you recently bought a piece of equipment for your kitchen but it did not work. you phoned the shop but no action was taken.Write a letter to the shop manager.In your letter1. Describe the problem with the equipment2. Explain what happened when you phoned

Essay topics:

you recently bought a piece of equipment for your kitchen but it did not work. you phoned the shop but no action was taken.
Write a letter to the shop manager.In your letter

1. Describe the problem with the equipment
2. Explain what happened when you phoned the shop
3 say what you would like the manager to do

Dear Sir or Madam,

I write to inform you of the problem with the electric cooker I bought from your shop three weeks ago. I could not imagine that your shop are yet to replace the equipment in spite of my several calls to report the issue.

The Item was delivered to me by your delivery team, five days after I made the other. When they arrived at my house,they dropped the item and were in a hurry to leave but I insisted we test the cooker together. They quickly mounted it, plugged it to electricity and put it on. For fifteen minutes, the cooker produced no heat. Coupled with the fact that we observed a crack on the glass cover, I asked them to take the cooker along with them. They told me that since this was the first time it is being used, I should allow it for additional one hour and call them on a number on the receipt, if it still does not work.

At this point, I allowed them to go and one hour later, there was still no heat. I called the number and a customer rep picked it up and introduced herself as Nkechi. I explained the problem to Nkechi, and she told me the shop would call me back. I have waited for over seven days now. I did not get a call from shop nor have I seen the delivery team.

Sir/Madam, I implore you to use your good office to avert this injustice. I would like that you send someone to come and pick up the faulty cooker and deliver to me, a working cooker.

Yours faithfully,
Okoronkwo Alfred.

Votes
Average: 7 (1 vote)

Comments

your shop are yet to replace the equipment
Description: can you re-write this sentence?

five days after I made the other.
five days after I made the ???

flaws:
More sentences varieties wanted. Try to use less pronouns or not to use pronouns (like 'I, They, We...') as the subject of a sentence.

Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 6.5 out of 9
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 2 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 17 10
No. of Words: 281 200
No. of Characters: 1122 1000
No. of Different Words: 158 100
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.094 4.0
Average Word Length: 3.993 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.018 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 57 60
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 37 50
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 17 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 9 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 16.529 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 8.067 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.235 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.328 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.602 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.184 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 6 4