Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? For success in a future job, the ability to relate well to people is more important than studying hard in school. Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.
It is an undisputable fact that there is not a one-size-fits-all avenue for people to get successful in a career. To be successful, several different yet necessary criteria should be involved some weight more than other. Contrary to many people who believe that social and communicative abilities should be pronounced, I am of the opinion that studying hard in school can pave the way for a successful future job. The reasons, including but not limited to the following, can substantiate my point of view.
To begin with, studying hard in school will make the person enjoy considerable success in the future job as the person will gain more expertise. To be more specific, nowadays with technology development and modernization, more and more job opportunities have resurfaced requiring people to be in charge. It is difficult to deny the obvious that the variety of jobs requires nothing but expertise and knowledge. Having had the necessary knowledge by studying hard in school, the person will surely become successful. To illustrate, my brother who is a good mixer and social climber, with outstanding communication skill dropped out of school since he was sure that the first and the most important ingredient of being successful in job is to relate well. With paltry of knowledge that he possessed, it was no sooner than the time he started the job, that he was being stigmatized because of his lack of knowledge. On the other hand, I overwhelmed myself in all my studies and tried really hard in school, now everyone respects me because there is nothing that I do not know, making me shine in my job.
The next reason in line is that when a person studies hard in school, he or she will be equipped with high level of creativity which is the backbone of being successful. Being knowledge-hungry and trying hard in school will make the person become creative since he or she will be exposed to different problems and to solve such kind of problems, a creative mind will be triggered. When being in workplace, everyone welcomes people with creative mind because he or she will be the rescue to unsolved problems. On the other hand, those people with the ability to relate well to people will not necessarily have such a creative mind to be helpful in problem-solving tasks. As an example, since I have studied really hard in Harvard University, I was exposed to different problems, the answer of which lied behind a creative mind. In the hopes of becoming creative, the professors used to give us different problems and would ask us to think of a creative way to answer such kind of problems. Having been graduated, I am a successful stock marketer, because of the creativity and imagination that I am empowered with. Studying hard in school finally paid off for me.
To recap, having the above-mentioned reasons and examples into account, I believe that studying hard in school is better than the ability to relate will to people. Not only will it provide the person with more knowledge and expertise to rely on, but it also tap the person's creativity. The next time you are sick and tired of studying at school, think about the successful future you might have if you study.
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 133, Rule ID: NUMEROUS_DIFFERENT[1]
Message: Use simply 'several'.
Suggestion: several
...ccessful in a career. To be successful, several different yet necessary criteria should be involv...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 4, column 258, Rule ID: IT_VBZ[1]
Message: Did you mean 'taps'?
Suggestion: taps
...e and expertise to rely on, but it also tap the persons creativity. The next time y...
^^^
Line 4, column 266, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[2]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'persons'' or 'person's'?
Suggestion: persons'; person's
...pertise to rely on, but it also tap the persons creativity. The next time you are sick ...
^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, finally, first, if, really, so, well, kind of, to begin with, on the other hand
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 30.0 15.1003584229 199% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 17.0 9.8082437276 173% => OK
Conjunction : 21.0 13.8261648746 152% => OK
Relative clauses : 17.0 11.0286738351 154% => OK
Pronoun: 49.0 43.0788530466 114% => OK
Preposition: 82.0 52.1666666667 157% => OK
Nominalization: 4.0 8.0752688172 50% => More nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2640.0 1977.66487455 133% => OK
No of words: 547.0 407.700716846 134% => OK
Chars per words: 4.82632541133 4.8611393121 99% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.83611736076 4.48103885553 108% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.85659860854 2.67179642975 107% => OK
Unique words: 241.0 212.727598566 113% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.440585009141 0.524837075471 84% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 830.7 618.680645161 134% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.51630824373 99% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 12.0 9.59856630824 125% => OK
Article: 7.0 3.08781362007 227% => Less articles wanted as sentence beginning.
Subordination: 4.0 3.51792114695 114% => OK
Conjunction: 1.0 1.86738351254 54% => OK
Preposition: 12.0 4.94265232975 243% => Less preposition wanted as sentence beginnings.
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 22.0 20.6003584229 107% => OK
Sentence length: 24.0 20.1344086022 119% => OK
Sentence length SD: 41.7761893906 48.9658058833 85% => OK
Chars per sentence: 120.0 100.406767564 120% => OK
Words per sentence: 24.8636363636 20.6045352989 121% => OK
Discourse Markers: 4.09090909091 5.45110844103 75% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 3.0 5.5376344086 54% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 17.0 11.8709677419 143% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 5.0 3.85842293907 130% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 0.0 4.88709677419 0% => More facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.30275082955 0.236089414692 128% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.100159791922 0.076458572812 131% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0629148554041 0.0737576698707 85% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.207998913234 0.150856017488 138% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0456712452513 0.0645574589148 71% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 13.7 11.7677419355 116% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 55.58 58.1214874552 96% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 6.10430107527 144% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 11.5 10.1575268817 113% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 11.03 10.9000537634 101% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.66 8.01818996416 96% => OK
difficult_words: 98.0 86.8835125448 113% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 11.0 10.002688172 110% => OK
gunning_fog: 11.6 10.0537634409 115% => OK
text_standard: 12.0 10.247311828 117% => OK
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.
So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:
reasons == advantages or
reasons == disadvantages
for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
Rates: 73.3333333333 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 22.0 Out of 30
---------------------
Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.