A large company in your area has decided to spend a certain amount of money either to sponsor a local children s sports team for two years or to pay for two open air concerts It has asked for feedback from the general public Write a letter to the company

Essay topics:

A large company in your area has decided to spend a certain amount of money, either to sponsor a local children's sports team for two years, or to pay for two open air concerts. It has asked for feedback from the general public.

Write a letter to the company. In your letter

describe the benefits of sponsoring the sports team
summarize the benefits of paying for the concerts
say how you think the company should spend the money

Dear Sir or Madam,

I am writing this letter to provide my feedback on your thought of sponsoring local children's sports team or paying for open air concerts

Undoubtedly, the children in our city play extremely well, and that has been observed many times in the past. It would be commendable if you can sponsor this team as it will help children to shape their future in sports. Not only it will be beneficial for them, but also for the city and country whose name will shine when this team will play internationally later on.

Paying for concerts also hold tremendous benefits. People of our city usually do not get a chance to attend any concerts. With an event like this, people will get exposure and your company's name will be highlighted in a positive way.

According to me, sponsoring sports team will give us more fruitful results. Your company can provide right equipments to the team and some staff to train them so that they can pull up their socks to play at higher levels.

I hope my feedback is considered.

Thanks
Sanya

Votes
Average: 7.3 (1 vote)

Comments

Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 7, column 216, Rule ID: IN_A_X_MANNER[1]
Message: Consider replacing "in a positive way" with adverb for "positive"; eg, "in a hasty manner" with "hastily".
... your companys name will be highlighted in a positive way. According to me, sponsoring sports ...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 9, column 1, Rule ID: ACCORDING_TO_ME[1]
Message: This phrase can sound awkward in English. Consider using 'in my opinion' or 'I think'.
Suggestion: In my opinion; I think
...ll be highlighted in a positive way. According to me, sponsoring sports team will give us mo...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^

Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, if, so, well

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 5.0 7.48453608247 67% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 11.0 4.92783505155 223% => Less auxiliary verb wanted.
Conjunction : 7.0 5.05154639175 139% => OK
Relative clauses : 4.0 3.03092783505 132% => OK
Pronoun: 26.0 32.9175257732 79% => OK
Preposition: 20.0 26.3917525773 76% => OK
Nominalization: 0.0 3.85567010309 0% => More nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 871.0 937.175257732 93% => OK
No of words: 184.0 206.0 89% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 4.73369565217 4.54256449028 104% => OK
Fourth root words length: 3.68302321012 3.78020617076 97% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.47424708335 2.54303337028 97% => OK
Unique words: 122.0 127.690721649 96% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.663043478261 0.622605031667 106% => OK
syllable_count: 254.7 290.88556701 88% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.4 1.41237113402 99% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 4.0 9.13402061856 44% => OK
Article: 1.0 0.824742268041 121% => OK
Subordination: 0.0 1.83505154639 0% => More adverbial clause wanted.
Conjunction: 2.0 0.463917525773 431% => Less conjunction wanted as sentence beginning.
Preposition: 2.0 1.44329896907 139% => OK

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 9.0 12.6804123711 71% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 20.0 16.3608247423 122% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively long.
Sentence length SD: 70.7491342703 44.8134815571 158% => OK
Chars per sentence: 96.7777777778 76.5299724578 126% => OK
Words per sentence: 20.4444444444 16.8248392259 122% => OK
Discourse Markers: 2.55555555556 4.34317383033 59% => More transition words/phrases wanted.
Paragraphs: 5.0 4.29896907216 116% => OK
Language errors: 2.0 2.54639175258 79% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 8.0 7.41237113402 108% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 1.0 1.49484536082 67% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 1.0 3.94845360825 25% => More facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.248662302513 0.216113520407 115% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0879813403209 0.0766984524023 115% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0826653661705 0.0603063233224 137% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.154619489634 0.12726935374 121% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.13073298421 0.0580467560999 225% => More connections among paragraphs wanted.

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 11.1 8.37731958763 133% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 68.1 70.7449484536 96% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 3.82989690722 81% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 8.7 7.45979381443 117% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 10.15 8.71597938144 116% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.63 7.59969072165 100% => OK
difficult_words: 35.0 41.2886597938 85% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 14.0 8.62886597938 162% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.0 8.54432989691 117% => OK
text_standard: 10.0 8.15463917526 123% => OK
What are above readability scores?

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Rates: 73.0337078652 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 6.5 Out of 9
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.