to be verbs wanted.
Auxiliary verbs: 13.0 12.4196629213 105% => OK
Conjunction : 13.0 14.8657303371 87% => OK
Relative clauses : 5.0 11.3162921348 44% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 17.0 33.0505617978 51% => OK
Preposition: 56.0 58.6224719101 96% => OK
Nominalization: 12.0 12.9106741573 93% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2013.0 2235.4752809 90% => OK
No of words: 379.0 442.535393258 86% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 5.31134564644 5.05705443957 105% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.41224685777 4.55969084622 97% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.75407398677 2.79657885939 98% => OK
Unique words: 211.0 215.323595506 98% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.55672823219 0.4932671777 113% => OK
syllable_count: 631.8 704.065955056 90% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.7 1.59117977528 107% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 8.0 6.24550561798 128% => OK
Article: 10.0 4.99550561798 200% => Less articles wanted as sentence beginning.
Subordination: 1.0 3.10617977528 32% => OK
Conjunction: 0.0 1.77640449438 0% => OK
Preposition: 7.0 4.38483146067 160% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 27.0 20.2370786517 133% => OK
Sentence length: 14.0 23.0359550562 61% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively short.
Sentence length SD: 35.0436921093 60.3974514979 58% => The essay contains lots of sentences with the similar length. More sentence varieties wanted.
Chars per sentence: 74.5555555556 118.986275619 63% => OK
Words per sentence: 14.037037037 23.4991977007 60% => More words per sentence wanted.
Discourse Markers: 4.51851851852 5.21951772744 87% => OK
Paragraphs: 6.0 4.97078651685 121% => OK
Language errors: 2.0 7.80617977528 26% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 11.0 10.2758426966 107% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 4.0 5.13820224719 78% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 12.0 4.83258426966 248% => Less facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.228091872024 0.243740707755 94% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0595728604042 0.0831039109588 72% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0606506151842 0.0758088955206 80% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.112566573448 0.150359130593 75% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0525255824716 0.0667264976115 79% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 10.6 14.1392134831 75% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 48.81 48.8420337079 100% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 7.92365168539 39% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 9.9 12.1743820225 81% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 12.93 12.1639044944 106% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.87 8.38706741573 106% => OK
difficult_words: 109.0 100.480337079 108% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 11.5 11.8971910112 97% => OK
gunning_fog: 7.6 11.2143820225 68% => OK
text_standard: 11.0 11.7820224719 93% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Rates: 54.17 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.25 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.