School should do more to prepare students for the non-academic aspects of adulthood.
Education is one of the most important thing; the development of a country can be determined by the total percentage of people that are educated. “No Child is Left Behind” it is the mantra every country in the world trying to follow to make sure all the kids are educated.The prompt recommends that the schools should teach children how to face the real world as adult. I agree with the suggestion and I argue that the children should have knowledge beyond academic education for below reasons.
Many schools in India consider academic education as most important assent and these academic education doesn’t mostly have any real life applications. The main focus in the academic education is to teach the children how to memorize and reproduce what all were memorized in Exams. The students who excel very well in academic education suffer a great deal when they have to face some dire situations. For instance, Nikole Testla, One of the best inventor, who was responsible for discovering Alternating Current. Tesla was known to be an excellent student but his excellence in studies didn’t make him successful as one would expect him to be; this was due to his inability to make right business decisions. If he had knowledge on how to deal with real life difficult financial situations, his life wouldn’t have had bad ending. This example clearly illustrate how important it is to educate children on real life issues,difficulties and how to face these issues. This will help them navigate through adulthood in a better way.
The academic studies often teach children how to win(Clear the exam) but in real life we are not always in a place were we can win, failure is inevitable; Schools doesn’t really prepare children for failure. A study suggests that the students who have been successful in academic education and they face a failure in life they become downhearted and doesn’t know how to cope with the failure. The only way they can be prepared if they had been taught about scenarios during their school life. Beyond academic subjects like Maths and science,The students should be exposed to non-academic like sports,music etc. Many private schools doesn’t expose children non-academic things; When the children are exposed to different non-academic things it will help the children to find who they are passionate about. When is real-life the academic education didn’t help them be successful as they wanted to, the non-academic things will help excel in different aspects.
Of-course, One might argue that the companies such as Google, Microsoft hires people with very good academic background. Yes, it is true but people without much of academic education were able to build many multi-million dollar companies such as Richard of Virgin Airline, Deymond of FUBU etc. Education is important but education doesn’t mean only academic education; It should be both academic and Non-academic education.
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 3, column 283, Rule ID: SENTENCE_WHITESPACE
Message: Add a space between sentences
Suggestion: The
... to make sure all the kids are educated.The prompt recommends that the schools shou...
^^^
Line 7, column 162, Rule ID: MAIN_FOCUS[1]
Message: Use simply 'focus'.
Suggestion: focus
...ly have any real life applications. The main focus in the academic education is to teach t...
^^^^^^^^^^
Line 7, column 937, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma
Suggestion: , difficulties
... to educate children on real life issues,difficulties and how to face these issues. This will...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 11, column 549, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma
Suggestion: , The
...academic subjects like Maths and science,The students should be exposed to non-acade...
^^^^
Line 11, column 608, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma
Suggestion: , music
...d be exposed to non-academic like sports,music etc. Many private schools doesn't ...
^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
but, if, really, so, well, for instance, such as, it is true
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 29.0 19.5258426966 149% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 12.0 12.4196629213 97% => OK
Conjunction : 12.0 14.8657303371 81% => OK
Relative clauses : 12.0 11.3162921348 106% => OK
Pronoun: 35.0 33.0505617978 106% => OK
Preposition: 57.0 58.6224719101 97% => OK
Nominalization: 18.0 12.9106741573 139% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2499.0 2235.4752809 112% => OK
No of words: 476.0 442.535393258 108% => OK
Chars per words: 5.25 5.05705443957 104% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.67091256922 4.55969084622 102% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.9182933345 2.79657885939 104% => OK
Unique words: 224.0 215.323595506 104% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.470588235294 0.4932671777 95% => OK
syllable_count: 787.5 704.065955056 112% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.7 1.59117977528 107% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 8.0 6.24550561798 128% => OK
Article: 9.0 4.99550561798 180% => OK
Subordination: 3.0 3.10617977528 97% => OK
Conjunction: 0.0 1.77640449438 0% => OK
Preposition: 1.0 4.38483146067 23% => More preposition wanted as sentence beginning.
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 20.0 20.2370786517 99% => OK
Sentence length: 23.0 23.0359550562 100% => OK
Sentence length SD: 41.2226879279 60.3974514979 68% => OK
Chars per sentence: 124.95 118.986275619 105% => OK
Words per sentence: 23.8 23.4991977007 101% => OK
Discourse Markers: 3.0 5.21951772744 57% => More transition words/phrases wanted.
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.97078651685 80% => OK
Language errors: 5.0 7.80617977528 64% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 16.0 10.2758426966 156% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 3.0 5.13820224719 58% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 1.0 4.83258426966 21% => More facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.223535897983 0.243740707755 92% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0771610096729 0.0831039109588 93% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0565993688927 0.0758088955206 75% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.142820381743 0.150359130593 95% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0499347841283 0.0667264976115 75% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 15.2 14.1392134831 108% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 39.67 48.8420337079 81% => OK
smog_index: 11.2 7.92365168539 141% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 13.4 12.1743820225 110% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 13.47 12.1639044944 111% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.0 8.38706741573 95% => OK
difficult_words: 97.0 100.480337079 97% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 15.5 11.8971910112 130% => OK
gunning_fog: 11.2 11.2143820225 100% => OK
text_standard: 16.0 11.7820224719 136% => OK
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Better to have 5/6 paragraphs with 3/4 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: reason 4. address both of the views presented for reason 4 (optional)
para 6: conclusion.
Rates: 66.67 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 4.0 Out of 6
---------------------
Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.