Nowadays, young people admire sports stars though they often do not set a good example. Do you think this is a positive or negative development?

Essay topics:

Nowadays, young people admire sports stars though they often do not set a good example. Do you think this is a positive or negative development?

In the contemporary world, the phenomenon that the youth idolize famous athletes is a heated issue. While some people assert that these people are not outstanding models, to which children should look up, I believe that the trend has some positive effects on children.

On the one hand, several disadvantages can be seen if the youth imitate the actions of their stars. To begin with, extravagant lifestyle of sports stars can instill the wrong concept about the value of money. For example,Bé Heo, who was born with a silver spoon in her mouth, spends her time attending parties and nightclubs and splurges her money on shopping sprees. Thus, the youth may formulate the idea that it is easy to earn money and clamor their parents for exorbitant items. Moreover, some notions of famous athletes that they must become famous at all costs can deviate children from moral standards. In particular, the incidents that famous stars fight or cheat by using banned drugs during competition to create scandals can make the students stimulate these actions, which causes some brawls at schools and later divert them from becoming law-abiding citizens.

However, apart from the bad examples above, most of celebrities still have a beneficial influence on youngsters, both physically and mentally. Many sports stars often display extremely developed skills, which can encourage physical activities in young people. For instance, fervent supporters of footballers like Lionel Messi or Cristiano Ronaldo are likely to be involved in football activities as the way to emulate their idols. Besides that, sport stars who have overcome their deprived childhood to achieve success by relentless effort can be great sources of inspiration for younger generation. Take Ngọc Trinh as an example, though though born in a dysfunctional family, he practiced with all his effort and brought the team to victory at the final round of the national tournament,which inspires children to develop their talents through perseverance.

In conclusion, although the fact is that many sport stars can not maintain good reputation, I still think they bring positive impact and should be venerated. Setting a role model and work hard to achieve your goal can be an exciting activity which convey happiness and inspiration to you

Votes
Average: 8.9 (1 vote)

Comments

Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 3, column 175, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...le of sports stars can instill the wrong concept about the value of money. For ex...
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Line 3, column 222, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma
Suggestion: , Bé
...pt about the value of money. For example,Bé Heo, who was born with a silver spoon i...
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Line 5, column 45, Rule ID: MOST_SOME_OF_NNS[1]
Message: After 'most of', you should use 'the' ('most of the celebrities') or simply say ''most celebrities''.
Suggestion: most of the celebrities; most celebrities
...ver, apart from the bad examples above, most of celebrities still have a beneficial influence on yo...
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Line 5, column 274, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
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...ctivities in young people. For instance, fervent supporters of footballers like L...
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Line 5, column 617, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
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... for younger generation. Take Ngọc Trinh as an example, though though born in a d...
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Line 5, column 634, Rule ID: ENGLISH_WORD_REPEAT_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a word
Suggestion: though
...ration. Take Ngọc Trinh as an example, though though born in a dysfunctional family, he prac...
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Line 5, column 790, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma
Suggestion: , which
...e final round of the national tournament,which inspires children to develop their tal...
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Line 5, column 805, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
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...f the national tournament,which inspires children to develop their talents throug...
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Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
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...hildren to develop their talents through perseverance. In conclusion, although...
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Transition Words or Phrases used:
besides, however, if, look, may, moreover, so, still, thus, while, apart from, for example, for instance, in conclusion, in particular, to begin with

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 11.0 13.1623246493 84% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 12.0 7.85571142285 153% => OK
Conjunction : 11.0 10.4138276553 106% => OK
Relative clauses : 15.0 7.30460921844 205% => Less relative clauses wanted (maybe 'which' is over used).
Pronoun: 28.0 24.0651302605 116% => OK
Preposition: 49.0 41.998997996 117% => OK
Nominalization: 9.0 8.3376753507 108% => OK

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1940.0 1615.20841683 120% => OK
No of words: 367.0 315.596192385 116% => OK
Chars per words: 5.28610354223 5.12529762239 103% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.37689890912 4.20363070211 104% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.70756130019 2.80592935109 96% => OK
Unique words: 234.0 176.041082164 133% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.637602179837 0.561755894193 114% => OK
syllable_count: 578.7 506.74238477 114% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.60771543086 100% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 3.0 5.43587174349 55% => OK
Article: 3.0 2.52805611222 119% => OK
Subordination: 3.0 2.10420841683 143% => OK
Conjunction: 0.0 0.809619238477 0% => OK
Preposition: 8.0 4.76152304609 168% => OK

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 15.0 16.0721442886 93% => OK
Sentence length: 24.0 20.2975951904 118% => OK
Sentence length SD: 49.5340960013 49.4020404114 100% => OK
Chars per sentence: 129.333333333 106.682146367 121% => OK
Words per sentence: 24.4666666667 20.7667163134 118% => OK
Discourse Markers: 9.93333333333 7.06120827912 141% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.38176352705 91% => OK
Language errors: 9.0 5.01903807615 179% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 10.0 8.67935871743 115% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 3.0 3.9879759519 75% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 2.0 3.4128256513 59% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.152289030327 0.244688304435 62% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.047721022514 0.084324248473 57% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0542891585334 0.0667982634062 81% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.0934926380282 0.151304729494 62% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0444155635411 0.056905535591 78% => OK

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 15.7 13.0946893788 120% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 47.12 50.2224549098 94% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.44779559118 118% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 12.7 11.3001002004 112% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 13.7 12.4159519038 110% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 9.6 8.58950901804 112% => OK
difficult_words: 111.0 78.4519038076 141% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 11.0 9.78957915832 112% => OK
gunning_fog: 11.6 10.1190380762 115% => OK
text_standard: 11.0 10.7795591182 102% => OK
What are above readability scores?

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Rates: 89.8876404494 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 8.0 Out of 9
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.