The luxuries and conveniences of contemporary life prevent people from developing into truly strong and independent individuals.
Write a response in which you discuss the extent to which you agree or disagree with the statement and explain your reasoning for the position you take. In developing and supporting your position, you should consider ways in which the statement might or might not hold true and explain how these considerations shape your position.
The advancement of technology and science enables people to live comfortably and with much more ease compared to the condition of life centuries ago. These convenience in form of the products of scientific progress may give some negative effects to most of people. On the other hand, the progression of technology opens up many new opportunities for many people that previously can not acquire. Strong and independent individuals can be defined as people who are self-reliant and those who know what they need, and they can fulfill those needs independently. Using recently available amenities have been giving more positive impacts for humans’ growth than the negative impacts that they might inflict to the humans.
The success of most people require resources for learning and developing their skills to increase their chance of persistence in career, and their chance of survival in the growingly competitive world. The information and communication technology provide the access for people to learn many new skills easily and they create more room for nurturing the abilities that are needed in their work or their survival in general. Century ago, people were far away from the source of information; they need to go to the nearest public library, or they can only rely on widely published materials like newspapers for learning and studying. Contrastly, people in this era can easily gain acces to the information they need using the internet. Also, sharing information among many people is also widely available, so people in remote or less developed area also can study and get information as long as there can connect to the internet. This learning opportunity will make people’s life easier, and their chance of survival can increase dramatically. The data that supports this stance is the fact that in a more developed nations, the reliance of one person to other productive people is lower due to lower unemployment rate. The success in the career is the basic way to survive and fulfill the needs, and the more people have the access to the success by learning, the more likely they will live more independently. Unless we take the already old population who can no longer work, the high employment rate can be designated as a parameter of people’s independence in life.
The effect of access toward a broad information and knowledge give people opportunity to learn many basic skills using the same convenient method, the internet. While years ago people will face difficulty to learn how to cook or how to repair their homes, now they can learn it from the internet. Furthermore, using these widely available basic skills can be a chance for the people to have additional income. People who are interested in cooking may learn to improve their cooking skills so they can open culinary business near their homes. When people previously need specialists to repair some appliances at home, now they can repair them using the instructions from the internet. Another convenience that also can help people to sustain their life is the access toward healthcare system. Nowadays, people can contact the doctors easily using online applications, and the ease of communication makes the chance of survival from accidents much higher than before. All the conveniences in form of technology are not a bad things for people’s life, they can learn more and have a more secure life so they can potentially grow.
On the other hand, the technology may cause some negative sides to the people, mainly the laziness of people that can hinder their growth. At the past, people will be more hard working because they need to do so to survive; for example, they must study at the public library that could be far away from their place, and they must commute earlier to their job due to a more backward transportation technology at that time. Now, people can just access everything using the phone, and sometimes it drives people to become lazy or do something unlawful like cheating. Nonetheless, the positive sides compensate this negative probability.
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 151, Rule ID: THIS_NNS[2]
Message: Did you mean 'this convenience' or 'These conveniences'?
Suggestion: This convenience; These conveniences
...to the condition of life centuries ago. These convenience in form of the products of scientific p...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 1, column 250, Rule ID: MOST_SOME_OF_NNS[1]
Message: After 'most of', you should use 'the' ('most of the people') or simply say ''most people''.
Suggestion: most of the people; most people
...gress may give some negative effects to most of people. On the other hand, the progression of ...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 1024, Rule ID: A_PLURAL[2]
Message: Don't use indefinite articles with plural words. Did you mean 'thing'?
Suggestion: thing
...ces in form of technology are not a bad things for people’s life, they can learn more ...
^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, furthermore, if, may, nonetheless, so, while, for example, in general, on the other hand
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 16.0 19.5258426966 82% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 36.0 12.4196629213 290% => Less auxiliary verb wanted.
Conjunction : 24.0 14.8657303371 161% => OK
Relative clauses : 14.0 11.3162921348 124% => OK
Pronoun: 50.0 33.0505617978 151% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 81.0 58.6224719101 138% => OK
Nominalization: 20.0 12.9106741573 155% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 3399.0 2235.4752809 152% => OK
No of words: 668.0 442.535393258 151% => Less content wanted.
Chars per words: 5.08832335329 5.05705443957 101% => OK
Fourth root words length: 5.08386624201 4.55969084622 111% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.72819843686 2.79657885939 98% => OK
Unique words: 293.0 215.323595506 136% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.438622754491 0.4932671777 89% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 1082.7 704.065955056 154% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.59117977528 101% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 5.0 6.24550561798 80% => OK
Article: 13.0 4.99550561798 260% => Less articles wanted as sentence beginning.
Subordination: 3.0 3.10617977528 97% => OK
Conjunction: 8.0 1.77640449438 450% => Less conjunction wanted as sentence beginning.
Preposition: 3.0 4.38483146067 68% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 26.0 20.2370786517 128% => OK
Sentence length: 25.0 23.0359550562 109% => OK
Sentence length SD: 43.377880683 60.3974514979 72% => OK
Chars per sentence: 130.730769231 118.986275619 110% => OK
Words per sentence: 25.6923076923 23.4991977007 109% => OK
Discourse Markers: 3.61538461538 5.21951772744 69% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.97078651685 80% => OK
Language errors: 3.0 7.80617977528 38% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 18.0 10.2758426966 175% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 7.0 5.13820224719 136% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 1.0 4.83258426966 21% => More facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.0947175328991 0.243740707755 39% => The similarity between the topic and the content is low.
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0369294723013 0.0831039109588 44% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0206127145102 0.0758088955206 27% => Sentences are similar to each other.
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.0699496395036 0.150359130593 47% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0170487014788 0.0667264976115 26% => Paragraphs are similar to each other. Some content may get duplicated or it is not exactly right on the topic.
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 15.4 14.1392134831 109% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 46.1 48.8420337079 94% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.92365168539 111% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 13.0 12.1743820225 107% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 12.54 12.1639044944 103% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.37 8.38706741573 100% => OK
difficult_words: 148.0 100.480337079 147% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 12.0 11.8971910112 101% => OK
gunning_fog: 12.0 11.2143820225 107% => OK
text_standard: 13.0 11.7820224719 110% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Write the essay in 30 minutes.
Better to have 5/6 paragraphs with 3/4 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: reason 4. address both of the views presented for reason 4 (optional)
para 6: conclusion.
Rates: 66.67 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 4.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.