Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? The opinions of celebrities, such as famous entertainers and athletes, are more important to younger people than they are to older people. Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.
Today, being a famous person is a passion for many kids. They tend to listen to celebrities more often in order to become like them. In my opinion, I think well-known people have more influence on a young person than an older one.
To begin with, young people do not have enough knowledge and experience in their life. They can not differentiate between the good or wrong view, so they follow what they like the most. For example, I remember when the famous soccer player Missie had an interview on TV, he talked about his religion first, and after that, he spoke indirectly about Muslims people and how they kill some incents in Palestine. Therefore, many children believed him because they do not know anything about history and how Israel started the war against Palestine. On the other hand, older people did not believe Missie and they knew he was not telling the truth because they have a perfect historical background about Palestine history.
Adding to the previous point, kids are prone to mimic famous people. They like to follow their opinion because they see them as an idol. They have a desire to become like them in the future. For instance, when Christiano Ronaldo cut his hair in a weird way in the last World Cup that was held in Russia, many teen fans copied his hairstyle. Furthermore, they wore the same t-shirt and put the same glasses that Ronaldo has showing off.
All in all, I strongly believe that the most famous point of view is significant for the young individual than adults. This is not only because kids do not have enough knowledge, but also, they see celebrities as an ideal figure.
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 3, column 243, Rule ID: IN_A_X_MANNER[1]
Message: Consider replacing "in a weird way" with adverb for "weird"; eg, "in a hasty manner" with "hastily".
...e, when Christiano Ronaldo cut his hair in a weird way in the last World Cup that was held in ...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, first, furthermore, if, so, therefore, well, for example, for instance, i think, in my opinion, to begin with, on the other hand
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 7.0 15.1003584229 46% => More to be verbs wanted.
Auxiliary verbs: 1.0 9.8082437276 10% => OK
Conjunction : 8.0 13.8261648746 58% => More conjunction wanted.
Relative clauses : 6.0 11.0286738351 54% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 34.0 43.0788530466 79% => OK
Preposition: 34.0 52.1666666667 65% => OK
Nominalization: 3.0 8.0752688172 37% => More nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1338.0 1977.66487455 68% => OK
No of words: 285.0 407.700716846 70% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 4.69473684211 4.8611393121 97% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.10876417139 4.48103885553 92% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.33909064152 2.67179642975 88% => OK
Unique words: 166.0 212.727598566 78% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.582456140351 0.524837075471 111% => OK
syllable_count: 415.8 618.680645161 67% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.51630824373 99% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 12.0 9.59856630824 125% => OK
Article: 0.0 3.08781362007 0% => OK
Subordination: 1.0 3.51792114695 28% => OK
Conjunction: 2.0 1.86738351254 107% => OK
Preposition: 3.0 4.94265232975 61% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 15.0 20.6003584229 73% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 19.0 20.1344086022 94% => OK
Sentence length SD: 45.15110433 48.9658058833 92% => OK
Chars per sentence: 89.2 100.406767564 89% => OK
Words per sentence: 19.0 20.6045352989 92% => OK
Discourse Markers: 9.26666666667 5.45110844103 170% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 1.0 5.5376344086 18% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 8.0 11.8709677419 67% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 3.0 3.85842293907 78% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 4.0 4.88709677419 82% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.180553159941 0.236089414692 76% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0657277456826 0.076458572812 86% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.036717406104 0.0737576698707 50% => Sentences are similar to each other.
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.112285481655 0.150856017488 74% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0290790355599 0.0645574589148 45% => Paragraphs are similar to each other. Some content may get duplicated or it is not exactly right on the topic.
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 10.2 11.7677419355 87% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 60.65 58.1214874552 104% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 6.10430107527 51% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 9.5 10.1575268817 94% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 9.92 10.9000537634 91% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.4 8.01818996416 92% => OK
difficult_words: 51.0 86.8835125448 59% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 7.5 10.002688172 75% => OK
gunning_fog: 9.6 10.0537634409 95% => OK
text_standard: 10.0 10.247311828 98% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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We are expecting: No. of Words: 350 while No. of Different Words: 200
Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.
So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:
reasons == advantages or
reasons == disadvantages
for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
Rates: 70.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 21.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.