TPO-27 - Independent Writing Task Do you agree or disagree with the following statement?If people have the opportunity to get a secure job, they should take it right away rather than wait for a job that would be more satisfying.Use specific reasons and ex

There is no shortage of debate about the job selection and job satisfaction. In current situation employment is a bigger issue for many countries, and they are dealing with by providing lots of opportunity for the young adults. In my opinion, it is better to get a secure job rather that waiting for a satisfying job. I feel this way because of two reasons, which I will explain in the essay.
First of all, in the physical world, we need money to buy food, to pay our rent and to pay the bills of the university. Without money we cannot afford a proper health care and medicine. For the money we need a job so we can secure our lives,therefore, in the current situation, we cannot wait for the satisfactory job. My own experience is a compelling example of this. For example, when I was studying in the first degree, I had financial problem and I was unable to pay my bill. Then I decided to work in the cafeteria, which was not my dream job and in this way, I paid all my bills. It helped me a lot, therefore, I strongly believe that it is better to have a job rather than waiting for a suitable job.

Secondly, with money, we can afford a better education, which will open a new avenue for a dream job. To fulfil these criteria, firstly we need a job so we can continue studies. For instance, my friend started a job when he was in master degree and in the meanwhile he studied business and as a result of it he got his dream job. During this period he was away from all financial as well as other problems.
In conclusion, in the current situation, it is better to have a job and rather than waiting for a good job. It provides us a financial help and solves our other crisis.

Votes
Average: 6 (1 vote)
Essay Categories

Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 2, column 241, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma
Suggestion: , therefore
...we need a job so we can secure our lives,therefore, in the current situation, we cannot wa...
^^^^^^^^^^

Transition Words or Phrases used:
first, firstly, second, secondly, so, then, therefore, well, while, for example, for instance, i feel, in conclusion, as a result, as well as, first of all, in my opinion

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 12.0 15.1003584229 79% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 10.0 9.8082437276 102% => OK
Conjunction : 10.0 13.8261648746 72% => OK
Relative clauses : 7.0 11.0286738351 63% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 46.0 43.0788530466 107% => OK
Preposition: 35.0 52.1666666667 67% => OK
Nominalization: 9.0 8.0752688172 111% => OK

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1371.0 1977.66487455 69% => OK
No of words: 319.0 407.700716846 78% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 4.29780564263 4.8611393121 88% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.22617688928 4.48103885553 94% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.60660145103 2.67179642975 98% => OK
Unique words: 155.0 212.727598566 73% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.485893416928 0.524837075471 93% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 432.9 618.680645161 70% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.4 1.51630824373 92% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 13.0 9.59856630824 135% => OK
Article: 0.0 3.08781362007 0% => OK
Subordination: 1.0 3.51792114695 28% => OK
Conjunction: 1.0 1.86738351254 54% => OK
Preposition: 11.0 4.94265232975 223% => Less preposition wanted as sentence beginnings.

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 17.0 20.6003584229 83% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 18.0 20.1344086022 89% => OK
Sentence length SD: 29.6166978059 48.9658058833 60% => OK
Chars per sentence: 80.6470588235 100.406767564 80% => OK
Words per sentence: 18.7647058824 20.6045352989 91% => OK
Discourse Markers: 10.0 5.45110844103 183% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 1.0 5.5376344086 18% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 9.0 11.8709677419 76% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 6.0 3.85842293907 156% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 2.0 4.88709677419 41% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.224750086061 0.236089414692 95% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0849133913843 0.076458572812 111% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0870801774455 0.0737576698707 118% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.17243162889 0.150856017488 114% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0511942301785 0.0645574589148 79% => OK

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 8.2 11.7677419355 70% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 70.13 58.1214874552 121% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 6.10430107527 51% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 7.9 10.1575268817 78% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 7.66 10.9000537634 70% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.45 8.01818996416 93% => OK
difficult_words: 59.0 86.8835125448 68% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 8.0 10.002688172 80% => OK
gunning_fog: 9.2 10.0537634409 92% => OK
text_standard: 8.0 10.247311828 78% => OK
What are above readability scores?

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We are expecting: No. of Words: 350 while No. of Different Words: 200
Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:

para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.

So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:

reasons == advantages or

reasons == disadvantages

for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.

or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.


Rates: 60.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 18.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.