With the development of formal education, more and more people tend to receive systematic education. It is discussed that formal education may harm people’s freedom and deteriorate their creativity. In my opinion, I agree that this kind of education may restrain student’ freedom while it is still reasonable to promote systematic education for three reasons.
On the one hand, if students all receive formal education and have a more comprehensible curriculum, their academic ability would be developed and universities may have a more reliable criterion to assess their grades. For example, if there isn’t formal education, students would receive different education and the structure of their knowledge may lack of specific subjects. And it would be more difficult for schools to examine their academic ability. In that case, students can be admitted to suitable universities and get higher education they wanted. And the admission will be more fair and easier. Students from poor background may have the chance to receive systematic education which may seem to belong to rich families in the past. Thus, it is useful and reasonable to promote formal education in the long term.
On the other hand, in some subjects such as physics, people’s creativity plays an important role in achieving success. If students all receive formal education without chances to develop their own ideas and explore the world independently, they would lack the ability to get achievements in these areas. Teachers may teach students with a more general pace which may not suit some talented students because the talented may find the lessons too easy. As a result, some students may find themselves losing the freedom to learn what they want to learn and it would be hard for them to study at their own pace.
In addition, government may use the way to promote their own political ideas and influence students implicitly at their young age. If it is the case, the freedom of students to think independently would be harmed. For example, in Korea, textbooks usually regard the government as good and promote students to believe the culture which belonged to other nations as Korean. In this way, many children’s ability of thinking independently are deteriorated.
In conclusion, while it may be true that promoting formal education is a good way to promote fair education and help universities to choose students with more reliable criterion, I argue that we should be aware of the possibility of deteriorating students’ creativity and the danger of government promoting their political opinions through formal education. When promoting formal education, we should pay attention to the possible danger.
Transition Words or Phrases used:
if, may, so, still, thus, while, for example, in addition, in conclusion, kind of, such as, as a result, in my opinion, on the other hand
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 14.0 19.5258426966 72% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 22.0 12.4196629213 177% => OK
Conjunction : 16.0 14.8657303371 108% => OK
Relative clauses : 9.0 11.3162921348 80% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 35.0 33.0505617978 106% => OK
Preposition: 52.0 58.6224719101 89% => OK
Nominalization: 23.0 12.9106741573 178% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2279.0 2235.4752809 102% => OK
No of words: 430.0 442.535393258 97% => OK
Chars per words: 5.3 5.05705443957 105% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.55372829156 4.55969084622 100% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.88432195537 2.79657885939 103% => OK
Unique words: 197.0 215.323595506 91% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.458139534884 0.4932671777 93% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 714.6 704.065955056 101% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.7 1.59117977528 107% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 7.0 6.24550561798 112% => OK
Article: 1.0 4.99550561798 20% => OK
Subordination: 7.0 3.10617977528 225% => Less adverbial clause wanted.
Conjunction: 2.0 1.77640449438 113% => OK
Preposition: 10.0 4.38483146067 228% => Less preposition wanted as sentence beginnings.
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 20.0 20.2370786517 99% => OK
Sentence length: 21.0 23.0359550562 91% => OK
Sentence length SD: 66.5389171839 60.3974514979 110% => OK
Chars per sentence: 113.95 118.986275619 96% => OK
Words per sentence: 21.5 23.4991977007 91% => OK
Discourse Markers: 6.85 5.21951772744 131% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 4.97078651685 101% => OK
Language errors: 0.0 7.80617977528 0% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 14.0 10.2758426966 136% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 5.0 5.13820224719 97% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 1.0 4.83258426966 21% => More facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.12931563738 0.243740707755 53% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0502857127248 0.0831039109588 61% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0388261230459 0.0758088955206 51% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.0873589389989 0.150359130593 58% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0412919195712 0.0667264976115 62% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 14.3 14.1392134831 101% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 41.7 48.8420337079 85% => OK
smog_index: 11.2 7.92365168539 141% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 12.7 12.1743820225 104% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 13.46 12.1639044944 111% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.95 8.38706741573 95% => OK
difficult_words: 89.0 100.480337079 89% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 14.0 11.8971910112 118% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.4 11.2143820225 93% => OK
text_standard: 14.0 11.7820224719 119% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Rates: 66.67 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 4.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.