TPO-26 - Independent Writing Task Do you agree or disagree with the following statement?It is better for children to choose jobs that are similar to their parents’ jobs than to choose jobs that are very different from their parents’ job.Use specific r

Career choice is one of the most important decisions that everybody has to do. It is beneficial for children to continue their parent's jobs. I would like to elaborate my answer with two reasons.

First, when kids work as their parents' apprentices, they could learn those vocations more easily, and it would benefit them better since they would surpass their competitors as they began the career since their childhood. For instance, in Iran; my country, we have a popular singer known as Iraj. He sang during 1950 until 1970. His work was so energetic that everyone liked that, or at least heard from it. Many years later when his son grew up, it was a great opportunity to use his father's experience to build up his sound and publish his own work. Khajeh Amiri; Iraj's son, grasp the opportunity and with his natural talent, and his father's guidance, he became even more celebrated, and his work is considered to be more advanced than Iraj's songs. On the other hand, it is noticeable that Iraj's reputation was a great asset for his son's work in early stages. That was a simple example of a musician singer that was successful and passed on his knowledge and popularity through next generation.

Second, in some vocations, take architecture for instance, it was conventional that early architects in Iran, took apprentices and past on their knowledge and their shops to them. For example, last year I went to Khouf; an eastern city in Khorasaan province in Iran. I saw some ancient windmills that are a magnificent evident of ancient Persian engineering. These windmills are very interesting since they rotate around a vertical pivot. I read an article that says this kind of windmills are much more efficient and those that circulate around horizontal pivot. Anyway, I visited those amazing windmills, and there is a very old man who tends and maintains the mills. He claims that he learned this work from his father, and his father learned it from his father, and this goes about 600 hundred years ago that masters teach their apprentices how to work and maintain the windmills. It was essential that they learn these techniques when they were children since there was a lot of information to comprehend. That's another evidence that learning parents' career from childhood could benefit kids significantly.

To summarize, in today's fast-paced world, it is critical that parents teach kids their jobs so that children could excel their rivals in their future lives.

Votes
Average: 7.6 (1 vote)
Essay Categories

Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 5, column 1012, Rule ID: EN_CONTRACTION_SPELLING
Message: Possible spelling mistake found
Suggestion: That's
...was a lot of information to comprehend. Thats another evidence that learning parents ...
^^^^^

Transition Words or Phrases used:
anyway, first, if, second, so, as to, at least, for example, for instance, kind of, on the other hand

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 19.0 15.1003584229 126% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 6.0 9.8082437276 61% => OK
Conjunction : 16.0 13.8261648746 116% => OK
Relative clauses : 20.0 11.0286738351 181% => OK
Pronoun: 76.0 43.0788530466 176% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 48.0 52.1666666667 92% => OK
Nominalization: 8.0 8.0752688172 99% => OK

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2059.0 1977.66487455 104% => OK
No of words: 416.0 407.700716846 102% => OK
Chars per words: 4.94951923077 4.8611393121 102% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.51620172871 4.48103885553 101% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.59439822227 2.67179642975 97% => OK
Unique words: 230.0 212.727598566 108% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.552884615385 0.524837075471 105% => OK
syllable_count: 622.8 618.680645161 101% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.51630824373 99% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 19.0 9.59856630824 198% => OK
Article: 1.0 3.08781362007 32% => OK
Subordination: 1.0 3.51792114695 28% => OK
Conjunction: 7.0 1.86738351254 375% => Less conjunction wanted as sentence beginning.
Preposition: 5.0 4.94265232975 101% => OK

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 21.0 20.6003584229 102% => OK
Sentence length: 19.0 20.1344086022 94% => OK
Sentence length SD: 51.7766439785 48.9658058833 106% => OK
Chars per sentence: 98.0476190476 100.406767564 98% => OK
Words per sentence: 19.8095238095 20.6045352989 96% => OK
Discourse Markers: 4.80952380952 5.45110844103 88% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 1.0 5.5376344086 18% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 16.0 11.8709677419 135% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 0.0 3.85842293907 0% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 5.0 4.88709677419 102% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.142271448809 0.236089414692 60% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0437645949219 0.076458572812 57% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0601421781993 0.0737576698707 82% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.123759678339 0.150856017488 82% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0655124870789 0.0645574589148 101% => OK

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 11.8 11.7677419355 100% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 60.65 58.1214874552 104% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 6.10430107527 144% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 9.5 10.1575268817 94% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 11.43 10.9000537634 105% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.22 8.01818996416 103% => OK
difficult_words: 96.0 86.8835125448 110% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 7.0 10.002688172 70% => OK
gunning_fog: 9.6 10.0537634409 95% => OK
text_standard: 10.0 10.247311828 98% => OK
What are above readability scores?

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Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:

para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.

So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:

reasons == advantages or

reasons == disadvantages

for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.

or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.


Rates: 76.6666666667 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 23.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.