These days among many factors that have vital impact on children’s future, the most important factor is their education. Although there are a large number of families think it is a good idea to encourage young children with money, as reward, others decide that it is not appropriate method. I strongly believe it is not suitable to offering offspring money, since not only is not it healthy but it also is not wealthy.
The first reason why offerings young kids is not a good idea is that, it threats their health. To begin with, it is obvious that children do not understand the value of the money, they receive as reward, and maybe they spend it in dangerous ways, such as gambling, and buy addictive drugs. In add addition, they do not attention to choosing friend. These days in many cases there are some bad guys that encourage their friends to gather money from them by different strategies, and since school children are not mature enough, in stead of reward them by money, the best way is spending money by parents to purchase better gifts for them, such as pen, pencil, teacher, and necessary school instruments to achieve high marks in school.
The second point which deserves some words is, it is not wealthy. The first reason is that, young students can not manage their money. For example, I have one cousin, named john, his parents all the time send money for him to spend on his studies. One day his father decides to follow him in order to see what he is doing with that moneys. Unfortunately, he collides with bad perspective. John, his lovely son, starts a big ceremony with friends that even he does not see them, and it was a terrible experience. Furthermore, it is not logical for children to save their moneys on banks. Nonetheless, it is better parents open an account for their children, and send the moneys, as gifts, motivating their emotions by giving them credit cards. In this way the money saved and they study their lessons better than before.
Since these disadvantages I state above, parents should not offer their young children money as rewards to study their lessons better.
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 146, Rule ID: LARGE_NUMBER_OF[1]
Message: Specify a number, remove phrase, or simply use 'many' or 'numerous'
Suggestion: many; numerous
... is their education. Although there are a large number of families think it is a good idea to enc...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 1, column 338, Rule ID: IT_IS_JJ_TO_VBG[1]
Message: Did you mean 'offer'?
Suggestion: offer
... strongly believe it is not suitable to offering offspring money, since not only is not ...
^^^^^^^^
Line 4, column 1, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...ealthy but it also is not wealthy. The first reason why offerings young kid...
^^^^
Line 4, column 346, Rule ID: AFFORD_VB[1]
Message: This verb is used with the infinitive: 'to friend'
Suggestion: to friend
...tion, they do not attention to choosing friend. These days in many cases there are som...
^^^^^^
Line 4, column 532, Rule ID: IN_STEAD_OF[1]
Message: Did you mean 'instead of'?
Suggestion: instead of
... school children are not mature enough, in stead of reward them by money, the best way is s...
^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 7, column 1, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...s to achieve high marks in school. The second point which deserves some wor...
^^^^
Line 10, column 136, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
... rewards to study their lessons better.
^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, first, furthermore, if, may, nonetheless, second, so, for example, such as, in many cases, to begin with
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 20.0 15.1003584229 132% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 2.0 9.8082437276 20% => OK
Conjunction : 8.0 13.8261648746 58% => More conjunction wanted.
Relative clauses : 9.0 11.0286738351 82% => OK
Pronoun: 55.0 43.0788530466 128% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 41.0 52.1666666667 79% => OK
Nominalization: 4.0 8.0752688172 50% => More nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1764.0 1977.66487455 89% => OK
No of words: 369.0 407.700716846 91% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 4.78048780488 4.8611393121 98% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.38284983912 4.48103885553 98% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.4513449732 2.67179642975 92% => OK
Unique words: 197.0 212.727598566 93% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.533875338753 0.524837075471 102% => OK
syllable_count: 523.8 618.680645161 85% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.4 1.51630824373 92% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 14.0 9.59856630824 146% => OK
Article: 5.0 3.08781362007 162% => OK
Subordination: 5.0 3.51792114695 142% => OK
Conjunction: 6.0 1.86738351254 321% => Less conjunction wanted as sentence beginning.
Preposition: 6.0 4.94265232975 121% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 17.0 20.6003584229 83% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 21.0 20.1344086022 104% => OK
Sentence length SD: 76.4189418356 48.9658058833 156% => OK
Chars per sentence: 103.764705882 100.406767564 103% => OK
Words per sentence: 21.7058823529 20.6045352989 105% => OK
Discourse Markers: 6.76470588235 5.45110844103 124% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 7.0 5.5376344086 126% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 9.0 11.8709677419 76% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 5.0 3.85842293907 130% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 3.0 4.88709677419 61% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.274930544412 0.236089414692 116% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0852036219998 0.076458572812 111% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0543189833698 0.0737576698707 74% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.16999927376 0.150856017488 113% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0581322033979 0.0645574589148 90% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 11.9 11.7677419355 101% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 67.08 58.1214874552 115% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 6.10430107527 51% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 9.1 10.1575268817 90% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 10.44 10.9000537634 96% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.63 8.01818996416 95% => OK
difficult_words: 69.0 86.8835125448 79% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 10.5 10.002688172 105% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.4 10.0537634409 103% => OK
text_standard: 11.0 10.247311828 107% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.
So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:
reasons == advantages or
reasons == disadvantages
for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
Rates: 70.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 21.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.