A nation should require all of its students to study the same national curriculum until they enter college.
Write a response in which you discuss the extent to which you agree or disagree with the recommendation and explain your reasoning for the position you take. In developing and supporting your position, describe specific circumstances in which adopting the recommendation would or would not be advantageous and explain how those examples shape your position.
It is stated that students should be urged to study the same courses until entering universities. The suggestion may be merit for equal education purpose, however, this policy ignores the situations that not all the younglings are able to be imparted with the same knowledge. To say that students should study the same national curriculum is therefore not recommended.
It is expected that there are some gifted youngsters who have high intelligence quotient or outstanding performance at sports. They need to be cared accordingly in order to maintain and polish their special abilities, otherwise they will be rusted in class and give no contribution to the realms they are good at. The United States’ education system, for example, has already implemented this policy to most of their younglings before enrolling to universities, including scholarships for talented football players, basketball athletes or the participants who have won a prize in the International Mathematical Olympiad, so that they can go to higher education successfully in spite of the circumstances of being poor.
On the other hand, students who suffer mental or physical disorders cannot be imparted with the same curriculum as normal students. They may have certain disabilities, such as blindness or retarded, so that they need additional help to reduce their difficulties in studies. For instance, Albert Einstein was thought to be a retard when he was in elementary school. Without his teachers and parents’ patients and special care, it is unbelievable to imagine that ha became one of the greatest scientists in twentieth centuries. As a result, it is not appropriate to teach the same materials for all students if they are not having the same physical or psychological conditions.
By contrast, if consistent curriculum are provided to all teenagers, negative impacts are consequently generated. Those students with gifted or defected abilities will not have the appropriate training, resulting them to become ordinary, or even cannot graduate from elementary school. Even worse, some of the disabilities join gangsters to sell drugs because of low education and poverty. Therefore, they cannot have positive contribution to the societies.
Owing to the negative impacts by following this suggestions and the promising result by objecting this policy, it is therefore not recommended that all the teenagers should be imparted by the same national courses.
Comments
Essay evaluation report
Sentence: Owing to the negative impacts by following this suggestions and the promising result by objecting this policy, it is therefore not recommended that all the teenagers should be imparted by the same national courses.
Description: A determiner/pronoun, singular is not usually followed by a noun, plural, common
Suggestion: Refer to this and suggestions
Sentence: The suggestion may be merit for equal education purpose, however, this policy ignores the situations that not all the younglings are able to be imparted with the same knowledge.
Error: younglings Suggestion: No alternate word
Sentence: The United States' education system, for example, has already implemented this policy to most of their younglings before enrolling to universities, including scholarships for talented football players, basketball athletes or the participants who have won a prize in the International Mathematical Olympiad, so that they can go to higher education successfully in spite of the circumstances of being poor.
Error: younglings Suggestion: No alternate word
flaws:
The fourth paragraph is duplicated to the second and the third paragraph. You may try this pattern:
paragraph 1: introduction. Suppose we support side A.
paragraph 2: reason 1 + why reason 1 + example of reason 1 + a small conclusion (like advantages of reason 1 or comparisons if not reason 1).
paragraph 3: reason 2 + why reason 2 + example of reason 2 + a small conclusion (like advantages of reason 2 or comparisons if not reason 2).
paragraph 4: Admittedly, there are some advantages of side B. First, ... Second, .... However, there is no causation/relation.... I still support side A. first,....second...
paragraph 5: conclusion -- reinforce the thesis.
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More content wanted. For issue essays, around 450 words, for argument essays, around 400 words.
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Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 3.5 out of 6
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 1 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 2 2
No. of Sentences: 16 15
No. of Words: 380 350
No. of Characters: 2018 1500
No. of Different Words: 207 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.415 4.7
Average Word Length: 5.311 4.6
Word Length SD: 3.012 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 158 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 124 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 104 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 68 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 23.75 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 11.339 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.688 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.318 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.564 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.051 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 7, column 299, Rule ID: SOME_OF_THE[1]
Message: Simply use 'some'.
