Do you agree or disagree with the following statement?
One of the best ways that parents can help their teenage children prepare for adult life is to encourage them to take a part-time job.
Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.
The job has a tremendous impact on our lives and well-being. It enhances our success endlessly because it encompasses our core. Therefore, I adamantly agree that the best way for the parents to help their children is to encourage them to take a part-time job, because of a part-time job will affect young people personality.
First and foremost, engaging in a part-time hob has a crucial effect on your skills. Indeed, working in a part-time job when you are young improve your horizon and helps you to be a goal-oriented person. For example, when I was in high school; I used to go with my parents to their pharmacy, they had a private pharmacy, I spent my leisure time with them. I realized that this thing boosts my knowledge because I gained vital information and skills from them, I benefited from their long lives experience. Besides, going with them pushed me to choose my major when I wanted to apply to the university because I found my self in this field, so, I decided to be a pharmacist, and this is helping me a lot to save time in choosing my major. Therefore, when I am working when I was a young, I evolved my tasks and became an oriented individual. As you can see, working as a part-time job is essential in term of benefit.
Second, having a part-time job has a profound implication on youth's personality. The matter of fact, when the new generation is working at this age, this thing will help them to respect the value of money. For instance, if the children are starting to work, they will see how difficult to obtain the money, they will learn to appreciate the financial resources. Also, having money at this age will help them to learn valuable skills such as how to save money, and how to manage their bank account. Moreover, they can help their parents in the expensive tuition of the school nowadays by using the saved money. Hence, being immersed in a part-time job is the foundation of your prosperity.
For the reasons mentioned above, from my perspective, I believe that having a part-time job is crucial for a new era. Not only to improve their skills and being oriented but also to boost their personality and became financially intelligent. Hopefully, all parents follow this trend and encourage their children to have a part-time job to improve the populace.
Comments
Essay evaluation report
flaws:
need to avoid a lot of pronouns as the beginning of a sentence, look:
For example, when
I was in high school;
I used to go with my parents to their pharmacy,
they had a private pharmacy, I spent my leisure time with them.
I realized that this thing boosts my knowledge because
I gained vital information and skills from them,
I benefited from their long lives experience. Besides, going with them pushed me to choose my major when
I wanted to apply to the university because
I found my self in this field, so,
I decided to be a pharmacist, and this is helping me a lot to save time in choosing my major. Therefore, when
I am working when
I was a young,
I evolved my tasks and became an oriented individual. As
you can see, working as a part-time job is essential in term of benefit.
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Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 20 in 30
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 19 15
No. of Words: 405 350
No. of Characters: 1840 1500
No. of Different Words: 187 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.486 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.543 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.615 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 124 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 97 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 64 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 44 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 21.316 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 8.724 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.579 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.351 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.522 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.219 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 4 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 5, column 62, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[2]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'youths'' or 'youth's'?
Suggestion: youths'; youth's
...-time job has a profound implication on youths personality. The matter of fact, when t...
^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, besides, but, first, hence, if, moreover, second, so, therefore, well, for example, for instance, such as
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 15.0 15.1003584229 99% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 7.0 9.8082437276 71% => OK
Conjunction : 11.0 13.8261648746 80% => OK
Relative clauses : 9.0 11.0286738351 82% => OK
Pronoun: 63.0 43.0788530466 146% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 49.0 52.1666666667 94% => OK
Nominalization: 7.0 8.0752688172 87% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1899.0 1977.66487455 96% => OK
No of words: 405.0 407.700716846 99% => OK
Chars per words: 4.68888888889 4.8611393121 96% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.48604634366 4.48103885553 100% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.72663034377 2.67179642975 102% => OK
Unique words: 195.0 212.727598566 92% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.481481481481 0.524837075471 92% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 593.1 618.680645161 96% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.51630824373 99% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 14.0 9.59856630824 146% => OK
Article: 2.0 3.08781362007 65% => OK
Subordination: 6.0 3.51792114695 171% => OK
Conjunction: 2.0 1.86738351254 107% => OK
Preposition: 2.0 4.94265232975 40% => More preposition wanted as sentence beginning.
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 19.0 20.6003584229 92% => OK
Sentence length: 21.0 20.1344086022 104% => OK
Sentence length SD: 42.9163329555 48.9658058833 88% => OK
Chars per sentence: 99.9473684211 100.406767564 100% => OK
Words per sentence: 21.3157894737 20.6045352989 103% => OK
Discourse Markers: 5.84210526316 5.45110844103 107% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 1.0 5.5376344086 18% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 13.0 11.8709677419 110% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 0.0 3.85842293907 0% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 6.0 4.88709677419 123% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.296614863775 0.236089414692 126% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.103870915039 0.076458572812 136% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0887125916538 0.0737576698707 120% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.202772502521 0.150856017488 134% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0473484242636 0.0645574589148 73% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 11.3 11.7677419355 96% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 58.62 58.1214874552 101% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 6.10430107527 51% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 10.3 10.1575268817 101% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 9.92 10.9000537634 91% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.99 8.01818996416 100% => OK
difficult_words: 85.0 86.8835125448 98% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 8.0 10.002688172 80% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.4 10.0537634409 103% => OK
text_standard: 10.0 10.247311828 98% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.
So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:
reasons == advantages or
reasons == disadvantages
for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
Rates: 66.6666666667 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 20.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.