Governments should invest as much in the arts as they do in the military Write a response in which you discuss the extent to which you agree or disagree with the recommendation and explain your reasoning for the position you take In developing and support | TOEFL IELTS GMAT GRE SAT ACT PTE ESL

Essay topics:

Governments should invest as much in the arts as they do in the military.

Write a response in which you discuss the extent to which you agree or disagree with the recommendation and explain your reasoning for the position you take. In developing and supporting your position, describe specific circumstances in which adopting the recommendation would or would not be advantageous and explain how these examples shape your position.

he given statement states that governments should invest as much in the arts as they do in the military. The given statement is marred by indiscriminate word choice which reduces its efficacy and renders the sentiment expressed superficial. The given statement is opinionated , marginal and subjective in nature which compromises the clarity, potency and invalidates the merit of the sentiment expressed by it.

To begin with use of word arts is polemical as it is a broad term which should be specified in the above statement. Above statement should have specified this word whether it include all types of arts which include artistic building art, writing art , portrait and sculpture art et cetera or just one type of art. Statement should also specified the advantage of investing in arts in the above statement for example, if arts mentioned in above includes all type of arts then it can be a lucrative source for the betterment of economy as various various types of arts such as building a beautiful buildings might attract tourists from all over the world which further improves the economy condition of a country but if it include only one type of art then it would be a foolish decision to invest in one type of art as much as government invest in the military. Therefore, word arts in above statement should be specified.

Additionally, it can be argued that investing in the arts as much as government invest in the military is not a feasible option as investing in the military is necessity of a government for the protection of its people while this is not the case in the arts. Government invest more in the military because its a national security concern as military provides protection to citizen of its country while investing in the arts similar to military is not important as it does not concern the security of a country for example, if a war broke out then the military which is highly equipped and trained would be the one to win while arts do not win the war or protect its citizen from a external attack. Thus, investing in the arts as much as in the military is not a feasible option for a government.

Finally, it can be said that investing in arts as much as in the military would generate massive pressure on the economic budget of country as all country cannot afford to invest in the arts as much as investing in the military. Rather investing hefty amount in the arts same investment can be used in the building better infrastructure, providing better health facilities et cetera. For example a poor country cant afford investing in arts as much as investing in the military.

It can be concluded that by ignoring the factors which are critical for assessment of the statement given above the issue becomes unilateral and subjective in nature. On grounds of pure logic and reason one cannot agree with above statement which suffers a great extent due to use of words that in themselves poorly defined and used in desultory manner.

Votes

Essay Categories

GMAT/GRE Issue Task

Comments

Essay evaluations by e-grader

Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 1, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: He
he given statement states that governments...
^^
Line 1, column 4, Rule ID: PRP_PAST_PART[1]
Message: Possible grammatical error. You used a past participle without using any required verb ('be' or 'have'). Did you mean 'gave'?
Suggestion: gave
he given statement states that governments shoul...
^^^^^
Line 1, column 276, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma, but not before the comma
Suggestion: ,
...cial. The given statement is opinionated , marginal and subjective in nature which...
^^
Line 3, column 250, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma, but not before the comma
Suggestion: ,
...clude artistic building art, writing art , portrait and sculpture art et cetera or...
^^
Line 3, column 337, Rule ID: DID_BASEFORM[1]
Message: The verb 'should' requires the base form of the verb: 'specify'
Suggestion: specify
... one type of art. Statement should also specified the advantage of investing in arts in t...
^^^^^^^^^
Line 3, column 538, Rule ID: ENGLISH_WORD_REPEAT_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a word
Suggestion: various
...source for the betterment of economy as various various types of arts such as building a beauti...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 3, column 722, Rule ID: IT_VBZ[1]
Message: Did you mean 'includes'?
Suggestion: includes
...conomy condition of a country but if it include only one type of art then it would be a...
^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 307, Rule ID: IT_IS[17]
Message: Did you mean 'it's' (='it is') instead of 'its' (possessive pronoun)?
Suggestion: it's; it is
...ent invest more in the military because its a national security concern as military...
^^^
Line 5, column 680, Rule ID: EN_A_VS_AN
Message: Use 'an' instead of 'a' if the following word starts with a vowel sound, e.g. 'an article', 'an hour'
Suggestion: an
...win the war or protect its citizen from a external attack. Thus, investing in the...
^
Line 7, column 230, Rule ID: SENT_START_CONJUNCTIVE_LINKING_ADVERB_COMMA[1]
Message: Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Suggestion: Rather,
...s as much as investing in the military. Rather investing hefty amount in the arts same...
^^^^^^
Line 7, column 412, Rule ID: CANT[1]
Message: Did you mean 'can't' or 'cannot'?
Suggestion: can't; cannot
...s et cetera. For example a poor country cant afford investing in arts as much as in...
^^^^
Line 7, column 423, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
.... For example a poor country cant afford investing in arts as much as investing i...
^^
Line 7, column 425, Rule ID: AFFORD_VBG[1]
Message: This verb is used with infinitive: 'to invest'.
Suggestion: to invest
...For example a poor country cant afford investing in arts as much as investing in the mil...
^^^^^^^^^
Line 9, column 130, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
... statement given above the issue becomes unilateral and subjective in nature. On ...
^^

Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, finally, if, so, then, therefore, thus, while, for example, such as, to begin with

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 20.0 19.5258426966 102% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 16.0 12.4196629213 129% => OK
Conjunction : 11.0 14.8657303371 74% => OK
Relative clauses : 13.0 11.3162921348 115% => OK
Pronoun: 25.0 33.0505617978 76% => OK
Preposition: 73.0 58.6224719101 125% => OK
Nominalization: 23.0 12.9106741573 178% => OK

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2464.0 2235.4752809 110% => OK
No of words: 514.0 442.535393258 116% => OK
Chars per words: 4.79377431907 5.05705443957 95% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.76146701107 4.55969084622 104% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.73337169702 2.79657885939 98% => OK
Unique words: 196.0 215.323595506 91% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.381322957198 0.4932671777 77% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 810.0 704.065955056 115% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.59117977528 101% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 4.0 6.24550561798 64% => OK
Article: 2.0 4.99550561798 40% => OK
Subordination: 2.0 3.10617977528 64% => OK
Conjunction: 0.0 1.77640449438 0% => OK
Preposition: 3.0 4.38483146067 68% => OK

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 15.0 20.2370786517 74% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 34.0 23.0359550562 148% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively long.
Sentence length SD: 128.220019238 60.3974514979 212% => The lengths of sentences changed so frequently.
Chars per sentence: 164.266666667 118.986275619 138% => OK
Words per sentence: 34.2666666667 23.4991977007 146% => OK
Discourse Markers: 6.2 5.21951772744 119% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 4.97078651685 101% => OK
Language errors: 14.0 7.80617977528 179% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 3.0 10.2758426966 29% => More positive sentences wanted.
Sentences with negative sentiment : 6.0 5.13820224719 117% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 6.0 4.83258426966 124% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.255438568877 0.243740707755 105% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.115724947566 0.0831039109588 139% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0488438880096 0.0758088955206 64% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.151414578051 0.150359130593 101% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0268780901061 0.0667264976115 40% => Paragraphs are similar to each other. Some content may get duplicated or it is not exactly right on the topic.

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 18.3 14.1392134831 129% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 36.97 48.8420337079 76% => OK
smog_index: 11.2 7.92365168539 141% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 16.6 12.1743820225 136% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 11.09 12.1639044944 91% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.43 8.38706741573 101% => OK
difficult_words: 101.0 100.480337079 101% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 11.5 11.8971910112 97% => OK
gunning_fog: 15.6 11.2143820225 139% => OK
text_standard: 12.0 11.7820224719 102% => OK
What are above readability scores?

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Rates: 58.33 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.5 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.

Essay evaluations by e-grader

Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, finally, if, so, then, therefore, thus, while, for example, such as, to begin with

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments