TOEFL integrated writing: communal online encyclopedia
The reading and the lecture discuss several points to compare communal online encyclopedias with the traditional, printed encyclopedias. The reading passage presents negative points about the online encyclopedias. However, the lecturer casts doubt on each of the points and states several advantages of the online encylopedias.
To begin with, the reading passage states that contributers of online encyclopedias often lack academic credential, therefore the informatoion in the online encyclopedias would be inaccurate. However, the lecturer points out that chances of making errors are impossible to avoid. Nobody can find or create a perfect article. Furthermore, the benefit of the online encyclopedias is that it is easy to correct errors online, but it can take decays to correct errors in the printed encyclopedias. This disputes the point made in the reading passage.
In addition, the reading passage states that the online encylopedias are easy to get corrupted by hackers. However, the lecturer sates that there are many protective ways to save the online encyclopedias from hackers. One of this way is the crucial fact about this encyclopedias. The crucial fact does not allow anyone to make any changes to the original formet. Moreover, the team of special editors always supervise the changes in the article, and if they find something malicious, they eliminate this king of changes. This directly challenges the assertion stated in the reading passage.
Last but not least, the reading passage states that online encyclopedias allow to put information in depth, which is the reason a reader lose interest in reading the aricle. However, the lecturer argues that this diversity in the aricle is the most important advantage of the online encyclopedias. This encyclopedias provide enough space to write all the information in detail about articles. This creates great variety and reflect diversity about articles. On the other hand, the tradition encyclopedias has limited space and only contain the information that a group of experts has decided. This information cannot reflect all the interests, a person can have. Thus, this appears to be a contradiction to the information asserted in the reading passage.
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 5, column 261, Rule ID: THIS_NNS[1]
Message: Did you mean 'these'?
Suggestion: these
...e of this way is the crucial fact about this encyclopedias. The crucial fact does no...
^^^^
Line 7, column 80, Rule ID: ALLOW_TO[1]
Message: Did you mean 'putting'? Or maybe you should add a pronoun? In active voice, 'allow' + 'to' takes an object, usually a pronoun.
Suggestion: putting
... states that online encyclopedias allow to put information in depth, which is the reas...
^^^^^^
Line 7, column 299, Rule ID: THIS_NNS[1]
Message: Did you mean 'these'?
Suggestion: These
... advantage of the online encyclopedias. This encyclopedias provide enough space to w...
^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
but, furthermore, however, if, moreover, so, therefore, thus, in addition, to begin with, on the other hand
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 10.0 10.4613686534 96% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 5.0 5.04856512141 99% => OK
Conjunction : 8.0 7.30242825607 110% => OK
Relative clauses : 9.0 12.0772626932 75% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 22.0 22.412803532 98% => OK
Preposition: 45.0 30.3222958057 148% => OK
Nominalization: 9.0 5.01324503311 180% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1889.0 1373.03311258 138% => OK
No of words: 345.0 270.72406181 127% => OK
Chars per words: 5.47536231884 5.08290768461 108% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.3097767484 4.04702891845 106% => OK
Word Length SD: 3.01543463546 2.5805825403 117% => OK
Unique words: 164.0 145.348785872 113% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.475362318841 0.540411800872 88% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 608.4 419.366225166 145% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.8 1.55342163355 116% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 7.0 3.25607064018 215% => Less pronouns wanted as sentence beginning.
Article: 14.0 8.23620309051 170% => OK
Subordination: 0.0 1.25165562914 0% => More adverbial clause wanted.
Conjunction: 2.0 1.51434878587 132% => OK
Preposition: 3.0 2.5761589404 116% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 21.0 13.0662251656 161% => OK
Sentence length: 16.0 21.2450331126 75% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively short.
Sentence length SD: 41.1913294709 49.2860985944 84% => OK
Chars per sentence: 89.9523809524 110.228320801 82% => OK
Words per sentence: 16.4285714286 21.698381199 76% => OK
Discourse Markers: 5.09523809524 7.06452816374 72% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.09492273731 98% => OK
Language errors: 3.0 4.19205298013 72% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 11.0 4.33554083885 254% => Less positive sentences wanted.
Sentences with negative sentiment : 6.0 4.45695364238 135% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 4.0 4.27373068433 94% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.197035380421 0.272083759551 72% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0599658714667 0.0996497079465 60% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.068559445024 0.0662205650399 104% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.131897681984 0.162205337803 81% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0398770371452 0.0443174109184 90% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 12.6 13.3589403974 94% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 38.31 53.8541721854 71% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 5.55761589404 158% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 11.9 11.0289183223 108% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 14.21 12.2367328918 116% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.0 8.42419426049 95% => OK
difficult_words: 78.0 63.6247240618 123% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 8.0 10.7273730684 75% => OK
gunning_fog: 8.4 10.498013245 80% => OK
text_standard: 8.0 11.2008830022 71% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Write the essay in 20 minutes.
Rates: 73.3333333333 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 22.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.