The fact that people, belonging to different national and ethnic origins, tend to have diverse opinions shows how segmented the world is. However, even at a community level, every individual has his or her own opinion to matters of societal concerns and as such, we can perceive a plethora of views even within a diaspora. This raises an important question as to whether one should travel multitudes of places to develop a collective knowledge of the people or should one stay close to people within a certain community to gather insight into the prevalent beliefs of that community. In my opinion, I believe that it is imperative to develop a world-view of people in order to better connect and relate to them, and to do so, there must be adequate amount of interaction with the people of different communities, which necessitates substantial travel around the globe.
What is important to understand is that even though individuals pertaining to a single community have their own opinions, their collective view is regarded as most important from a global perspective. While certain individuals may be prejudiced by traditional and orthodox practices, whether the majority of the people of a certain community has consensus amongst themselves regarding such practices is what helps in ascertaining their progressive and communal beliefs. For example, even in a secular country like India, people belonging to a single religion hold different opinions on matter such as consumption of meat. While staunch Hindu supporters would deem such consumption as impious and sometimes, sacrilegious, other more liberal Hindus would show precedents how a non-vegetarian diet has been a practice throughout the history of Hinduism. Hence, even within a certain community, there is diversity of opinion and as such if you carefully study the distribution based on individuals, it is unlikely to find a common ground. However, if you look for a majority of Hindu people in India, one can easily comment that most of them are pious and closely follow a vegetarian diet, while intermittently enjoying delicacies, such as Biriyani, that have their origin in the country’s history, though not strictly in Hindu diet.
Indisputably, one needs to study a particular community in details to assert the overall viewpoint of the people. This also requires substantial amount of interaction with disparate groups which necessitates that one should invest time and patience. However, once an individual has adequately made progresses in understanding the community, it is important to realise that such a community, although dispersed throughout the globe, does not completely represent all the inhabitants of different nations. In order to gather opposing viewpoints, one must be willing to connect with the largest number of people, across national, societal and age-related boundaries. For example, a Hindu in India is likely to be staunch towards maintaining his vegetarian diet while another in the United States might follow a less restricted one which composes of both meat and vegetables. Thus, in talking about a religion, if one considers only communities pertaining to a national boundary, the data that he collects might not be sufficient in adequately representing people of the same community across countries.
Hence, it is important to understand that norms of societal acceptance across nations around the world often shape a community’s standards and opinions. As a result, in order to better connect with the people of such a community, one needs to assert their common as well as disparate characteristics. This can only be done if there is significant representation of such diverse views and opinions. Hence, quite convincingly, it stands important that in order to better understand the thoughts of people, one must travel around the globe rather than studying the people of a single community alone.
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 358, Rule ID: WHETHER[6]
Message: Can you shorten this phrase to just 'whether', or rephrase the sentence to avoid "as to"?
Suggestion: whether
...pora. This raises an important question as to whether one should travel multitudes of places ...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, hence, however, if, look, may, regarding, so, thus, well, while, as to, for example, such as, talking about, as a result, as well as, in my opinion
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 20.0 19.5258426966 102% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 14.0 12.4196629213 113% => OK
Conjunction : 16.0 14.8657303371 108% => OK
Relative clauses : 14.0 11.3162921348 124% => OK
Pronoun: 36.0 33.0505617978 109% => OK
Preposition: 92.0 58.6224719101 157% => OK
Nominalization: 10.0 12.9106741573 77% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 3292.0 2235.4752809 147% => OK
No of words: 617.0 442.535393258 139% => Less content wanted.
Chars per words: 5.33549432739 5.05705443957 106% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.98392262146 4.55969084622 109% => OK
Word Length SD: 3.06621070125 2.79657885939 110% => OK
Unique words: 291.0 215.323595506 135% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.471636952998 0.4932671777 96% => OK
syllable_count: 1049.4 704.065955056 149% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.7 1.59117977528 107% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 11.0 6.24550561798 176% => OK
Article: 3.0 4.99550561798 60% => OK
Subordination: 8.0 3.10617977528 258% => Less adverbial clause wanted.
Conjunction: 1.0 1.77640449438 56% => OK
Preposition: 5.0 4.38483146067 114% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 20.0 20.2370786517 99% => OK
Sentence length: 30.0 23.0359550562 130% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively long.
Sentence length SD: 56.6969796374 60.3974514979 94% => OK
Chars per sentence: 164.6 118.986275619 138% => OK
Words per sentence: 30.85 23.4991977007 131% => OK
Discourse Markers: 7.9 5.21951772744 151% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.97078651685 80% => OK
Language errors: 1.0 7.80617977528 13% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 17.0 10.2758426966 165% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 0.0 5.13820224719 0% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 3.0 4.83258426966 62% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.18795341659 0.243740707755 77% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0591692090682 0.0831039109588 71% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0590517279476 0.0758088955206 78% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.130273828878 0.150359130593 87% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0520127853884 0.0667264976115 78% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 19.1 14.1392134831 135% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 32.57 48.8420337079 67% => OK
smog_index: 11.2 7.92365168539 141% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 16.2 12.1743820225 133% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 14.28 12.1639044944 117% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 9.04 8.38706741573 108% => OK
difficult_words: 153.0 100.480337079 152% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 18.5 11.8971910112 155% => OK
gunning_fog: 14.0 11.2143820225 125% => OK
text_standard: 19.0 11.7820224719 161% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Better to have 5/6 paragraphs with 3/4 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: reason 4. address both of the views presented for reason 4 (optional)
para 6: conclusion.
Rates: 66.67 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 4.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.