TPO 46 : Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? The opinions of celebrities, such as famous entertainers and athletes, are more important to younger people than they are to older people. Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.
Celebrities, such as famous entertainers and athletes, are popular among others in a society and they have their own ideas which sometimes share those ideas to their society. In my point of view, I agree that opinions of celebrities are more important to younger people than to older people. My reasons are elaborated as follows.
First of all, young people are usually youthful and immature. Therefore, they need to learn some experiences from other people to avoid of some problems which can be happened in a wrong way. On the other hand, older people are more mature and thus their need to opinions is less. For example, statistics demonstrate the number of younger people who have kid napped are more that those are older.
Secondly, younger people usually hear some points of celebrities who they are interested in them. For instance, a celebrity might say that I never drink alcohol in my life due to its harmful to my body. Accordingly, his/her advocator may follow him/her and no longer drink alcohol.
Finally, younger people are more susceptible to pay attention to advises of a celebrity than elderly people. In fact, younger people are in a situation that should learn life style through funny activities, and in this regards, celebrities are one of the best subjects.
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 5, column 176, Rule ID: IN_A_X_MANNER[1]
Message: Consider replacing "in a wrong way" with adverb for "wrong"; eg, "in a hasty manner" with "hastily".
... of some problems which can be happened in a wrong way. On the other hand, older people are mo...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 13, column 215, Rule ID: THIS_NNS[1]
Message: Did you mean 'these'?
Suggestion: these
... style through funny activities, and in this regards, celebrities are one of the bes...
^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
accordingly, finally, first, if, may, second, secondly, so, therefore, thus, as to, for example, for instance, in fact, such as, first of all, on the other hand
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 13.0 15.1003584229 86% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 6.0 9.8082437276 61% => OK
Conjunction : 6.0 13.8261648746 43% => More conjunction wanted.
Relative clauses : 8.0 11.0286738351 73% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 25.0 43.0788530466 58% => OK
Preposition: 30.0 52.1666666667 58% => More preposition wanted.
Nominalization: 3.0 8.0752688172 37% => More nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1081.0 1977.66487455 55% => More number of characters wanted.
No of words: 215.0 407.700716846 53% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 5.02790697674 4.8611393121 103% => OK
Fourth root words length: 3.82921379641 4.48103885553 85% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.62486343614 2.67179642975 98% => OK
Unique words: 124.0 212.727598566 58% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.576744186047 0.524837075471 110% => OK
syllable_count: 345.6 618.680645161 56% => syllable counts are too short.
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.51630824373 106% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 4.0 9.59856630824 42% => OK
Article: 1.0 3.08781362007 32% => OK
Subordination: 0.0 3.51792114695 0% => More adverbial clause wanted.
Conjunction: 1.0 1.86738351254 54% => OK
Preposition: 3.0 4.94265232975 61% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 12.0 20.6003584229 58% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 17.0 20.1344086022 84% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively short.
Sentence length SD: 36.7253318569 48.9658058833 75% => OK
Chars per sentence: 90.0833333333 100.406767564 90% => OK
Words per sentence: 17.9166666667 20.6045352989 87% => OK
Discourse Markers: 13.3333333333 5.45110844103 245% => Less transition words/phrases wanted.
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 2.0 5.5376344086 36% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 7.0 11.8709677419 59% => More positive sentences wanted.
Sentences with negative sentiment : 3.0 3.85842293907 78% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 2.0 4.88709677419 41% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.252382996189 0.236089414692 107% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0929905113454 0.076458572812 122% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0794035748006 0.0737576698707 108% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.151642636757 0.150856017488 101% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0841744357294 0.0645574589148 130% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 11.2 11.7677419355 95% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 54.22 58.1214874552 93% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 6.10430107527 144% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 9.9 10.1575268817 97% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 11.6 10.9000537634 106% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.3 8.01818996416 104% => OK
difficult_words: 52.0 86.8835125448 60% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 8.5 10.002688172 85% => OK
gunning_fog: 8.8 10.0537634409 88% => OK
text_standard: 9.0 10.247311828 88% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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We are expecting: No. of Words: 350 while No. of Different Words: 200
Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.
So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:
reasons == advantages or
reasons == disadvantages
for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
More content wanted.
Minimum 250 words wanted.
Rates: 60.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 18.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.