TPO-21 - Independent Writing Task Do you agree or disagree with the following statement?For success in a future job, the ability to relate well to people is more important than studying hard in school. Use specific reasons and examples to support your ans

The most efficient way to succeed in future job is a controversial issue. Some people are inclined to the idea that the key for success in future jod is studying hard in school. Others think that the most important quality to sicced in future job is the ability to relate well with people. I firmly concur with the argument and think that having the ability to communicate well with people is crucial for outstanding job carrier.

The first aspect to point out is that without good communication skills people can not transfer their knowledge. An article in recent news paper says that about 80% of workers who are succeeding in their field are not having that bright school record, instead they having a strong ability to deal with the different types of coworkers and customers` personalities. Even though, good performance in school is very important in order to qualify for most of jobs, but it is not enough to get promotion in work environment.

Another significant point to take in consideration is that workers are more productive in a good work environment. People who are able to relate well with others are most likely to have less stressful work environment. As a result they will be more productive than their colleagues who are not. Because of this they will get more promotions and better chance to be appointed in the best positions. It`s true that Vast and deep knowledge is vital in the work, but in order for employee to explore their knowledge they have to have good relationships with their coworkers and with customers as well.

In conclusion, being able to relate with people is the key to success in a future work, not only to deal with coworkers and customers and also to be able to explore knowledge .

Votes
Average: 6 (1 vote)
Essay Categories

Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 3, column 135, Rule ID: NEWS_PAPER[1]
Message: Did you mean 'newspaper'? This word sequence is usually spelled together.
Suggestion: newspaper
...r their knowledge. An article in recent news paper says that about 80% of workers who are ...
^^^^^^^^^^
Line 3, column 453, Rule ID: MOST_SOME_OF_NNS[1]
Message: After 'most of', you should use 'the' ('most of the jobs') or simply say ''most jobs''.
Suggestion: most of the jobs; most jobs
... very important in order to qualify for most of jobs, but it is not enough to get promotion ...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 3, column 460, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...mportant in order to qualify for most of jobs, but it is not enough to get promot...
^^
Line 5, column 220, Rule ID: SENTENCE_FRAGMENT[1]
Message: “As” at the beginning of a sentence requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
...o have less stressful work environment. As a result they will be more productive t...
^^
Line 7, column 175, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Don't put a space before the full stop
Suggestion: .
...and also to be able to explore knowledge .
^^

Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, first, if, so, well, in conclusion, as a result

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 21.0 15.1003584229 139% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 3.0 9.8082437276 31% => OK
Conjunction : 9.0 13.8261648746 65% => OK
Relative clauses : 11.0 11.0286738351 100% => OK
Pronoun: 20.0 43.0788530466 46% => OK
Preposition: 52.0 52.1666666667 100% => OK
Nominalization: 8.0 8.0752688172 99% => OK

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1446.0 1977.66487455 73% => OK
No of words: 300.0 407.700716846 74% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 4.82 4.8611393121 99% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.16179145029 4.48103885553 93% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.73299787432 2.67179642975 102% => OK
Unique words: 141.0 212.727598566 66% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.47 0.524837075471 90% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 447.3 618.680645161 72% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.51630824373 99% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 1.0 9.59856630824 10% => OK
Interrogative: 0.0 0.994623655914 0% => OK
Article: 3.0 3.08781362007 97% => OK
Subordination: 3.0 3.51792114695 85% => OK
Conjunction: 2.0 1.86738351254 107% => OK
Preposition: 2.0 4.94265232975 40% => More preposition wanted as sentence beginning.

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 13.0 20.6003584229 63% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 23.0 20.1344086022 114% => OK
Sentence length SD: 50.7991753183 48.9658058833 104% => OK
Chars per sentence: 111.230769231 100.406767564 111% => OK
Words per sentence: 23.0769230769 20.6045352989 112% => OK
Discourse Markers: 4.46153846154 5.45110844103 82% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 5.0 5.5376344086 90% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 10.0 11.8709677419 84% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 2.0 3.85842293907 52% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 1.0 4.88709677419 20% => More facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.235026978222 0.236089414692 100% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0950232941536 0.076458572812 124% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0655256787918 0.0737576698707 89% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.155372090678 0.150856017488 103% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0868126599798 0.0645574589148 134% => OK

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 12.8 11.7677419355 109% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 56.59 58.1214874552 97% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 6.10430107527 144% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 11.1 10.1575268817 109% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 10.97 10.9000537634 101% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.83 8.01818996416 98% => OK
difficult_words: 58.0 86.8835125448 67% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 8.0 10.002688172 80% => OK
gunning_fog: 11.2 10.0537634409 111% => OK
text_standard: 11.0 10.247311828 107% => OK
What are above readability scores?

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We are expecting: No. of Words: 350 while No. of Different Words: 200
Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:

para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.

So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:

reasons == advantages or

reasons == disadvantages

for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.

or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.


Rates: 60.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 18.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.