People should travel abroad to experience in various countries when they are younger rather than they are older | TOEFL IELTS GMAT GRE SAT ACT PTE ESL

Essay topics:

People should travel abroad to experience in various countries when they are younger rather than they are older.

Travel, part of life, has been valued and even triggers a heated discussion over the topic that which generation of people should travel abroad. Traveling abroad when they are old, in some people’s views, is preferable. Contrary to these people’s opinions is my perspective that traveling abroad when they are young is superior, due to the contribution to their career development and health.

What must be prioritized is that, compared to traveling abroad during older, making a trip abroad during young age is beneficial to students’ career development, including learning more knowledge and coming across more people. To begin with, we can never ignore that traveling abroad when people are at a young age helps people acquire more knowledge. To be more concise, young people can absorb more knowledge like history, geography, and culture, incorporating the knowledge into work and thus facilitating career development; however, elders are incapable of acquiring knowledge when they travel abroad because their capability of absorbing knowledge deteriorates sharply. Moreover, traveling abroad is beneficial for youths to meet more people. In detail, during the trip, young people can not only have deep communication but also come across people with different cultural backgrounds, thus establishing personal networks, which are the key factors in career development; by contrast, those key factors do not play a crucial role in career development when people are old.

What should be equally worth discussing is that going on a trip abroad when people are at a young age, rather than at an older age, is beneficial for people’s health, including physical health and mental health. First of all, never can we ignore that traveling abroad provides people with more opportunities to exercise. To be more specific, traveling abroad excludes people from a sedentary lifestyle, and enable them to have a chance to stretch their cramped muscle; on the contrary, forcing elders to travel and exercise lets them feel tired out, even injuring their body. Furthermore, traveling abroad is a stress-eliminating strategy when people are young. Specifically, traveling abroad can distract people from daily concerts and worries, and allow them to rest and recharge; on the other hand, traveling abroad when people are old increases mental pressure because they have to adapt to a new environment and adjust their diet.

Occupation, the foundation of people’s life, can be improved by traveling abroad when people are at a young age. Health, the requirement for people to live, can be improved by going on a journey abroad when people are young. Thus, only when people are young can traveling abroad maximize its benefits.

Votes

Essay Categories

Independent TOEFL Writing

Comments

Essay evaluations by e-grader

Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 5, column 937, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
... new environment and adjust their diet. Occupation, the foundation of people’s l...
^^^^^
Line 7, column 303, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...traveling abroad maximize its benefits.
^^^

Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, first, furthermore, however, if, moreover, so, thus, first of all, on the contrary, to begin with, on the other hand

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 28.0 15.1003584229 185% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 11.0 9.8082437276 112% => OK
Conjunction : 13.0 13.8261648746 94% => OK
Relative clauses : 19.0 11.0286738351 172% => OK
Pronoun: 24.0 43.0788530466 56% => OK
Preposition: 52.0 52.1666666667 100% => OK
Nominalization: 11.0 8.0752688172 136% => OK

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2306.0 1977.66487455 117% => OK
No of words: 428.0 407.700716846 105% => OK
Chars per words: 5.38785046729 4.8611393121 111% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.548423998 4.48103885553 102% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.83668338803 2.67179642975 106% => OK
Unique words: 204.0 212.727598566 96% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.476635514019 0.524837075471 91% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 710.1 618.680645161 115% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.7 1.51630824373 112% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 2.0 9.59856630824 21% => OK
Article: 2.0 3.08781362007 65% => OK
Subordination: 0.0 3.51792114695 0% => More adverbial clause wanted.
Conjunction: 3.0 1.86738351254 161% => OK
Preposition: 9.0 4.94265232975 182% => OK

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 16.0 20.6003584229 78% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 26.0 20.1344086022 129% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively long.
Sentence length SD: 86.357541651 48.9658058833 176% => OK
Chars per sentence: 144.125 100.406767564 144% => OK
Words per sentence: 26.75 20.6045352989 130% => OK
Discourse Markers: 7.9375 5.45110844103 146% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 2.0 5.5376344086 36% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 11.0 11.8709677419 93% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 3.0 3.85842293907 78% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 2.0 4.88709677419 41% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.35182338284 0.236089414692 149% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.164724794669 0.076458572812 215% => Sentence topic similarity is high.
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0665018043058 0.0737576698707 90% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.270259578575 0.150856017488 179% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0693915961257 0.0645574589148 107% => OK

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 17.3 11.7677419355 147% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 36.63 58.1214874552 63% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 6.10430107527 144% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 14.6 10.1575268817 144% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 14.28 10.9000537634 131% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.65 8.01818996416 108% => OK
difficult_words: 101.0 86.8835125448 116% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 11.5 10.002688172 115% => OK
gunning_fog: 12.4 10.0537634409 123% => OK
text_standard: 12.0 10.247311828 117% => OK
What are above readability scores?

---------------------
Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:

para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.

So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:

reasons == advantages or

reasons == disadvantages

for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.

or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.

Rates: 73.3333333333 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 22.0 Out of 30
---------------------
Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.