Do you agree or disagree with the following statement?
Children rely too much on the technology, like computers, smartphones, video games for fun and entertainment. Playing simpler toys or playing outside with friends would be better for children's development.
In today's fast-changing world, teaching to children, which is among the greatest concerns of modern human beings, is inextricably intertwined with the parent's lives. Nowadays, there are number of people who subscribe to the view that the children must be knowledgeable with the thechnology while others are of the opinion that children must do like the past children did. As far as I am concerned, the advantages of the latter idea of the topic substantially outweigh those of the former one because of two monumental reasons, which are elaboreted upon hereunder.
The first exqusite reason coming to mind is that the children must be aware of how work with a team. Scientifically, they must to know what the team working is and do. To illustrate my point, let me provide an personal example. When I was at university, Our professor said to us that you have to work on the course's project in two team (the team had the equal number of member). In our group, there was a person who managed us and assigned the works to the member. After the project I asked him, how do you know to do like this?, He said that when I was chidren my parent forced me to play with my friends.
Another Salient reason which deserves some word here is making strong relationship with the outside people. In this regards, there are many people who have some best friend whom helping them in terrible situations which they encounter in their lives. Moreover, By using this relationship every one can trust to their friends. In contrast, if the parents don not let the children to make this relationship it may make the futuer life of children in bad condition. To give a specific example, today I have two best friends who help me in my educational problem and actually we made this relationship when we were too young.
To sum up, even though there are invariably some exceptions which are excluded form the general rule, it can be concluded that the children must play with their friends instead of playing with mobile and etc.
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 3, column 123, Rule ID: MUST_HAVE_TO[1]
Message: After 'must', the verb is used without 'to'. Probably, you should use 'must' or 'have to' here.
Suggestion: must; have to
... work with a team. Scientifically, they must to know what the team working is and do. T...
^^^^^^^
Line 3, column 208, Rule ID: EN_A_VS_AN
Message: Use 'a' instead of 'an' if the following word doesn't start with a vowel sound, e.g. 'a sentence', 'a university'
Suggestion: a
... To illustrate my point, let me provide an personal example. When I was at univers...
^^
Line 5, column 112, Rule ID: THIS_NNS[1]
Message: Did you mean 'these'?
Suggestion: these
...elationship with the outside people. In this regards, there are many people who have...
^^^^
Line 7, column 201, Rule ID: AND_ETC[1]
Message: Use simply 'etc.'.
Suggestion: etc.
... friends instead of playing with mobile and etc.
^^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
actually, first, if, may, moreover, so, while, in contrast, you know, to sum up
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 18.0 15.1003584229 119% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 8.0 9.8082437276 82% => OK
Conjunction : 4.0 13.8261648746 29% => More conjunction wanted.
Relative clauses : 19.0 11.0286738351 172% => OK
Pronoun: 42.0 43.0788530466 97% => OK
Preposition: 52.0 52.1666666667 100% => OK
Nominalization: 1.0 8.0752688172 12% => More nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1660.0 1977.66487455 84% => OK
No of words: 352.0 407.700716846 86% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 4.71590909091 4.8611393121 97% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.33147354134 4.48103885553 97% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.63842004438 2.67179642975 99% => OK
Unique words: 191.0 212.727598566 90% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.542613636364 0.524837075471 103% => OK
syllable_count: 506.7 618.680645161 82% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.4 1.51630824373 92% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 4.0 9.59856630824 42% => OK
Article: 2.0 3.08781362007 65% => OK
Subordination: 5.0 3.51792114695 142% => OK
Conjunction: 0.0 1.86738351254 0% => OK
Preposition: 9.0 4.94265232975 182% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 15.0 20.6003584229 73% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 23.0 20.1344086022 114% => OK
Sentence length SD: 47.4055786684 48.9658058833 97% => OK
Chars per sentence: 110.666666667 100.406767564 110% => OK
Words per sentence: 23.4666666667 20.6045352989 114% => OK
Discourse Markers: 5.26666666667 5.45110844103 97% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 4.0 5.5376344086 72% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 10.0 11.8709677419 84% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 1.0 3.85842293907 26% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 4.0 4.88709677419 82% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.202121912818 0.236089414692 86% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0649621604362 0.076458572812 85% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.067433583565 0.0737576698707 91% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.136102153891 0.150856017488 90% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0496311191258 0.0645574589148 77% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 12.5 11.7677419355 106% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 65.05 58.1214874552 112% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 6.10430107527 144% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 9.9 10.1575268817 97% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 10.39 10.9000537634 95% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.05 8.01818996416 100% => OK
difficult_words: 73.0 86.8835125448 84% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 14.5 10.002688172 145% => OK
gunning_fog: 11.2 10.0537634409 111% => OK
text_standard: 9.0 10.247311828 88% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.
So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:
reasons == advantages or
reasons == disadvantages
for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
Rates: 83.3333333333 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 25.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.