TPO26 – Independent: A/D? It is better for children to choose jobs that are similar to their parent's jobs than to choose jobs that very different from their parent's job.

Nowadays, many children has already plan what they are goint to do when they are grown up. Some of them want to have similiar jobs with their parents. However, I believe that it is better for the children to choose the carrer based on their own regradless their parent's job.

To begin with, it will give freedom for the children to follow their passion. Maybe some of the children have big idea such as make tech company or develop social startup. Eventually because it based from their dream, they will study hard and overcame any struggle to achieve their dream. For example, when there is a child who has passion to become a doctor instead an engineer like their parent. Eventhough that he know that he has to study harder in medicine than in engineer. He still want to become a doctor because he like interacting with people and curing them. Also, it will make the children can learn from many places beside their parent.

Next, it will prevent some nepotism because it is likely that the parents want the company to accept their children as employee in that company. So choose jobs differently will decrease that conditon chance. It because today many parents want their children choose similiar jobs to them because they know that it will be easier to get the children accepted as employee.

In summary, children will have more advantages if they choose different jobs with their parent's job instead choose similiar job.

Votes
Average: 6 (1 vote)
Essay Categories

Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 37, Rule ID: HAVE_PART_AGREEMENT[2]
Message: Possible agreement error -- use past participle here: 'planned'.
Suggestion: planned
Nowadays, many children has already plan what they are goint to do when they are...
^^^^
Line 3, column 85, Rule ID: SOME_OF_THE[1]
Message: Simply use 'some'.
Suggestion: some
...children to follow their passion. Maybe some of the children have big idea such as make tec...
^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 3, column 490, Rule ID: HE_VERB_AGR[3]
Message: The pronoun 'He' must be used with a third-person verb: 'wants'.
Suggestion: wants
... in medicine than in engineer. He still want to become a doctor because he like inte...
^^^^

Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, however, if, may, so, still, as to, for example, in summary, such as, to begin with

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 6.0 15.1003584229 40% => More to be verbs wanted.
Auxiliary verbs: 8.0 9.8082437276 82% => OK
Conjunction : 3.0 13.8261648746 22% => More conjunction wanted.
Relative clauses : 10.0 11.0286738351 91% => OK
Pronoun: 39.0 43.0788530466 91% => OK
Preposition: 29.0 52.1666666667 56% => More preposition wanted.
Nominalization: 0.0 8.0752688172 0% => More nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1189.0 1977.66487455 60% => OK
No of words: 247.0 407.700716846 61% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 4.81376518219 4.8611393121 99% => OK
Fourth root words length: 3.96437052324 4.48103885553 88% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.21000720573 2.67179642975 83% => OK
Unique words: 128.0 212.727598566 60% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.518218623482 0.524837075471 99% => OK
syllable_count: 360.9 618.680645161 58% => syllable counts are too short.
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.51630824373 99% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 7.0 9.59856630824 73% => OK
Article: 0.0 3.08781362007 0% => OK
Subordination: 1.0 3.51792114695 28% => OK
Conjunction: 0.0 1.86738351254 0% => OK
Preposition: 2.0 4.94265232975 40% => More preposition wanted as sentence beginning.

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 14.0 20.6003584229 68% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 17.0 20.1344086022 84% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively short.
Sentence length SD: 29.2878048034 48.9658058833 60% => The essay contains lots of sentences with the similar length. More sentence varieties wanted.
Chars per sentence: 84.9285714286 100.406767564 85% => OK
Words per sentence: 17.6428571429 20.6045352989 86% => OK
Discourse Markers: 6.35714285714 5.45110844103 117% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 3.0 5.5376344086 54% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 10.0 11.8709677419 84% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 0.0 3.85842293907 0% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 4.0 4.88709677419 82% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.412636808203 0.236089414692 175% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.164262388972 0.076458572812 215% => Sentence topic similarity is high.
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.149022496757 0.0737576698707 202% => The coherence between sentences is low.
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.329983802029 0.150856017488 219% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.12443031114 0.0645574589148 193% => OK

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 10.0 11.7677419355 85% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 62.68 58.1214874552 108% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 6.10430107527 51% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 8.7 10.1575268817 86% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 10.32 10.9000537634 95% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 6.78 8.01818996416 85% => OK
difficult_words: 36.0 86.8835125448 41% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 7.5 10.002688172 75% => OK
gunning_fog: 8.8 10.0537634409 88% => OK
text_standard: 9.0 10.247311828 88% => OK
What are above readability scores?

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We are expecting: No. of Words: 350 while No. of Different Words: 200
Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:

para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.

So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:

reasons == advantages or

reasons == disadvantages

for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.

or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.

Minimum 250 words wanted.

Rates: 60.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 18.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.