TPO-46 - Independent Writing Task Do you agree or disagree with the following statement?The opinions of celebrities, such as famous entertainers and athletes, are more important to younger people than they are to older people.Use specific reasons and exam

The transition period from a child to an adult is a critical interval in every individual’s life. Based on the criteria of defining success and happiness, youngsters usually consider celebrities as successful role models. I personally believe that due to many reasons such as being more involved in the social media, saturated with the fun, luxurious lifestyle of famous people and the appealing vision of fame and wealth, in comparison to the older people, youngsters usually pay more attention to celebrities. The following article will further elaborate this opinion based on my personal perspective and experiences.
Despite older people, who have reached stability and independence to some extent, youngsters usually seek role models to achieve their ambitions of a cheerful favorable life. Many young people believe that in order to be successful they should have a guide through their journey of life. Therefore, since TV or social media only portrays the happy side of the lifestyle of famous people, such as entertainers and athletes, younger people, unconsciously, come to the belief that these people are successful and make significant contributions to the society. For instance, as I was growing up in 1990’s, Michael Jackson, the king of pop music, was an idol or hero for many young people. Many youngsters and adolescents, even in my country Iran, were trying to imitate his way of dressing, acting and particularly dancing. However, this behavior was absurd from the adult’s point of view, especially parents. A decade later, when was facing child abuse charges and many young people were still worshiping him and could not believe any of those assertions against him. This indeed is due to the blind love and respect toward famous people in the society, which makes them supernatural heroes for their mostly young fans.
This, in fact, originates from different preferences in defining an influential, important character from the youngster’s perspective in comparison to the older generations. For younger people, wealth, welfare, and fame could be decisive key factors. Back to the case of the king of pop, living in Neverland Valley, having personal airplanes and such things were a lifetime dream for many young fans and a demonstration of a happy successful life that everyone envies. Even when Michael Jackson opened up his childhood obsessions in a documentary about his life, many could not believe how devastated he was in his personal life, because this vision was not compatible with people’s view of a person having this much wealth and welfare. In fact, worshiping a famous person such as M.J. was even far beyond this, that ludicrous rhombus about the immortality of this pop star began to spread among his fans. Thus, in my opinion, the way younger people define an important person is an essential factor, which makes them consider famous people as role models or even heroes.
By way of conclusion, based on the arguments explored above and my personal experience, I believe that younger people, in comparison to the older people, pay more attention to famous people and usually consider them as important influential people in the society and their lives.

Votes
Average: 7.3 (1 vote)
Essay Categories

Transition Words or Phrases used:
but, however, if, so, still, therefore, thus, for instance, in fact, such as, in my opinion

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 17.0 15.1003584229 113% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 5.0 9.8082437276 51% => OK
Conjunction : 22.0 13.8261648746 159% => OK
Relative clauses : 11.0 11.0286738351 100% => OK
Pronoun: 38.0 43.0788530466 88% => OK
Preposition: 72.0 52.1666666667 138% => OK
Nominalization: 7.0 8.0752688172 87% => OK

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2706.0 1977.66487455 137% => OK
No of words: 516.0 407.700716846 127% => OK
Chars per words: 5.24418604651 4.8611393121 108% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.76609204519 4.48103885553 106% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.87902583111 2.67179642975 108% => OK
Unique words: 254.0 212.727598566 119% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.492248062016 0.524837075471 94% => OK
syllable_count: 848.7 618.680645161 137% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.51630824373 106% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 5.0 9.59856630824 52% => OK
Interrogative: 2.0 0.994623655914 201% => OK
Article: 5.0 3.08781362007 162% => OK
Subordination: 4.0 3.51792114695 114% => OK
Conjunction: 1.0 1.86738351254 54% => OK
Preposition: 8.0 4.94265232975 162% => OK

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 19.0 20.6003584229 92% => OK
Sentence length: 27.0 20.1344086022 134% => OK
Sentence length SD: 65.2729194737 48.9658058833 133% => OK
Chars per sentence: 142.421052632 100.406767564 142% => OK
Words per sentence: 27.1578947368 20.6045352989 132% => OK
Discourse Markers: 4.78947368421 5.45110844103 88% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 0.0 5.5376344086 0% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 13.0 11.8709677419 110% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 3.0 3.85842293907 78% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 3.0 4.88709677419 61% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.176690441563 0.236089414692 75% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0570757947953 0.076458572812 75% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0585911217486 0.0737576698707 79% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.131731921379 0.150856017488 87% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0284649140121 0.0645574589148 44% => Paragraphs are similar to each other. Some content may get duplicated or it is not exactly right on the topic.

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 16.8 11.7677419355 143% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 44.07 58.1214874552 76% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 6.10430107527 144% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 13.8 10.1575268817 136% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 13.41 10.9000537634 123% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 9.05 8.01818996416 113% => OK
difficult_words: 133.0 86.8835125448 153% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 12.0 10.002688172 120% => OK
gunning_fog: 12.8 10.0537634409 127% => OK
text_standard: 14.0 10.247311828 137% => OK
What are above readability scores?

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Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:

para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.

So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:

reasons == advantages or

reasons == disadvantages

for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.

or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.


Rates: 73.3333333333 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 22.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.