Should advertisement be directed towards young children? Do you agree or disagree
Advertising is an integral part of a business organization that wants to make profit and continue to survive in this harsh economic condition. Television as a means to advertise has been the new trend in modern day society. Some people today feel television advertising directed toward young children should be supported because they feel this might help this product move in the market, while some feel it is a wrong idea. In my view I think television advertising shouldn’t be directed toward young children for two important reasons which I’ll discuss in this essay.
The main reason is that these advertisements are encouraging these young ones to stick to watching television. Many young ones today often love to spend their time watching television. This companies directing this advertising towards their age group would help to further increase the time they spend watching this television and this often affect their studies negatively. My brother demonstrates this to be a reality. My brother Deji is five years of age. He likes spending most of his time watching television because of this adverts from companies directed towards their age group. From seeing this products, he often pesters my parents until they get him this product. Most of the video games he plays are from this advert. With time his grades in school starts suffering from his watch of this television adverts. In time the teacher alerted my parent that my brother often come to school to discuss the new products he saw from this advert and imploring his friend to try to tell their parents to purchase such item for them. As you can see, this advertisement directed towards these young ones is causing more harm than good.
Another reason is that these young ones aren’t the ones paying for this product. Most times after seeing the products many of the young ones would beg their parents to get the products for them and if they don’t they start displaying an obstinate character. For instance, my brother Deji, when he asks both parents to get him the products he saw in any of the advertisement and my parent didn’t oblige. He tries calling different uncles and aunties he has. If they also refuse him. He often become obstinate and negligent towards his chores at home, telling my parent that if they didn’t buy him this product he will continue to behave like that. This experience has taught me that advertisement shouldn’t be directed towards these young ones because they are not the one paying for this items.
In sum, though some feel advertisement should be directed towards this young one. In my view advertisement should not be directed towards them. Not only do these advert encourage them to spend most of their time watching television and thereby affecting their studies, these young ones aren’t the one paying for these advertised product.
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Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 3, column 526, Rule ID: THIS_NNS[1]
Message: Did you mean 'these'?
Suggestion: these
...his time watching television because of this adverts from companies directed towards...
^^^^
Line 3, column 600, Rule ID: THIS_NNS[1]
Message: Did you mean 'these'?
Suggestion: these
...ed towards their age group. From seeing this products, he often pesters my parents u...
^^^^
Line 5, column 473, Rule ID: SENTENCE_FRAGMENT[1]
Message: “If” at the beginning of a sentence requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
...ng different uncles and aunties he has. If they also refuse him. He often become o...
^^
Line 5, column 809, Rule ID: THIS_NNS[1]
Message: Did you mean 'these'?
Suggestion: these
...because they are not the one paying for this items. In sum, though some feel adve...
^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, if, so, while, for instance, i think, in my view
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 16.0 15.1003584229 106% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 8.0 9.8082437276 82% => OK
Conjunction : 8.0 13.8261648746 58% => More conjunction wanted.
Relative clauses : 9.0 11.0286738351 82% => OK
Pronoun: 90.0 43.0788530466 209% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 48.0 52.1666666667 92% => OK
Nominalization: 9.0 8.0752688172 111% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2414.0 1977.66487455 122% => OK
No of words: 478.0 407.700716846 117% => OK
Chars per words: 5.05020920502 4.8611393121 104% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.67581127817 4.48103885553 104% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.64012757829 2.67179642975 99% => OK
Unique words: 211.0 212.727598566 99% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.441422594142 0.524837075471 84% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 723.6 618.680645161 117% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.51630824373 99% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 11.0 9.59856630824 115% => OK
Article: 1.0 3.08781362007 32% => OK
Subordination: 5.0 3.51792114695 142% => OK
Conjunction: 0.0 1.86738351254 0% => OK
Preposition: 6.0 4.94265232975 121% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 25.0 20.6003584229 121% => OK
Sentence length: 19.0 20.1344086022 94% => OK
Sentence length SD: 55.6886487536 48.9658058833 114% => OK
Chars per sentence: 96.56 100.406767564 96% => OK
Words per sentence: 19.12 20.6045352989 93% => OK
Discourse Markers: 2.16 5.45110844103 40% => More transition words/phrases wanted.
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 4.0 5.5376344086 72% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 10.0 11.8709677419 84% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 5.0 3.85842293907 130% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 10.0 4.88709677419 205% => Less facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.229561544709 0.236089414692 97% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0915515513438 0.076458572812 120% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.109013694334 0.0737576698707 148% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.199220586307 0.150856017488 132% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.098879802089 0.0645574589148 153% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 11.9 11.7677419355 101% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 60.65 58.1214874552 104% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 6.10430107527 144% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 9.5 10.1575268817 94% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 12.01 10.9000537634 110% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.32 8.01818996416 91% => OK
difficult_words: 83.0 86.8835125448 96% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 12.0 10.002688172 120% => OK
gunning_fog: 9.6 10.0537634409 95% => OK
text_standard: 12.0 10.247311828 117% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.
So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:
reasons == advantages or
reasons == disadvantages
for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
Rates: 70.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 21.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.