you are looking for a part-time job at a football club. write a letter to the manager of the football club. In your letter, introduce yourself, explain what experience and special skill you have, tell him/her when you think you could start.

Essay topics:

you are looking for a part-time job at a football club. write a letter to the manager of the football club. In your letter, introduce yourself, explain what experience and special skill you have, tell him/her when you think you could start.

Dear sir/madam,
My name is John and I am a second years student of X college. As you know Vancouver is a fairly expensive city, so I am looking for a part-time job for paying a school fee and accommodation. Luckily, the good thing came to me in this morning that I saw your advertisement on daily newspaper and i wrote this letter for you immediately.
I am a hard-working and sharpie. I used to not only a waitress at LA restaurant in last summer holiday but also a cicerone in X museum in every weekend. Especially,I can speak Chinese strongly fluently. I know that your football club place at numerous Chinese area and I wonder if you need anyone who can speak Chinese I able to be a guide for your Chinese member in your club.
Although I almost busy in every morning, I am free at 12 am to 9 pm everyday. Therefore, my earliest convenience to start working is at 1 pm on July 2nd.
I hope for hearing from you. Yours Sincerely, John Smith.

Votes
Average: 5.5 (3 votes)

Comments

Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 2, column 35, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[1]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'years'' or 'year's'?
Suggestion: years'; year's
...dam, My name is John and I am a second years student of X college. As you know Vanco...
^^^^^
Line 2, column 242, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...he good thing came to me in this morning that I saw your advertisement on daily n...
^^
Line 2, column 297, Rule ID: I_LOWERCASE[2]
Message: Did you mean 'I'?
Suggestion: I
...ur advertisement on daily newspaper and i wrote this letter for you immediately. ...
^
Line 3, column 163, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma
Suggestion: , I
...in X museum in every weekend. Especially,I can speak Chinese strongly fluently. I ...
^^
Line 4, column 69, Rule ID: EVERYDAY_EVERY_DAY[3]
Message: 'Everyday' is an adjective. Did you mean 'every day'?
Suggestion: every day
...ery morning, I am free at 12 am to 9 pm everyday. Therefore, my earliest convenience to ...
^^^^^^^^

Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, if, look, second, so, therefore, you know

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 4.0 7.48453608247 53% => More to be verbs wanted.
Auxiliary verbs: 3.0 4.92783505155 61% => OK
Conjunction : 6.0 5.05154639175 119% => OK
Relative clauses : 3.0 3.03092783505 99% => OK
Pronoun: 29.0 32.9175257732 88% => OK
Preposition: 19.0 26.3917525773 72% => OK
Nominalization: 3.0 3.85567010309 78% => OK

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 774.0 937.175257732 83% => OK
No of words: 178.0 206.0 86% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 4.34831460674 4.54256449028 96% => OK
Fourth root words length: 3.65262427087 3.78020617076 97% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.8351812545 2.54303337028 111% => OK
Unique words: 115.0 127.690721649 90% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.64606741573 0.622605031667 104% => OK
syllable_count: 246.6 290.88556701 85% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.4 1.41237113402 99% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 9.0 9.13402061856 99% => OK
Article: 1.0 0.824742268041 121% => OK
Subordination: 2.0 1.83505154639 109% => OK
Conjunction: 0.0 0.463917525773 0% => OK
Preposition: 0.0 1.44329896907 0% => More preposition wanted as sentence beginning.

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 11.0 12.6804123711 87% => OK
Sentence length: 16.0 16.3608247423 98% => OK
Sentence length SD: 47.9977616558 44.8134815571 107% => OK
Chars per sentence: 70.3636363636 76.5299724578 92% => OK
Words per sentence: 16.1818181818 16.8248392259 96% => OK
Discourse Markers: 4.72727272727 4.34317383033 109% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.29896907216 93% => OK
Language errors: 5.0 2.54639175258 196% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 7.0 7.41237113402 94% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 0.0 1.49484536082 0% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 4.0 3.94845360825 101% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.264385052927 0.216113520407 122% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0799554113396 0.0766984524023 104% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.085043903154 0.0603063233224 141% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.146059966131 0.12726935374 115% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0633247175441 0.0580467560999 109% => OK

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 7.1 8.37731958763 85% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 72.16 70.7449484536 102% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 3.82989690722 81% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 7.2 7.45979381443 97% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 7.65 8.71597938144 88% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.36 7.59969072165 97% => OK
difficult_words: 33.0 41.2886597938 80% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 8.0 8.62886597938 93% => OK
gunning_fog: 8.4 8.54432989691 98% => OK
text_standard: 8.0 8.15463917526 98% => OK
What are above readability scores?

---------------------
Rates: 64.606741573 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 5.75 Out of 9
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.