Your local hospital has advertised for people to do unpaid work helping at the hospital. You would like to do some work at the hospital in your free time.
Write a letter to the hospital.In your letter
.Explain why you would like to do unpaid work at the hospital
.Say what type of unpaid work you would be able to do
.give details of when you would be available for the work
Dear Sir, Madam,
I am Hishanthi Jayawardena who is doing higher studies in National Institute of business Management in Borella. I am writing to you this letter regarding of your advertisement, which mentioned that you need people for the hospital work voluntary.
If you give permission I would like to work at your hospital very happily.As I am on my vacation , I thought it would be great that if I can do a voluntary work like this. If I say frankly, I first got this idea when my grandfather was in hospital last year and I saw how he was unable to do his work own. That day I was determined, one day I will help to the people who can not manage their works their own. So here it is. I have found the place what I was looking for. Jut only need your permission to do so.
Let me tell you what I'm able to do. I preferred to help mostly the elderly people. But it doesn't matter others too. I can help to elderly people by feeding them,by helping hand for their evening works so on. But I'm afraid to say that I won't be able to help with put medicines to the wounds as I'm bit scary to the blood. Except that I can do any other work which your expecting from me.
And here are the days I'm available in. As I mentioned nowadays I'm in vacation till next 20th. So I able to come any of dates with in this period. After 20th, I'm free on every Tuesdays and Fridays as there are no lectures for me.
So consider all the things I mentioned and I would be really grateful if you can give this opportunity to helping hand of a person. I'm looking forward to hear from you.
Yours Faithfully,
(Hishanthi Jayawardena)
So I able to come
So I am able to come
Sentence: I am writing to you this letter regarding of your advertisement, which mentioned that you need people for the hospital work voluntary.
Description: A noun, singular, common is not usually followed by an adjective
Suggestion: Refer to work and voluntary
Sentence: If I say frankly, I first got this idea when my grandfather was in hospital last year and I saw how he was unable to do his work own.
Description: A noun, singular, common is not usually followed by an adjective
Suggestion: Refer to work and own
flaws:
No. of Grammatical Errors: 3 2
No. of Words: 320 200
Write the essay in 20 minutes.
Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 6.5 out of 9
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 3 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 22 10
No. of Words: 320 200
No. of Characters: 1269 1000
No. of Different Words: 157 100
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.229 4.0
Average Word Length: 3.966 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.404 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 69 60
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 51 50
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 35 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 23 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 14.545 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 8.83 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.455 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.321 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.58 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.14 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 4