TPO-13 - Independent Writing Task Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? The extended family (grandparents, cousins, aunts, and uncles) is less important now than it was in the past.Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.

Nowadays, people have tend to spend more time for themselves and their improvements to succeed in life. Our life is based on communicating with each other to produce every single part of our life. However, there are some reasons that avoids a closer relations ships with extended familiy. On the one hand, besides from all the benefits of technology, it gives an impact of staying close to people and have face to face communications. On the other hand, people have become more selfish because of social media. In addition, respect is not valuable in most of the countries anymore.

First of all, technology seems to be more utilized rather than its obstacles to most of people. Nevertheless, people in twenty first century more tend to communicate with their cell phones rather than meeting. In these days, a person can almost do any kind of interview through a mobile phone. For example, I used to see my cousins face more than now. We used to play games and hang out together while we were younger. With a technology of a mobile phone, we started to feel that we do not need to spend time and money for a meeting. We can communicate with each other by using our mobile phones in a cheap and easiy way. So, this situation avoids us to see our faces.

Second, in some cases, people became more selfish than in the past. I personally think that since internet and social media has been involving and spreading out to many countries, people became more selfish in their personal living. For eaxmple, I do see many of bad influenced events that going on among extended families. And this knowladge that I am acquiring from the social media news affect me to think twice about my extended family. I realized some kind of same situations that I had with my cousins and uncles. Social media convinces me to stay a little far away from my extended family.

Lastly, Being respectful to elderly people is declining by some reasons. To give an example from my country, in Turkey, people were more adapted to be respect old people's because of their ages and experiments about life. Our extended family that who is at an older age would deserve more respect in the past. But I osberve every day, there is a small amount of a respect between youngers to olders. For example, I use bus to get to work every day. One day, my grandfather would like to come and see my work place. We took a bus early in the morning and there was no empty space for sitting. I saw one of my cousin were sitting and he just oversaw me. I did not realize what the reason that he was doing it first. But as soon as an elderly person asked him to have his place, he refused him to not to giv his place. I was enourmiously shocked iwth his selfish behavior. This made me realize why the people do not care about their extended family much.

To sum up, being part of a family, I believe, requires much more than only communicating with phones, internet or being careless. In my case, communicating with each other is the reason why we were created for. Who really needs more than a happy relationship with their close extended families.

Votes
Average: 7 (1 vote)
Essay Categories

Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 23, Rule ID: HAVE_PART_AGREEMENT[1]
Message: Use past participle here: 'tended'.
Suggestion: tended
Nowadays, people have tend to spend more time for themselves and t...
^^^^
Line 3, column 81, Rule ID: MOST_SOME_OF_NNS[1]
Message: After 'most of', you should use 'the' ('most of the people') or simply say ''most people''.
Suggestion: most of the people; most people
...e utilized rather than its obstacles to most of people. Nevertheless, people in twenty first c...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 3, column 121, Rule ID: EN_COMPOUNDS
Message: This word is normally spelled with hyphen.
Suggestion: twenty-first
...most of people. Nevertheless, people in twenty first century more tend to communicate with t...
^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 3, column 134, Rule ID: CD_NN[1]
Message: Possible agreement error. The noun 'century' seems to be countable, so consider using: 'centuries'.
Suggestion: centuries
...e. Nevertheless, people in twenty first century more tend to communicate with their cel...
^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 129, Rule ID: PROGRESSIVE_VERBS[1]
Message: This verb is normally not used in the progressive form. Try a simple form instead.
...hat since internet and social media has been involving and spreading out to many countries, pe...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 9, column 212, Rule ID: SENTENCE_FRAGMENT[1]
Message: “Who” at the beginning of a sentence requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
... is the reason why we were created for. Who really needs more than a happy relation...
^^^

Transition Words or Phrases used:
besides, but, first, however, if, lastly, nevertheless, really, second, so, while, for example, in addition, kind of, first of all, in some cases, to sum up, on the other hand

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 20.0 15.1003584229 132% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 5.0 9.8082437276 51% => OK
Conjunction : 16.0 13.8261648746 116% => OK
Relative clauses : 10.0 11.0286738351 91% => OK
Pronoun: 68.0 43.0788530466 158% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 90.0 52.1666666667 173% => OK
Nominalization: 2.0 8.0752688172 25% => More nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2550.0 1977.66487455 129% => OK
No of words: 560.0 407.700716846 137% => Less content wanted.
Chars per words: 4.55357142857 4.8611393121 94% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.8645985582 4.48103885553 109% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.44936216187 2.67179642975 92% => OK
Unique words: 268.0 212.727598566 126% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.478571428571 0.524837075471 91% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 828.0 618.680645161 134% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.51630824373 99% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 20.0 9.59856630824 208% => Less pronouns wanted as sentence beginning.
Article: 1.0 3.08781362007 32% => OK
Subordination: 0.0 3.51792114695 0% => More adverbial clause wanted.
Conjunction: 3.0 1.86738351254 161% => OK
Preposition: 11.0 4.94265232975 223% => Less preposition wanted as sentence beginnings.

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 35.0 20.6003584229 170% => OK
Sentence length: 16.0 20.1344086022 79% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively short.
Sentence length SD: 27.5724500181 48.9658058833 56% => The essay contains lots of sentences with the similar length. More sentence varieties wanted.
Chars per sentence: 72.8571428571 100.406767564 73% => OK
Words per sentence: 16.0 20.6045352989 78% => OK
Discourse Markers: 5.0 5.45110844103 92% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 4.53405017921 110% => OK
Language errors: 6.0 5.5376344086 108% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 12.0 11.8709677419 101% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 12.0 3.85842293907 311% => Less negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 11.0 4.88709677419 225% => Less facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.111138829642 0.236089414692 47% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0323411977705 0.076458572812 42% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0314376327179 0.0737576698707 43% => Sentences are similar to each other.
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.0687675169011 0.150856017488 46% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.018873490663 0.0645574589148 29% => Paragraphs are similar to each other. Some content may get duplicated or it is not exactly right on the topic.

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 8.0 11.7677419355 68% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 63.7 58.1214874552 110% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 6.10430107527 51% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 8.4 10.1575268817 83% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 8.81 10.9000537634 81% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.22 8.01818996416 90% => OK
difficult_words: 99.0 86.8835125448 114% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 8.0 10.002688172 80% => OK
gunning_fog: 8.4 10.0537634409 84% => OK
text_standard: 8.0 10.247311828 78% => OK
What are above readability scores?

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Write the essay in 30 minutes.

Rates: 70.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 21.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.