TOPIC 43 why do you think some people are attracted to dangerous sports or other dangerous activities

People like to try new things to make a change in their lives. They can do that through many ways which most of them safe. Some people do that through participating in dangerous sports or activities even if they expose their lives to danger and that because of following reasons.

To begin with, individuals frequently try to challenge themselves. Some are afraid or having phobia of a particular thing. They feel some safe issues are really dangerous to them and they cannot even try what they are afraid of. For example, my friend gets panic if he found himself in a high place; he even cannot breathe. So he decided to do skydiving to overcome his fear. After trying this sport and finding how amazing it is, he is not scare of high places any more. Therefore, to face our fears, people should challenge themselves.

Another reason is that people want to prove to others that they are courageous and strong. Some people feel that they are failures or do not have enough skills and abilities. And to gain respect and trust of others they engage in such dangerous sports. For instance they may participate in car race to prove to their parents or friends that they are smart because they can drive a speedy car very well and they have a quick reaction while driving. And all that to gain respect and to feel more confident in front of others. Thus, people involve in such dangerous activities to show their strength and intelligence.

Finally, when people play risky sports, they look for excitement . Our lives sometimes become tedious. Work, study, family, and all other responsibilities make life hectic and boring. As a result, we search for some entertainments that are not casual like soccer, watching movies, or other ordinary things. We need something new and challenging like climbing high mountains, riding roller coaster in an amusement park to feel of thrill and excitement. Accordingly, to add joy to life, people try to do something unique and special.

To sum up, although risky activities and sports can hurt people, some of people engage in such activities to prove something to themselves or others and to add enjoyment to their lives.

Average: 7.8 (4 votes)
Essay Categories

They can do that through many ways which most of them safe.
Description: what is the verb for 'which'? can you re-write this sentence?

Avg. Sentence Length: 16.087 21.0

More sentences varieties wanted. Try to use less pronouns (like 'It, I, They, We, You...') as the subject of a sentence.


Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 22 in 30
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 1 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 23 15
No. of Words: 370 350
No. of Characters: 1737 1500
No. of Different Words: 190 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.386 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.695 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.483 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 124 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 69 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 47 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 38 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 16.087 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 7.277 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.522 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.276 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.483 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.121 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5

The sentence can be rewrite as following
"They can do that through many ways which most of them are safe." so the verb is ( are).
Other issue is that can I know what are the seven grammatical errors in this essay?

And thanks in advance for all of the efforts that you spend in helping us.