TPO-10 - Independent Writing Task Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Playing computer games is a waste of time. Children should not be allowed to play them.Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.

I totally disagree with the statement above. Although I admit to save time and use it for valuable things and doing better work instead of computer game for children that are useful for their future, playing computer game is inevitable these days especially in teen and young age range.
First, all of us do some work in our life that maybe most of them can be named waste of time from the beginning years of our life up to adult years. For better saying, doing any work without any purpose and use time more than usual can be waste of time. But those works can be done all with applying control and limitation and after that enjoy them without any concern about wasting the worth time. For example computer playing can be waste of time but those games with time limitation not only are not waste of time, but they also are enjoyable and exciting hobbies. So it is an important duty of all parents to teach their children to recognize any work that may waste their time and also the ways for optimize that and how have a good and logical planning for playing such computer games.
Second, these days are the technology age and most of hobbies are in the computer game category. So it is impossible to don’t let children playing such games. It is obvious prohibit children to play computer game is pretty ridiculous. I think nobody could make others to not to do some works or activities and also limiting children doesn’t work these days at all. But the solution is altering some work or game such as computer game to useful activity for children. If parents can find the way, they all will be satisfied. For example if children play computer game, it can help them to increase their creativity or release their exciting emotion or it may help children’s mind to process faster than before.
all of all, even though playing computer may waste children’s time, obviously it is unavoidable and it can have benefits for them with optimizing and controlling it in a best way.

Votes
Average: 6.6 (1 vote)
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Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 58, Rule ID: ADMIT_ENJOY_VB[1]
Message: This verb is used with the gerund form: 'admit saving'.
Suggestion: admit saving
...ee with the statement above. Although I admit to save time and use it for valuable things and...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 3, column 48, Rule ID: MOST_SOME_OF_NNS[1]
Message: After 'most of', you should use 'the' ('most of the hobbies') or simply say ''most hobbies''.
Suggestion: most of the hobbies; most hobbies
..., these days are the technology age and most of hobbies are in the computer game category. So i...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 4, column 1, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: All
...;s mind to process faster than before. all of all, even though playing computer ma...
^^^
Line 4, column 45, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...of all, even though playing computer may waste children's time, obviously it...
^^
Line 4, column 175, Rule ID: THE_SUPERLATIVE[1]
Message: Use 'the' with the superlative.
Suggestion: the
...m with optimizing and controlling it in a best way.
^

Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, first, if, may, second, so, for example, i think, such as

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 17.0 15.1003584229 113% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 12.0 9.8082437276 122% => OK
Conjunction : 22.0 13.8261648746 159% => OK
Relative clauses : 5.0 11.0286738351 45% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 36.0 43.0788530466 84% => OK
Preposition: 39.0 52.1666666667 75% => OK
Nominalization: 5.0 8.0752688172 62% => OK

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1644.0 1977.66487455 83% => OK
No of words: 353.0 407.700716846 87% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 4.65722379603 4.8611393121 96% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.33454660006 4.48103885553 97% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.44709364351 2.67179642975 92% => OK
Unique words: 165.0 212.727598566 78% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.467422096317 0.524837075471 89% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 527.4 618.680645161 85% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.51630824373 99% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 6.0 9.59856630824 63% => OK
Article: 0.0 3.08781362007 0% => OK
Subordination: 3.0 3.51792114695 85% => OK
Conjunction: 3.0 1.86738351254 161% => OK
Preposition: 0.0 4.94265232975 0% => More preposition wanted as sentence beginning.

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 15.0 20.6003584229 73% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 23.0 20.1344086022 114% => OK
Sentence length SD: 58.9911481119 48.9658058833 120% => OK
Chars per sentence: 109.6 100.406767564 109% => OK
Words per sentence: 23.5333333333 20.6045352989 114% => OK
Discourse Markers: 4.53333333333 5.45110844103 83% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 5.0 5.5376344086 90% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 11.0 11.8709677419 93% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 2.0 3.85842293907 52% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 2.0 4.88709677419 41% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.287252588915 0.236089414692 122% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.1226761102 0.076458572812 160% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0576554950664 0.0737576698707 78% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.197397629589 0.150856017488 131% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0238997498059 0.0645574589148 37% => Paragraphs are similar to each other. Some content may get duplicated or it is not exactly right on the topic.

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 12.3 11.7677419355 105% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 56.59 58.1214874552 97% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 6.10430107527 144% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 11.1 10.1575268817 109% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 10.04 10.9000537634 92% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.42 8.01818996416 93% => OK
difficult_words: 59.0 86.8835125448 68% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 13.0 10.002688172 130% => OK
gunning_fog: 11.2 10.0537634409 111% => OK
text_standard: 13.0 10.247311828 127% => OK
What are above readability scores?

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We are expecting: No. of Words: 350 while No. of Different Words: 200
Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:

para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.

So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:

reasons == advantages or

reasons == disadvantages

for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.

or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.


Rates: 66.6666666667 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 20.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.