In the past, sporting champions used to be motivated primarily by the desire to win a match or to break world records. These days, they are more likely to be motivated by prize money and the opportunity to be famous.
What message does this send to young people and how does this attitude to sport affect the sports themselves? Give reasons for your answers.
The issue of how to reward the sportsmen after their achievement continues to be a definitely controversial one that always opens the door to the endless debates and discussions. Some practitioners argue that it can impact on their behavior seriously; however, to my way of thinking this situation has more drawbacks than the benefits. In this essay I will intend to explore both sides of view and give some viable examples to it.
Today one of the highest sources of income to the government is proceeding to be a sport. Many sportsmen are awarded with money as prize; this activity induces many troubles such as: humanism and egoism. The more they are inspired by giving money, the less they become responsible for their occupation. They begin to consider that they have reached all things that they desired, additionally, they increase their self confidence by having a lot of money. As a result it inflicts a great deal of serious effects.
Another overt reason is they stem the tide of training and eventually it brings them to the repercussion. They never train on their own, consequently they face obesity and physical changing in the light of the fact that the money they have.
Considering the odds, there are a lot of positive aspects to the country. The government makes high profits from athletes and shares it with them with diverse proportions. This situation interests youngsters in order to engage in sports a lot. They attend sports with curiosity and try to do their best so as to achieve high stages.
In conclusion, I am inclined to believe that instead of rewarding sportsmen with money and opportunity, the government should maximize their inspiration by showing them the great ancestors who were the masters of distinct sports.
Grammar and spelling errors:
^^
Line 7, column 304, Rule ID: SO_AS_TO[1]
Message: Use simply 'to'
Suggestion: to
...with curiosity and try to do their best so as to achieve high stages. In conclusion, ...
^^^^^^^^
Discourse Markers used:
['consequently', 'however', 'so', 'as to', 'in conclusion', 'such as', 'as a result']
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance in Part of Speech:
Nouns: 0.2375 0.247107548796 96% => OK
Verbs: 0.153125 0.15552993741 98% => OK
Adjectives: 0.06875 0.0946569551029 73% => OK
Adverbs: 0.034375 0.0501201869031 69% => OK
Pronouns: 0.090625 0.0437536398559 207% => Too many pronouns. Try not to use 'you, I, they...' as the subject of a sentence
Prepositions: 0.125 0.122223957237 102% => OK
Participles: 0.03125 0.0403219363162 78% => OK
Conjunctions: 2.76150469607 2.80592935109 98% => OK
Infinitives: 0.046875 0.0326786765898 143% => OK
Particles: 0.0 0.00163938923432 0% => More particles wanted.
Determiners: 0.1125 0.0861751148067 131% => OK
Modal_auxiliary: 0.009375 0.0214082191602 44% => OK
WH_determiners: 0.009375 0.0119246538136 79% => OK
Vocabulary words and sentences:
No of characters: 1760.0 1933.38276553 91% => OK
No of words: 294.0 316.052104208 93% => OK
Chars per words: 5.96610169492 6.10592293882 98% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.14082457966 4.20519365927 98% => OK
words length more than 5 chars: 0.34693877551 0.37474360046 93% => OK
words length more than 6 chars: 0.268707482993 0.284197041944 95% => OK
words length more than 7 chars: 0.19387755102 0.203843217982 95% => OK
words length more than 8 chars: 0.119047619048 0.137313986986 87% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.76150469607 2.80592935109 98% => OK
Unique words: 175.0 176.041082164 99% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.595238095238 0.560935902166 106% => OK
Word variations: 65.0661621215 60.7401812628 107% => OK
How many sentences: 15.0 16.0911823647 93% => OK
Sentence length: 19.6 20.7725350517 94% => OK
Sentence length SD: 45.0936802668 49.5273876611 91% => OK
Chars per sentence: 85.4368932039 93.4120437189 91% => OK
Words per sentence: 14.2718446602 15.2821509519 93% => OK
Discourse Markers: 0.339805825243 0.594174754866 57% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 4.39078156313 114% => OK
Language errors: 1.0 5.01102204409 20% => OK
Readability: 46.4707482993 49.1922392462 94% => OK
Elegance: 1.41573033708 1.69127372897 84% => OK
Coherence and Cohesion:
Topic essay coherence: 0.424910948412 0.332604825255 128% => OK
Sentence sentence coherence: 0.0972204940066 0.102734651613 95% => OK
Sentence sentence coherence SD: 0.0737607535033 0.0668474354756 110% => OK
Sentence paragraph coherence: 0.562966899406 0.534917948617 105% => OK
Sentence paragraph coherence SD: 0.184393357977 0.148666948902 124% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.179198913676 0.13441755203 133% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0922873213367 0.0742828286743 124% => OK
Paragraph paragraph coherence: 0.334404230088 0.324241079732 103% => OK
Paragraph paragraph coherence SD: 0.0629111196216 0.0640056729886 98% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.285346735696 0.22793763319 125% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0530116826961 0.0582452615562 91% => OK
Task Achievement:
Sentences with positive sentiment : 10.0 8.68436873747 115% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 1.0 3.9879759519 25% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 4.0 3.41883767535 117% => OK
Positive topic words: 5.0 5.88977955912 85% => OK
Negative topic words: 1.0 2.60220440882 38% => More negative topic words wanted.
Neutral topic words: 3.0 2.00200400802 150% => OK
Total topic words: 9.0 10.493987976 86% => OK
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Rates: 77.8876404494 out of 100
Scores by essay E-rater: 7.0 Out of 9