Many people believe that the increased presence of violence in films and television these days is responsible for the rising incidents of violent crimes among youths in society. They argue that governments have a dusty to control the media so as to reduce this phenomenon. Do you agree with this argument?
Youth violence is a shared social problem. Many people thus propos that governments need to tackle this issue by controlling the media, whom people see as responsible for inciting this violence through films and television. While youth are undoubtedly swayed by external influences, I disagree that it is a government’s obligation to censor the entertainment industry; rather, it is up to society itself to handle the matter.
Today’s young people may be influenced by many things, from films to websites to their peers. It is unreasonable, then, to single out films and sitcoms as a main influencer of violence. In other words, kids may see violence and kindness, greed and generosity, and all other human behaviours in pretty equal measure everywhere. They can witness all of these things in one news broadcast or viral Youtube clip just as easily as they can in an action flick. Therefore, blaming the entertainment industry is not only unfair, it is also wrong in that it ignores the root causes of certain social behaviours. To suggest that the government can control this is to avoid taking responsibility for ourselves.
Indeed, a government’s role is not to act as parents to its citizens, but maintain order and provide the tools for society to thrive; it should not tell people what they can and cannot do. On the other hand, parents can and must oversee what their children are exposed to, be it online, in a movie, a book, or any other source. Consequently, parents must decide whether they want their children to watch a horror film. It is not for governments to ban studies from making it. Furthermore, once we allow the government to engage in censorship in one area, it will be free to act in all spheres of our lives because negative influences are everywhere and have always been so. Restricting people’s access to media will not stop violence. In fact, it may increase it as citizens begin to fight for their freedoms.
In conclusion, social behavior patterns are impacted by many things, including, but not limited to media products, and society should take care control of this. Governments should not be allowed to restrict what film or TV companies produce because they will then have to spread their control to all areas of society.
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, consequently, furthermore, may, so, then, therefore, thus, while, in conclusion, in fact, in other words, on the other hand
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 18.0 15.1003584229 119% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 18.0 9.8082437276 184% => OK
Conjunction : 15.0 13.8261648746 108% => OK
Relative clauses : 5.0 11.0286738351 45% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 37.0 43.0788530466 86% => OK
Preposition: 50.0 52.1666666667 96% => OK
Nominalization: 12.0 8.0752688172 149% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1900.0 1977.66487455 96% => OK
No of words: 382.0 407.700716846 94% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 4.97382198953 4.8611393121 102% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.42095241839 4.48103885553 99% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.90745198556 2.67179642975 109% => OK
Unique words: 213.0 212.727598566 100% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.557591623037 0.524837075471 106% => OK
syllable_count: 577.8 618.680645161 93% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.51630824373 99% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 9.0 9.59856630824 94% => OK
Article: 2.0 3.08781362007 65% => OK
Subordination: 1.0 3.51792114695 28% => OK
Conjunction: 5.0 1.86738351254 268% => Less conjunction wanted as sentence beginning.
Preposition: 8.0 4.94265232975 162% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 18.0 20.6003584229 87% => OK
Sentence length: 21.0 20.1344086022 104% => OK
Sentence length SD: 49.5883050729 48.9658058833 101% => OK
Chars per sentence: 105.555555556 100.406767564 105% => OK
Words per sentence: 21.2222222222 20.6045352989 103% => OK
Discourse Markers: 7.44444444444 5.45110844103 137% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 0.0 5.5376344086 0% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 7.0 11.8709677419 59% => More positive sentences wanted.
Sentences with negative sentiment : 9.0 3.85842293907 233% => Less negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 2.0 4.88709677419 41% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.251413698677 0.236089414692 106% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0758425144173 0.076458572812 99% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0535903228118 0.0737576698707 73% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.159804412838 0.150856017488 106% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0356025086424 0.0645574589148 55% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 12.6 11.7677419355 107% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 58.62 58.1214874552 101% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 6.10430107527 51% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 10.3 10.1575268817 101% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 11.55 10.9000537634 106% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.65 8.01818996416 108% => OK
difficult_words: 96.0 86.8835125448 110% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 11.5 10.002688172 115% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.4 10.0537634409 103% => OK
text_standard: 12.0 10.247311828 117% => OK
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.
So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:
reasons == advantages or
reasons == disadvantages
for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
Rates: 76.6666666667 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 23.0 Out of 30
---------------------
Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.