TPO46-Integrated-In the United States, medical information about patients traditionally has been recorded and stored on paper forms. However, there are efforts to persuade doctors to adopt electronic medical record systems in which information about patie

Essay topics:

TPO46-Integrated-In the United States, medical information about patients traditionally has been recorded and stored on paper forms. However, there are efforts to persuade doctors to adopt electronic medical record systems in which information about patients is stored in electronic databases rather than on paper. It is argued that storing patients' medical records in electronic databases has several advantages over traditional paper-based record keeping.

First, the use of electronic records can help reduce costs by saving money on storing and transferring medical records. While paper records require a significant amount of storage space, electronic medical records take up virtually no space. Moreover, by having patients' records computerized in databases, doctors can easily access the records from almost anywhere and can easily duplicate and transfer them when necessary. This costs much less than copying, faxing, or transporting paper records from one location to another.

Second, electronic medical records are crucial to reducing the chances of medical errors. Illegible handwriting, improper transcription of data, and nonstandard organization of paper records have caused errors that in some cases have had serious consequences for the patients' health. In contrast, electronic records are associated with standardization of forms and legible computer fonts and thus minimize the possibility of human error.

Third, electronic medical records can greatly aid medical research by making it possible to gather large amounts of data from patient records. It is often impractical, impossible, or prohibitively expensive to manually go through thousands of patients’ paper records housed in doctors' offices. However, with the existence of electronic medical records, it would be simple to draw out the needed information from the medical databases because the databases are already formatted for data collection. Once in the electronic system, the records could be accessed from any research location.

The reading passage mentions several advantages for electronic medical records over traditional regular paper forms. However, the lecturer casts doubt on the claims made in the article. She believes that the benefits of electronic storage is uncertain.

To begin with, the author posits that electronic medical records could help reduce expenses spent on storage, copying and transportation of paper-based records. The lecturer, on the other hand, brings up the fact that doctors would have to keep the paper records as a backup. Also, they might need the signed forms for legal purposes. Consequently, medical professionals would not save any money by switching to electronic records, neither would they save space.

Secondly, the article argues that electronic records could prevent medical errors due to illegible handwriting or improper transcription of data. Nevertheless, the lecturer challenges this point of view. She indicates that physicians still use pen and paper to take notes while examining their patients then staff, at a later time, enter the handwritten data into the computer system. Thus, electronic records would not guard against misinterpretations of the handwriting by staff members.

Lastly, the writer holds that electronic records would facilitate medical research as it would be easy to draw out the required information from huge databases, which are designed to help in locating information. Conversely, The professor in the lecture contends that strict privacy laws would make it difficult to obtain patients' information. According to the lecture, patients are allowed by law to block the use of their health records for any purpose other than their own medical treatment. Hence, researchers would have to go through complicated procedures to access patient information for research reasons.

Votes
Average: 9 (1 vote)
Essay Categories

Comments

Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 5, column 464, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...records, neither would they save space. Secondly, the article argues that electr...
^^^^^^^
Line 13, column 615, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...tient information for research reasons.
^^^^^

Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, consequently, conversely, hence, however, if, lastly, nevertheless, second, secondly, so, still, then, thus, while, to begin with, on the other hand

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 4.0 10.4613686534 38% => More to be verbs wanted.
Auxiliary verbs: 12.0 5.04856512141 238% => Less auxiliary verb wanted.
Conjunction : 3.0 7.30242825607 41% => More conjunction wanted.
Relative clauses : 8.0 12.0772626932 66% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 17.0 22.412803532 76% => OK
Preposition: 36.0 30.3222958057 119% => OK
Nominalization: 7.0 5.01324503311 140% => OK

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1565.0 1373.03311258 114% => OK
No of words: 276.0 270.72406181 102% => OK
Chars per words: 5.67028985507 5.08290768461 112% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.07593519647 4.04702891845 101% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.91457526963 2.5805825403 113% => OK
Unique words: 174.0 145.348785872 120% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.630434782609 0.540411800872 117% => OK
syllable_count: 468.9 419.366225166 112% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.7 1.55342163355 109% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 3.0 3.25607064018 92% => OK
Article: 8.0 8.23620309051 97% => OK
Subordination: 0.0 1.25165562914 0% => More adverbial clause wanted.
Conjunction: 0.0 1.51434878587 0% => OK
Preposition: 4.0 2.5761589404 155% => OK

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 15.0 13.0662251656 115% => OK
Sentence length: 18.0 21.2450331126 85% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively short.
Sentence length SD: 44.0313019971 49.2860985944 89% => OK
Chars per sentence: 104.333333333 110.228320801 95% => OK
Words per sentence: 18.4 21.698381199 85% => OK
Discourse Markers: 10.2666666667 7.06452816374 145% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.09492273731 98% => OK
Language errors: 2.0 4.19205298013 48% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 7.0 4.33554083885 161% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 5.0 4.45695364238 112% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 3.0 4.27373068433 70% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.544502921091 0.272083759551 200% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.161663908524 0.0996497079465 162% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.114232780251 0.0662205650399 173% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.316216736697 0.162205337803 195% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0289622090942 0.0443174109184 65% => OK

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 14.5 13.3589403974 109% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 44.75 53.8541721854 83% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 5.55761589404 158% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 11.5 11.0289183223 104% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 15.61 12.2367328918 128% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 9.39 8.42419426049 111% => OK
difficult_words: 85.0 63.6247240618 134% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 7.5 10.7273730684 70% => OK
gunning_fog: 9.2 10.498013245 88% => OK
text_standard: 9.0 11.2008830022 80% => OK
What are above readability scores?

---------------------

Rates: 90.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 27.0 Out of 30
---------------------
Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.