Some parents offer their school - age children money for each high grade they get in school. Do you think this is a good idea.
Some parents think that by offering their children money as rewards, they will encourage them. They believe that money will promote children to do more. Although I understand their point of view, I have a different opinion. I believe that money will danger the children more than benefit them. The basis of my opinion is financial and educational.
From the financial perspective, money is the worst kinds of rewards especially at young age because If parents offer their children with huge amount of money, they would not know how to spend it. For instance, children at young age do not understand the meaning or the value of the money. Some children just take the money and waste it on unimportant things such as buying unnecessary toys or candy or even they may lose lost the money. Others children want to try something new and if they have the money they will buy anything new such as buying cigarette or alcohol. That for sure will danger their health and leads to serious problems. That is why I think that parents should give their children something else rather than money.
Educationally, the best reward parents can give to children is to teach them the meaning of the money. To teach them how to save money. If parents want to encourage their children, they will reward them by giving them points. Personally, I tried this method with my children. It is perfect. For example, every time my son gets high grade in a test, I give him some points. Then at the end of the month we transfer the points to money. For instance, if he earns 20 points during the month , I will give him 20 dollars to spend. But he has to tell me on what he will spend his money, and I have to agree or disagree. That way I teach my son the value of the money. Also I limit my son from spending money on unnecessary stuff.
In conclusion for the reasons I mentioned above, I do not encourage the parents to offer money to their children as rewards. Children do not understand the meaning of the money. Children need to learn what money mean before they spend it.
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 1, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
Some parents think that by offering th...
^^
Line 1, column 21, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
Some parents think that by offering their children money a...
^^
Line 1, column 27, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
Some parents think that by offering their children money as rewa...
^^
Line 1, column 73, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...ffering their children money as rewards, they will encourage them. They believe t...
^^
Line 2, column 1, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
... opinion is financial and educational. From the financial perspective, money is...
^^^^^^^^^
Line 4, column 71, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...ive, money is the worst kinds of rewards especially at young age because If paren...
^^
Line 4, column 232, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...pend it. For instance, children at young age do not understand the meaning or the...
^^
Line 4, column 344, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...dren just take the money and waste it on unimportant things such as buying unnec...
^^
Line 4, column 372, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
... waste it on unimportant things such as buying unnecessary toys or candy or even...
^^
Line 4, column 428, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...sary toys or candy or even they may lose lost the money. Others children want to ...
^^
Line 4, column 487, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...thers children want to try something new and if they have the money they will buy...
^^
Line 4, column 550, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...money they will buy anything new such as buying cigarette or alcohol. That for s...
^^
Line 4, column 580, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...ew such as buying cigarette or alcohol. That for sure will danger their health a...
^^
Line 4, column 696, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
... is why I think that parents should give their children something else rather tha...
^^
Line 5, column 1, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...ren something else rather than money. Educationally, the best reward parents c...
^^^^^^
Line 7, column 488, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma, but not before the comma
Suggestion: ,
..., if he earns 20 points during the month , I will give him 20 dollars to spend. Bu...
^^
Line 7, column 664, Rule ID: SENT_START_CONJUNCTIVE_LINKING_ADVERB_COMMA[1]
Message: Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Suggestion: Also,
... I teach my son the value of the money. Also I limit my son from spending money on u...
^^^^
Line 8, column 1, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
... spending money on unnecessary stuff. In conclusion for the reasons I mentione...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 11, column 182, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...not understand the meaning of the money. Children need to learn what money mean b...
^^
Line 12, column 1, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...what money mean before they spend it.
^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, if, may, so, then, as to, for example, for instance, i think, in conclusion, such as
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 5.0 15.1003584229 33% => More to be verbs wanted.
Auxiliary verbs: 13.0 9.8082437276 133% => OK
Conjunction : 11.0 13.8261648746 80% => OK
Relative clauses : 7.0 11.0286738351 63% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 58.0 43.0788530466 135% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 42.0 52.1666666667 81% => OK
Nominalization: 2.0 8.0752688172 25% => More nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1752.0 1977.66487455 89% => OK
No of words: 382.0 407.700716846 94% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 4.58638743455 4.8611393121 94% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.42095241839 4.48103885553 99% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.42683922766 2.67179642975 91% => OK
Unique words: 178.0 212.727598566 84% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.465968586387 0.524837075471 89% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 504.0 618.680645161 81% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.3 1.51630824373 86% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 12.0 9.59856630824 125% => OK
Article: 2.0 3.08781362007 65% => OK
Subordination: 3.0 3.51792114695 85% => OK
Conjunction: 2.0 1.86738351254 107% => OK
Preposition: 1.0 4.94265232975 20% => More preposition wanted as sentence beginning.
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 23.0 20.6003584229 112% => OK
Sentence length: 16.0 20.1344086022 79% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively short.
Sentence length SD: 48.4808149064 48.9658058833 99% => OK
Chars per sentence: 76.1739130435 100.406767564 76% => OK
Words per sentence: 16.6086956522 20.6045352989 81% => OK
Discourse Markers: 4.13043478261 5.45110844103 76% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 20.0 5.5376344086 361% => Less language errors wanted.
Sentences with positive sentiment : 9.0 11.8709677419 76% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 5.0 3.85842293907 130% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 9.0 4.88709677419 184% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.338913315251 0.236089414692 144% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.111972944734 0.076458572812 146% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0838740437898 0.0737576698707 114% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.24414223253 0.150856017488 162% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0445203376213 0.0645574589148 69% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 8.5 11.7677419355 72% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 80.62 58.1214874552 139% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 6.10430107527 51% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 6.0 10.1575268817 59% => Flesch kincaid grade is low.
coleman_liau_index: 9.05 10.9000537634 83% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 6.33 8.01818996416 79% => OK
difficult_words: 46.0 86.8835125448 53% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 6.5 10.002688172 65% => OK
gunning_fog: 8.4 10.0537634409 84% => OK
text_standard: 9.0 10.247311828 88% => OK
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
We are expecting: No. of Words: 350 while No. of Different Words: 200
Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.
So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:
reasons == advantages or
reasons == disadvantages
for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
Rates: 60.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 18.0 Out of 30
---------------------
Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.