Suggestion: some
...ate from elementary school. Even worse, some of the disabilities join gangsters to sell dru...
^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 9, column 44, Rule ID: THIS_NNS[1]
Message: Did you mean 'these'?
Suggestion: these
...ng to the negative impacts by following this suggestions and the promising result by...
^^^^
Discourse Markers used:
['accordingly', 'but', 'consequently', 'however', 'if', 'may', 'so', 'therefore', 'for example', 'for instance', 'such as', 'as a result', 'in spite of', 'on the other hand']
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance in Part of Speech:
Nouns: 0.218309859155 0.240241500013 91% => OK
Verbs: 0.169014084507 0.157235817809 107% => OK
Adjectives: 0.110328638498 0.0880659088768 125% => OK
Adverbs: 0.0469483568075 0.0497285424764 94% => OK
Pronouns: 0.0446009389671 0.0444667217837 100% => OK
Prepositions: 0.112676056338 0.12292977631 92% => OK
Participles: 0.0586854460094 0.0406280797675 144% => OK
Conjunctions: 3.13956412275 2.79330140395 112% => OK
Infinitives: 0.0422535211268 0.030933414821 137% => OK
Particles: 0.0 0.0016655270985 0% => OK
Determiners: 0.0845070422535 0.0997080785238 85% => OK
Modal_auxiliary: 0.0258215962441 0.0249443105267 104% => OK
WH_determiners: 0.0093896713615 0.0148568991511 63% => OK
Vocabulary words and sentences:
No of characters: 2462.0 2732.02544248 90% => OK
No of words: 380.0 452.878318584 84% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 6.47894736842 6.0361032391 107% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.41515443553 4.58838876751 96% => OK
words length more than 5 chars: 0.418421052632 0.366273622748 114% => OK
words length more than 6 chars: 0.344736842105 0.280924506359 123% => OK
words length more than 7 chars: 0.297368421053 0.200843997647 148% => OK
words length more than 8 chars: 0.202631578947 0.132149295362 153% => OK
Word Length SD: 3.13956412275 2.79330140395 112% => OK
Unique words: 209.0 219.290929204 95% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.55 0.48968727796 112% => OK
Word variations: 61.9447893866 55.4138127331 112% => OK
How many sentences: 16.0 20.6194690265 78% => OK
Sentence length: 23.75 23.380412469 102% => OK
Sentence length SD: 77.2365481815 59.4972553346 130% => OK
Chars per sentence: 153.875 141.124799967 109% => OK
Words per sentence: 23.75 23.380412469 102% => OK
Discourse Markers: 0.875 0.674092028746 130% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 4.94800884956 101% => OK
Language errors: 2.0 5.21349557522 38% => OK
Readability: 58.2236842105 51.4728631049 113% => OK
Elegance: 1.4954954955 1.64882698954 91% => OK
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.434735279355 0.391690518653 111% => OK
Sentence sentence coherence: 0.0823455645803 0.123202303941 67% => OK
Sentence sentence coherence SD: 0.0485111507811 0.077325440228 63% => OK
Sentence paragraph coherence: 0.550385746388 0.547984918172 100% => OK
Sentence paragraph coherence SD: 0.179862387481 0.149214159877 121% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.18291372552 0.161403998019 113% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0833820285132 0.0892212321368 93% => OK
Paragraph paragraph coherence: 0.315603521556 0.385218514788 82% => OK
Paragraph paragraph coherence SD: 0.0576481130742 0.0692045440612 83% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.299636327496 0.275328986314 109% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0409979108744 0.0653680567796 63% => The ideas may be duplicated in paragraphs.
Task Achievement:
Sentences with positive sentiment : 5.0 10.4325221239 48% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 9.0 5.30420353982 170% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 2.0 4.88274336283 41% => OK
Positive topic words: 4.0 7.22455752212 55% => OK
Negative topic words: 7.0 3.66592920354 191% => OK
Neutral topic words: 2.0 2.70907079646 74% => OK
Total topic words: 13.0 13.5995575221 96% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
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Rates: 50.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.0 Out of 6
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Note: This is not the final score. The e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.