TPO 54 Do you agree or disagree with the following statement Governments should spend more money in support of the arts than in support of athletics such as state sponsored Olympic teams Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer

On the whole, it is of a little doubt, if any, the government’s policy about the budget is an issue of great importance and consideration. The amount of budget in each society aspects can affect both people's quality of life and the level of performance in daily tasks, both social and professional. Consequently, allocating priority in aspects should have great attention. In this regard, some people wonder governments spend more money on supporting art or athletics. I believe that art-related issues are more significant and should receive more budget. In the ensuing lines, I will provide two reasons for the collaboration with this thesis.
The first idea worthy of consideration is that supporting art affects positively society's culture. Artists have a crazy ability to capture feelings, and individuals are keepers and preservers of those feelings. Enhancing the level of movies, performing concerts, improving the visual scenery of cities are ways which lead encourage people to enjoy their life and understand the value of art. Moreover, art is a great way of communication; it allows people from a different level of society and different locations to communicate with each other via images, sounds, and stories. Taking Esfahan, a historical city in Iran, as an example. In that city, there is a long time existence of respect for art and traditions. In this city, people are interested in communicating with art such as music festivals which happen every night in public places. Local government is aware of that and allocation great money on these performances, not only keeps people enthusiastic about this ancient culture but also makes Esfahan a good destiny for tourist which is a noticeable way for earning that funding back. This indicates that funding for art is noteworthy.
The second reason is that compared with supporting athletics, improving art can benefit more people. Although achievement in sports champions such as Olympic does serve as one important role in the happiness of society, not everyone can be proficient or even interested in the sporting event. We should not ignore the sobering fact that there are still a large number of people live in an environment that includes visual factors. Increase the quality of objects used and seen by people is the best way to provide a more convenient way to relax and getting away from hustle and bustle of a hectic life for all of the society members. For example, I majored in architecture. Once, I remember one of our professors tell us about the feeling of people in lower-income buildings which are numerous. According to him, having cultural resources such as art in lower-income neighborhoods is related to a variety of better health outcomes. Additionally, those neighborhoods also had lower crime rates and better academic outcomes for their kids. The number of people who comforted from this is way much that beneficiary from sports. This shows that supporting art is advantageous.
To sum up, by and large, allocating more budget on supporting art by the government is better because more people can enjoy it and art is the foundation of culture which is an important factor for society. I think people should get more involved in art more than before.

Average: 8.2 (2 votes)
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Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 3, column 353, Rule ID: LARGE_NUMBER_OF[1]
Message: Specify a number, remove phrase, or simply use 'many' or 'numerous'
Suggestion: many; numerous
... the sobering fact that there are still a large number of people live in an environment that incl...
Line 3, column 606, Rule ID: ALL_OF_THE[1]
Message: Simply use 'all the'.
Suggestion: all the
... hustle and bustle of a hectic life for all of the society members. For example, I majored...
Line 3, column 674, Rule ID: SENTENCE_FRAGMENT[1]
Message: “Once” at the beginning of a sentence requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
...For example, I majored in architecture. Once, I remember one of our professors tell ...

Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, consequently, first, if, moreover, second, so, still, thus, for example, i think, such as, by and large, on the whole, to sum up

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 23.0 15.1003584229 152% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 9.0 9.8082437276 92% => OK
Conjunction : 20.0 13.8261648746 145% => OK
Relative clauses : 17.0 11.0286738351 154% => OK
Pronoun: 35.0 43.0788530466 81% => OK
Preposition: 70.0 52.1666666667 134% => OK
Nominalization: 14.0 8.0752688172 173% => OK

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2717.0 1977.66487455 137% => OK
No of words: 531.0 407.700716846 130% => OK
Chars per words: 5.11676082863 4.8611393121 105% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.80035803286 4.48103885553 107% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.91127701369 2.67179642975 109% => OK
Unique words: 275.0 212.727598566 129% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.517890772128 0.524837075471 99% => OK
syllable_count: 867.6 618.680645161 140% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.51630824373 106% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 11.0 9.59856630824 115% => OK
Article: 6.0 3.08781362007 194% => OK
Subordination: 3.0 3.51792114695 85% => OK
Conjunction: 2.0 1.86738351254 107% => OK
Preposition: 8.0 4.94265232975 162% => OK

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 27.0 20.6003584229 131% => OK
Sentence length: 19.0 20.1344086022 94% => OK
Sentence length SD: 54.3234483169 48.9658058833 111% => OK
Chars per sentence: 100.62962963 100.406767564 100% => OK
Words per sentence: 19.6666666667 20.6045352989 95% => OK
Discourse Markers: 5.14814814815 5.45110844103 94% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 3.0 5.5376344086 54% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 19.0 11.8709677419 160% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 2.0 3.85842293907 52% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 6.0 4.88709677419 123% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.18981994831 0.236089414692 80% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0601560661833 0.076458572812 79% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0686846176216 0.0737576698707 93% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.141615256725 0.150856017488 94% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0373654415573 0.0645574589148 58% => OK

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 12.5 11.7677419355 106% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 52.19 58.1214874552 90% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 6.10430107527 144% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 10.7 10.1575268817 105% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 12.42 10.9000537634 114% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.89 8.01818996416 111% => OK
difficult_words: 145.0 86.8835125448 167% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 8.5 10.002688172 85% => OK
gunning_fog: 9.6 10.0537634409 95% => OK
text_standard: 9.0 10.247311828 88% => OK
What are above readability scores?

Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:

para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.

So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:

reasons == advantages or

reasons == disadvantages

for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.

or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.

Rates: 73.3333333333 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 22.0 Out of 30
Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.