Nowadays, children rely too much on the technology, like computers, smartphones, video games for fun and entertainment; playing simpler toys or playing outside with friends would be better for the children’s development.
As time passes, the type of entertainments is changing with galloping rates. In the past, children played in the yard with their peers but nowadays, every child has a video game, computer, smartphone, and to name but a few and spends his/her spare times with them. In this regard, there is a long-standing discussion among
psychologists about which one is better for the children's development. Some parents allow their offspring to rely too much on the technology because they do not have any time to play with them. Others, however, advocate the idea that their offspring should be entertained with toys and play with their friends. I personally, concur with the latter. In the following paragraphs, I will delve into the most important reasons.
To begin with, in today's modern world, everyone ought to have some mobility not to suffer from diseases. Children who spend their time immobile using technology are in a danger of gaining weight, hearth diseases, blood pressure, and to name but handful. On the other hand, children who are active and play outside with their friend are healthy and even more happy. For example, I can recall my childhood when I played with my sister and my cousin in our yard. All of us had a bicycle and every day we allocate some hours to play with each other. Now, when I recall those days, I am very satisfied with my childhood. Had I rely on the technology in my childhood, I would have been obese and ill now.
Secondly, children could learn a lot from playing with each other. On the other hand, they may learn bad things from technology. Parents have to care about their children when they use social media. Human beings are very curious about every things and child are not exception. They are willing to know everything that maybe is not suitable for them such as violence. For example, my cousin is an impolite child because his mother does not pay attention to what extent he uses social media.
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 323, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...here is a long-standing discussion among psychologists about which one is better ...
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Line 3, column 1, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: Psychologists
... is a long-standing discussion among psychologists about which one is better for the child...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 623, Rule ID: HAVE_PART_AGREEMENT[4]
Message: Possible agreement error – use past participle here: 'relied'.
Suggestion: relied
...very satisfied with my childhood. Had I rely on the technology in my childhood, I wo...
^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
but, however, may, second, secondly, so, for example, such as, to begin with, on the other hand
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 13.0 15.1003584229 86% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 7.0 9.8082437276 71% => OK
Conjunction : 13.0 13.8261648746 94% => OK
Relative clauses : 8.0 11.0286738351 73% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 39.0 43.0788530466 91% => OK
Preposition: 49.0 52.1666666667 94% => OK
Nominalization: 4.0 8.0752688172 50% => More nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1610.0 1977.66487455 81% => OK
No of words: 338.0 407.700716846 83% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 4.76331360947 4.8611393121 98% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.28774723029 4.48103885553 96% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.48364983613 2.67179642975 93% => OK
Unique words: 192.0 212.727598566 90% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.568047337278 0.524837075471 108% => OK
syllable_count: 487.8 618.680645161 79% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.4 1.51630824373 92% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 8.0 9.59856630824 83% => OK
Article: 1.0 3.08781362007 32% => OK
Subordination: 2.0 3.51792114695 57% => OK
Conjunction: 2.0 1.86738351254 107% => OK
Preposition: 7.0 4.94265232975 142% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 20.0 20.6003584229 97% => OK
Sentence length: 16.0 20.1344086022 79% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively short.
Sentence length SD: 33.8385505009 48.9658058833 69% => OK
Chars per sentence: 80.5 100.406767564 80% => OK
Words per sentence: 16.9 20.6045352989 82% => OK
Discourse Markers: 4.75 5.45110844103 87% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 3.0 5.5376344086 54% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 14.0 11.8709677419 118% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 5.0 3.85842293907 130% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 1.0 4.88709677419 20% => More facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.291341186823 0.236089414692 123% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0806063561471 0.076458572812 105% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0597669757155 0.0737576698707 81% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.178086081489 0.150856017488 118% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0443268139189 0.0645574589148 69% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 9.4 11.7677419355 80% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 72.16 58.1214874552 124% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 6.10430107527 51% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 7.2 10.1575268817 71% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 10.03 10.9000537634 92% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.42 8.01818996416 93% => OK
difficult_words: 64.0 86.8835125448 74% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 11.0 10.002688172 110% => OK
gunning_fog: 8.4 10.0537634409 84% => OK
text_standard: 11.0 10.247311828 107% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.
So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:
reasons == advantages or
reasons == disadvantages
for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
Rates: 66.6666666667 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 20.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.