Do you agree or disagree the following statement. Only people with substantial earning are successful. Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.

Essay topics:

Do you agree or disagree the following statement. Only people with substantial earning are successful. Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.

This is the question which conflicts many of people’s mind. In this era, some of the individuals believe that earning more money can make them more prosperous. On the other hand, others believe that emphasizing on just substantial money isn’t a good strategy in human’s lifestyle. They think that our lifestyle should be make balance between material and spiritual aspects of life. In my perspective, only substantial earnings are not sufficient to be considered as a successful person. There are more various aspects of life are exist to make individuals feel successfulness. I will support my perspective throughout two reasons; money isn’t equal to successfulness, higher earnings need more spending of work rather than other parts of life.

First of all, money isn’t equal to successfulness. Most of us think that people with higher incomes have better life, then, they are successful. No, it doesn’t. Individuals with higher incomes have their own problem which money and higher incomes are unable to solve them. For example, in many cases which I observed, they or one their family are suffering from a problem that even money can’t solve it. My cousin’s wife had cancer for several years. They spent a lot of money to cure her. As my cousin stated they had a lot of problem, which caused by cancer, except financial problem due to high income of my cousin. Unfortunately, his wife was died after spending more than 60 thousands dollars. Or some of people with higher incomes are worried about their personal life. They have many problems with their family members and wife. Even they divorced several times. Thus, people with higher incomes maybe consider as a successful person in their business life but they could have many problems in their personal life.

Furthermore, higher incomes need focus most of the daily time business and work and miss other parts of life that can be inevitable to keep family together. Most of rich people spend most of their times on work meetings and office. They miss their chance to be with their children. If you ask them to modify their plan, they say that this is what the family needs, money. For instance, one my friends believe that providing perfect life for his children would make them satisfy about their life. And what is perfect life? Luxurious life. Surprisingly, his son always complain about his father’s absence in family meetings. As my father said to me, being with family is more enjoyable than everything. Thus, higher incomes should be a tool to put family together.

In conclusion, people with higher income would be consider as a successful person if and only if use their money to both material and spiritual aspects of life. Their money should be a way to make them prosper. More money can’t bring prosperity. Balancing money with other dimensions of life style can help people to be regard as a successful person. Thus, we should try to have a multi-dimensional perspective toward successfulness rather than mono-dimensional perspective.

Votes
Average: 7 (1 vote)
Essay Categories

Comments

Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 79, Rule ID: SOME_OF_THE[1]
Message: Simply use 'some'.
Suggestion: some
...any of people's mind. In this era, some of the individuals believe that earning more m...
^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 1, column 337, Rule ID: SHOULD_BE_DO[1]
Message: Did you mean 'made'?
Suggestion: made
...They think that our lifestyle should be make balance between material and spiritual ...
^^^^
Line 1, column 546, Rule ID: BEEN_PART_AGREEMENT[1]
Message: Consider using a past participle here: 'existed'.
Suggestion: existed
...re are more various aspects of life are exist to make individuals feel successfulness...
^^^^^
Line 3, column 540, Rule ID: A_LOT_OF_NN[1]
Message: Possible agreement error. The noun problem seems to be countable; consider using: 'a lot of problems'.
Suggestion: a lot of problems
... cure her. As my cousin stated they had a lot of problem, which caused by cancer, except financi...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 3, column 723, Rule ID: MOST_SOME_OF_NNS[1]
Message: After 'some of', you should use 'the' ('some of the people') or simply say ''some people''.
Suggestion: some of the people; some people
...ding more than 60 thousands dollars. Or some of people with higher incomes are worried about t...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^

Transition Words or Phrases used:
but, first, furthermore, if, may, so, then, thus, for example, for instance, in conclusion, first of all, in many cases, on the other hand

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 21.0 15.1003584229 139% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 15.0 9.8082437276 153% => OK
Conjunction : 12.0 13.8261648746 87% => OK
Relative clauses : 12.0 11.0286738351 109% => OK
Pronoun: 60.0 43.0788530466 139% => OK
Preposition: 66.0 52.1666666667 127% => OK
Nominalization: 4.0 8.0752688172 50% => More nominalization wanted.

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2567.0 1977.66487455 130% => OK
No of words: 501.0 407.700716846 123% => OK
Chars per words: 5.12375249501 4.8611393121 105% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.73107062784 4.48103885553 106% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.83385619137 2.67179642975 106% => OK
Unique words: 228.0 212.727598566 107% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.455089820359 0.524837075471 87% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 791.1 618.680645161 128% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.51630824373 106% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 15.0 9.59856630824 156% => Less pronouns wanted as sentence beginning.
Interrogative: 0.0 0.994623655914 0% => OK
Article: 0.0 3.08781362007 0% => OK
Subordination: 3.0 3.51792114695 85% => OK
Conjunction: 2.0 1.86738351254 107% => OK
Preposition: 6.0 4.94265232975 121% => OK

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 34.0 20.6003584229 165% => OK
Sentence length: 14.0 20.1344086022 70% => OK
Sentence length SD: 41.3876053614 48.9658058833 85% => OK
Chars per sentence: 75.5 100.406767564 75% => OK
Words per sentence: 14.7352941176 20.6045352989 72% => OK
Discourse Markers: 4.05882352941 5.45110844103 74% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 5.0 5.5376344086 90% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 15.0 11.8709677419 126% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 12.0 3.85842293907 311% => Less negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 8.0 4.88709677419 164% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.0833967996933 0.236089414692 35% => The similarity between the topic and the content is low.
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0258763934375 0.076458572812 34% => Sentence topic similarity is low.
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0355192528265 0.0737576698707 48% => Sentences are similar to each other.
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.060323610709 0.150856017488 40% => Maybe some paragraphs are off the topic.
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0187201277345 0.0645574589148 29% => Paragraphs are similar to each other. Some content may get duplicated or it is not exactly right on the topic.

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 10.1 11.7677419355 86% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 57.27 58.1214874552 99% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 6.10430107527 51% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 8.8 10.1575268817 87% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 11.82 10.9000537634 108% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.39 8.01818996416 92% => OK
difficult_words: 97.0 86.8835125448 112% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 7.0 10.002688172 70% => Linsear_write_formula is low.
gunning_fog: 7.6 10.0537634409 76% => Gunning_fog is low.
text_standard: 8.0 10.247311828 78% => The average readability is low. Need to improve the language.
What are above readability scores?

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Try to use less pronouns (like 'It, I, They, We, You...') as the subject of a sentence.
Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:

para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.

So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:

reasons == advantages or

reasons == disadvantages

for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.

or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.

Rates: 70.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 21.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.