Young people should be encouraged to pursue long-term, realistic goals rather than seek immediate fame and recognition.
Write a response in which you discuss the extent to which you agree or disagree with the recommendation and explain your reasoning for the position you take. In developing and supporting your position, describe specific circumstances in which adopting the recommendation would or would not be advantageous and explain how these examples shape your position.
The younger generation are the basis of the future. Their contribution to this future depends on their goals. The prompt recommends that youngsters not to look for the near future with some insignificant goals, and aim for more robust and rational objectives. In my opinion I strongly agree with this suggestion and argue that young people look at the future not at the present when seeking their goals for two reasons.
To begin, immediate fame and recognition can vanish as quick as it came. The dissipating of this mirage could leave a negative impact on the youngsters. For instance, a young man invests a lot in his relatively famous YouTube channel to reach hundreds of thousands of subscribers in a few years. However, he misses out the best time to enter college or enter the business world and focus on his channel. Later on, as he grew up, his expenses increase, his channel was not enough to support him, his subscribers are not increasing and he is almost out of content for it. Thus, he decided to follow the trend and open a new channel for Gaming, which apparently has a massive fan base. The new channel was a huge failure and merely gets thousands of views, and because of ignoring the old channel, he almost doesn’t get anything back from it. His fall left him broken with no skills, no degree, no source of income and unsuccessful channels in a competitive and harsh world. He should had thought about this situation and prepare for it while at his peak, because fame will not last forever, and it will dissipate at some point.
Further, instant fame and recognition can diminish the passion of a young man and destroy his life. To illustrate, looking at the protagonist of the popular movie series Home Alon, who became very famous at such a young age, but where he is now? Where did he disappear? After reaching his peak, what is the point of passion? With his popularity and wealth, he can try everything he can, but what else? That what destroyed him. With a wealthy, famous and boring life, he went to drugs and became a drug addict. His social life destructed and his life became forlorn. If he was encouraged to seek a long-term and realistic goals and following his passion rather than focusing on his present illusionary achievements, he could have reached a higher peak and live a happy and more productive life.
Of course, some argue that live is short and someone may not be able to accomplish a long-term goal, so it is better to live the moment and enjoy it. However, fame and recognition are not always bad. If it used wisely, it can be a tool to prepare for the future. Also, no one can predict the future and know what is waiting him. Hence, young people should not be frivolous and seek some significant objective that will not only benefit them, but also their societies or maybe even the whole world.
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, apparently, but, hence, however, if, look, may, so, thus, while, for instance, of course, in my opinion
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 15.0 19.5258426966 77% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 14.0 12.4196629213 113% => OK
Conjunction : 33.0 14.8657303371 222% => Less conjunction wanted
Relative clauses : 10.0 11.3162921348 88% => OK
Pronoun: 56.0 33.0505617978 169% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 51.0 58.6224719101 87% => OK
Nominalization: 8.0 12.9106741573 62% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2347.0 2235.4752809 105% => OK
No of words: 505.0 442.535393258 114% => OK
Chars per words: 4.64752475248 5.05705443957 92% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.74048574033 4.55969084622 104% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.52139944306 2.79657885939 90% => OK
Unique words: 265.0 215.323595506 123% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.524752475248 0.4932671777 106% => OK
syllable_count: 730.8 704.065955056 104% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.4 1.59117977528 88% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 15.0 6.24550561798 240% => Less pronouns wanted as sentence beginning.
Article: 5.0 4.99550561798 100% => OK
Subordination: 5.0 3.10617977528 161% => OK
Conjunction: 6.0 1.77640449438 338% => Less conjunction wanted as sentence beginning.
Preposition: 7.0 4.38483146067 160% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 27.0 20.2370786517 133% => OK
Sentence length: 18.0 23.0359550562 78% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively short.
Sentence length SD: 51.4227482714 60.3974514979 85% => OK
Chars per sentence: 86.9259259259 118.986275619 73% => OK
Words per sentence: 18.7037037037 23.4991977007 80% => OK
Discourse Markers: 4.03703703704 5.21951772744 77% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.97078651685 80% => OK
Language errors: 0.0 7.80617977528 0% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 17.0 10.2758426966 165% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 8.0 5.13820224719 156% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 2.0 4.83258426966 41% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.155560965908 0.243740707755 64% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0412042308675 0.0831039109588 50% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0434951784906 0.0758088955206 57% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.102048678268 0.150359130593 68% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0294696049373 0.0667264976115 44% => Paragraphs are similar to each other. Some content may get duplicated or it is not exactly right on the topic.
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 9.8 14.1392134831 69% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 70.13 48.8420337079 144% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 7.92365168539 39% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 7.9 12.1743820225 65% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 9.69 12.1639044944 80% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.66 8.38706741573 91% => OK
difficult_words: 100.0 100.480337079 100% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 7.0 11.8971910112 59% => Linsear_write_formula is low.
gunning_fog: 9.2 11.2143820225 82% => OK
text_standard: 10.0 11.7820224719 85% => OK
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Better to have 5/6 paragraphs with 3/4 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: reason 4. address both of the views presented for reason 4 (optional)
para 6: conclusion.
Rates: 50.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.0 Out of 6
---------------------
Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.