An elementary school intends to extend the science time for children aged 5-11 and reduce music and art time? What is your opinion? 14An elementary school intends to extend the science time for children aged 5-11 and reduce music and art time? What is your opinion?
Nowadays, people pay more attention to children's education due to the importance of it in their future. So, people have different attitudes toward the courses students should pass and their crucial role in their lives. While there are some people maintaining that it is much better students spend most of their time with science courses, there are others holding the view that primary school should pay enough attention to music and art classes. As far as I am Concerned, music and art classes are essential for primary school students in that not only do they help them to have a healthy mind but also they help them to find their special talents.
The first reason which should be stated here is that schools have played an important role in children's health. Most students suffer plenty of pressure and anxiety when they have to do their homework or corporate class discussion. Classes such as music and art help them to release these stresses due to their friendly atmosphere and be entertaining. Therefore, they will help students to boost their mood. Moreover, primary school students cannot talk about their emotions and feeling directly. Without a doubt, their performances in these classes help teachers to become familiar with what happens in their students’ minds. For instance, a painting that contains some black and gray colors shows that the student who painted it is upset. As a result, the teacher can help him or her.
Furthermore, some students have some special talents in music and art. If they pass these courses, they will find their real talents and interests. So, they can continue these fields and become successful. Researches have shown that artist who starts their work form childhoods are much successful. In addition, these classes are entertaining and help students to boosts other skills. For example, when they become prepared for a concert in the school, they have to communicate with other students and play in front of a large number of people. These activities not only help them to develop their social skills but also improve their self-esteem. Therefore, the importance of these classes is undeniable for pupils.
To summarize, it is beneficial for the primary school pupils to spend a great amount of their time with are classes. This is because these classes help them to have a healthier mind and to boost their skills. It is highly recommended that schools provide the necessary facilities for all students to patriciate in art activities.
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 609, Rule ID: HELP_TO_FIND[1]
Message: This phrase is probably grammatically incorrect. Write 'help them find' instead.
Suggestion: help them find
...em to have a healthy mind but also they help them to find their special talents. The first rea...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 520, Rule ID: LARGE_NUMBER_OF[1]
Message: Specify a number, remove phrase, or simply use 'many' or 'numerous'
Suggestion: many; numerous
...ith other students and play in front of a large number of people. These activities not only help ...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 7, column 331, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...udents to patriciate in art activities.
^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, first, furthermore, if, moreover, so, therefore, while, for example, for instance, in addition, such as, as a result
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 15.0 15.1003584229 99% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 8.0 9.8082437276 82% => OK
Conjunction : 18.0 13.8261648746 130% => OK
Relative clauses : 13.0 11.0286738351 118% => OK
Pronoun: 56.0 43.0788530466 130% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 42.0 52.1666666667 81% => OK
Nominalization: 8.0 8.0752688172 99% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2086.0 1977.66487455 105% => OK
No of words: 412.0 407.700716846 101% => OK
Chars per words: 5.06310679612 4.8611393121 104% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.50530610838 4.48103885553 101% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.53693611815 2.67179642975 95% => OK
Unique words: 195.0 212.727598566 92% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.473300970874 0.524837075471 90% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 607.5 618.680645161 98% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.51630824373 99% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 10.0 9.59856630824 104% => OK
Article: 4.0 3.08781362007 130% => OK
Subordination: 5.0 3.51792114695 142% => OK
Conjunction: 0.0 1.86738351254 0% => OK
Preposition: 3.0 4.94265232975 61% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 23.0 20.6003584229 112% => OK
Sentence length: 17.0 20.1344086022 84% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively short.
Sentence length SD: 42.3997538959 48.9658058833 87% => OK
Chars per sentence: 90.6956521739 100.406767564 90% => OK
Words per sentence: 17.9130434783 20.6045352989 87% => OK
Discourse Markers: 5.52173913043 5.45110844103 101% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 3.0 5.5376344086 54% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 20.0 11.8709677419 168% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 2.0 3.85842293907 52% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 1.0 4.88709677419 20% => More facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.126572781762 0.236089414692 54% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0431772334592 0.076458572812 56% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0493304201735 0.0737576698707 67% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.102586241745 0.150856017488 68% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0384806150273 0.0645574589148 60% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 11.4 11.7677419355 97% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 62.68 58.1214874552 108% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 6.10430107527 51% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 8.7 10.1575268817 86% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 11.77 10.9000537634 108% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.66 8.01818996416 96% => OK
difficult_words: 83.0 86.8835125448 96% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 13.0 10.002688172 130% => OK
gunning_fog: 8.8 10.0537634409 88% => OK
text_standard: 9.0 10.247311828 88% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.
So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:
reasons == advantages or
reasons == disadvantages
for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
Rates: 66.6666666667 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 20.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.