You have just received a letter from an overseas university saying that your IELTS bandscore of 6 is too low for admission to any of its Master’s Courses ( you need 6.5)Write a letter to the admissions officer. In your letter Introduce yourself.

Essay topics:

You have just received a letter from an overseas university saying that your IELTS band
score of 6 is too low for admission to any of its Master’s Courses ( you need 6.5)
Write a letter to the admissions officer. In your letter
 Introduce yourself.
 Enquire about any alternative ways of gaining entrance

Dear sir or madam,
I am writing with regard to a letter I received from you dated 21th of July.

My name is Rahi Honarvar and I have applied for the computer science and technology major at your university. I sent all the
requested documents such as my bachelor degree, My IELTS score and the like. Unfortunately, after reading your letter I
realized that my IELTS score does not meet the minimum score which is accepted by the Computer faculty.

Since it is of high importance for me to get the admission in this field and for the first semester of the educational year, I would be grateful if you could provide me with some information about any possible alternative for gaining the entrance. I was wondering if it is feasible for me to take the IELTS exam again while I am studying at the university?

I am looking forward to your prompt consideration and swift answer.
Yours sincerely,
Rahi Honarvar

Votes
Average: 7.3 (1 vote)
Essays by the user:

Comments

Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 19, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
Dear sir or madam, I am writing with regard to a letter I r...
^^^
Line 4, column 125, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...major at your university. I sent all the requested documents such as my bachelor ...
^^^
Line 5, column 120, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...fortunately, after reading your letter I realized that my IELTS score does not me...
^^^

Transition Words or Phrases used:
first, if, look, so, while, such as, with regard to

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 6.0 7.48453608247 80% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 2.0 4.92783505155 41% => OK
Conjunction : 6.0 5.05154639175 119% => OK
Relative clauses : 2.0 3.03092783505 66% => OK
Pronoun: 26.0 32.9175257732 79% => OK
Preposition: 18.0 26.3917525773 68% => OK
Nominalization: 5.0 3.85567010309 130% => OK

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 762.0 937.175257732 81% => OK
No of words: 161.0 206.0 78% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 4.73291925466 4.54256449028 104% => OK
Fourth root words length: 3.56210296601 3.78020617076 94% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.74683077006 2.54303337028 108% => OK
Unique words: 105.0 127.690721649 82% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.652173913043 0.622605031667 105% => OK
syllable_count: 243.9 290.88556701 84% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.41237113402 106% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 8.0 9.13402061856 88% => OK
Article: 0.0 0.824742268041 0% => OK
Subordination: 2.0 1.83505154639 109% => OK
Conjunction: 0.0 0.463917525773 0% => OK
Preposition: 2.0 1.44329896907 139% => OK

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 8.0 12.6804123711 63% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 20.0 16.3608247423 122% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively long.
Sentence length SD: 59.9124361047 44.8134815571 134% => OK
Chars per sentence: 95.25 76.5299724578 124% => OK
Words per sentence: 20.125 16.8248392259 120% => OK
Discourse Markers: 6.375 4.34317383033 147% => OK
Paragraphs: 6.0 4.29896907216 140% => Less paragraphs wanted.
Language errors: 3.0 2.54639175258 118% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 5.0 7.41237113402 67% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 1.0 1.49484536082 67% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 2.0 3.94845360825 51% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.246775322641 0.216113520407 114% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0933507331789 0.0766984524023 122% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.049422491394 0.0603063233224 82% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.107105728653 0.12726935374 84% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0664592556354 0.0580467560999 114% => OK

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 10.9 8.37731958763 130% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 59.64 70.7449484536 84% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 3.82989690722 230% => Smog_index is high.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 9.9 7.45979381443 133% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 10.15 8.71597938144 116% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.36 7.59969072165 110% => OK
difficult_words: 38.0 41.2886597938 92% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 10.5 8.62886597938 122% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.0 8.54432989691 117% => OK
text_standard: 10.0 8.15463917526 123% => OK
What are above readability scores?

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Maximum five paragraphs wanted.
Rates: 73.0337078652 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 6.5 Out of 9
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.