Some parent offer their school-age children money for each high grade (mark) they get in school Do you think this is a good idea?Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.

Awards definitely plays a critical role for children's motivation to do stuff. By motivation good values can be grown from the inside out. No matter what age kids are or what they have to do, motivation lead children to achievements. Some people believe that parents offering money to children for being successful in getting high grade is a good idea, other disagree. In my view, I definitely disagree with the statement and think offering money can be also harmful for children. In the following paragraphs I will delve in the most conspicuous reasons and examples justifying my point of view.

First of all, offering money after a while become like a habit and not a motivation for studying better anymore. Though children are likely to become enthusiastic, when parents repeat offering money, children may gradually think its parents duty and lose their motivation to study more. Gradually children will seek only for money during their study. For example, when I was child, I used to go pool and study swimming with my father. After pool my father always bought me an ice-cream as a gift for my efforts. Eventually, I understood how to swim but I expected my father to give me an ice-cream. By repeatedly giving me a too much gift it became like a habit for me. Like everybody say, too much of anything is good for nothing. This example clearly indicate that offering money is not a good idea.

Secondly, providing bonus is a double-edged sword. It is probable that by this method, the value of science and education in children' mind be replaced by money. Though motivations is good, it could happen in many ways not just money. Therefore, parent should offer different kind of gift for high grade. It will increase children motivation twice. One with the gift itself and second with its surprising feeling. For instance, there are several imaginations in every children such as throwing a costume party, owning a PlayStation or bicycle. Parents have to understand their child’s wishes and imagination and every semester after children getting a high grade, make one of their wishes into reality. Buying a bicycle could be more appealing than money for a child who wishes to have a bicycle. In this way giving gifts not only makes children feel better but also helps them to realize the value of family and parents. By this example, it is now obvious that giving money is not a good answer for getting high grade in school.

To sum up, based on the arguments explored above, replacement of motivation with habit and other type of gifts instead of money, I should reinforce my perspective that it is not good for parents to give their children money as a reward for getting high mark in school.

Votes
Average: 7 (1 vote)
Essay Categories

Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 3, column 114, Rule ID: SENT_START_CONJUNCTIVE_LINKING_ADVERB_COMMA[1]
Message: Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Suggestion: Also,
...motivation for studying better anymore. Also children are likely to become enthusias...
^^^^
Line 3, column 600, Rule ID: ENGLISH_WORD_REPEAT_BEGINNING_RULE
Message: Three successive sentences begin with the same word. Reword the sentence or use a thesaurus to find a synonym.
...cted my father to give me an ice-cream. After repeatedly giving me a too much gift it...
^^^^^
Line 5, column 162, Rule ID: SENT_START_CONJUNCTIVE_LINKING_ADVERB_COMMA[1]
Message: Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Suggestion: Also,
... in children mind be replaced by money. Also motivations is good, it could happen in...
^^^^
Line 5, column 233, Rule ID: SENT_START_CONJUNCTIVE_LINKING_ADVERB_COMMA[1]
Message: Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Suggestion: Therefore,
...uld happen in many ways not just money. Therefore parent should offer different kind of g...
^^^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 435, Rule ID: MANY_NN[1]
Message: Possible agreement error. The noun imagination seems to be countable; consider using: 'several imaginations'.
Suggestion: several imaginations
...rising feeling. For instance, there are several imagination in every children such as throwing a co...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^

Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, first, if, may, second, secondly, so, therefore, thus, while, for example, for instance, kind of, such as, first of all, in my view, to sum up

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 18.0 15.1003584229 119% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 10.0 9.8082437276 102% => OK
Conjunction : 15.0 13.8261648746 108% => OK
Relative clauses : 8.0 11.0286738351 73% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 43.0 43.0788530466 100% => OK
Preposition: 59.0 52.1666666667 113% => OK
Nominalization: 15.0 8.0752688172 186% => OK

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2246.0 1977.66487455 114% => OK
No of words: 467.0 407.700716846 115% => OK
Chars per words: 4.80942184154 4.8611393121 99% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.64867537961 4.48103885553 104% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.58900767049 2.67179642975 97% => OK
Unique words: 232.0 212.727598566 109% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.496788008565 0.524837075471 95% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 711.9 618.680645161 115% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.51630824373 99% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 9.0 9.59856630824 94% => OK
Article: 1.0 3.08781362007 32% => OK
Subordination: 5.0 3.51792114695 142% => OK
Conjunction: 0.0 1.86738351254 0% => OK
Preposition: 10.0 4.94265232975 202% => Less preposition wanted as sentence beginnings.

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 27.0 20.6003584229 131% => OK
Sentence length: 17.0 20.1344086022 84% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively short.
Sentence length SD: 45.9472172869 48.9658058833 94% => OK
Chars per sentence: 83.1851851852 100.406767564 83% => OK
Words per sentence: 17.2962962963 20.6045352989 84% => OK
Discourse Markers: 5.66666666667 5.45110844103 104% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 5.0 5.5376344086 90% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 22.0 11.8709677419 185% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 1.0 3.85842293907 26% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 4.0 4.88709677419 82% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.375099194919 0.236089414692 159% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.10433884938 0.076458572812 136% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0933636957119 0.0737576698707 127% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.243261149332 0.150856017488 161% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.036632742 0.0645574589148 57% => OK

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 9.9 11.7677419355 84% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 62.68 58.1214874552 108% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 6.10430107527 51% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 8.7 10.1575268817 86% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 10.32 10.9000537634 95% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.32 8.01818996416 91% => OK
difficult_words: 84.0 86.8835125448 97% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 8.5 10.002688172 85% => OK
gunning_fog: 8.8 10.0537634409 88% => OK
text_standard: 9.0 10.247311828 88% => OK
What are above readability scores?

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Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:

para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.

So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:

reasons == advantages or

reasons == disadvantages

for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.

or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.


Rates: 70.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 21.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.