TPO 46 Writing IntegratedIn the United States, medical information about patients traditionally has been recorded and stored on paper forms. However, there are efforts to persuade doctors to adopt electronic medical record systems in which information abo

Essay topics:

TPO 46 Writing Integrated

In the United States, medical information about patients traditionally has been recorded and stored on paper forms. However, there are efforts to persuade doctors to adopt electronic medical record systems in which information about patients is stored in electronic databases rather than on paper. It is argued that storing patients' medical records in electronic databases has several advantages over traditional paper-based record keeping.

The passage suggests that medical information should be stored in electronic form rather than on paper. Three arguments were made by the author to support the suggestion.

First, the use of electronic records can help in cutting back on costs. electronic databases can take way less space than paper and the cost of saving the records electronically can be substantially less than copying, faxing, or transporting the records from one location to another. However, as stated in the lecture, no drastic saving can be made, doctors still use papers for various reasons. it can be used to store back up records for emergencies.

Furthermore, the author claims that using electronic storage can eliminate errors made by illegible handwriting or improper transcription of data. The lecture states that it cannot help in preventing these errors. Usually when doctors examine patients, they use a pen and paper to take notes and prescribe medication, it is their assistants who take the notes from paper and enter it to the computer.

Finally, regarding research, the author presumes that storing medical data electronically can help in aiding medical research. The author states that it can be difficult to access the data due to regulated restriction imposed by privacy laws. patients under these laws have the rights to block any use of their personal medical records other than their own medical treatment.

Votes
Average: 7.5 (1 vote)
Essay Categories

Comments

Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 5, column 73, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: Electronic
...ords can help in cutting back on costs. electronic databases can take way less space than ...
^^^^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 397, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: It
...s still use papers for various reasons. it can be used to store back up records fo...
^^
Line 13, column 244, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: Patients
...ed restriction imposed by privacy laws. patients under these laws have the rights to blo...
^^^^^^^^

Transition Words or Phrases used:
finally, first, furthermore, however, if, regarding, so, still

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 7.0 10.4613686534 67% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 10.0 5.04856512141 198% => OK
Conjunction : 6.0 7.30242825607 82% => OK
Relative clauses : 7.0 12.0772626932 58% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 16.0 22.412803532 71% => OK
Preposition: 27.0 30.3222958057 89% => OK
Nominalization: 7.0 5.01324503311 140% => OK

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1193.0 1373.03311258 87% => OK
No of words: 226.0 270.72406181 83% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 5.27876106195 5.08290768461 104% => OK
Fourth root words length: 3.87727950738 4.04702891845 96% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.79382997738 2.5805825403 108% => OK
Unique words: 131.0 145.348785872 90% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.579646017699 0.540411800872 107% => OK
syllable_count: 369.9 419.366225166 88% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.55342163355 103% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 3.0 3.25607064018 92% => OK
Article: 6.0 8.23620309051 73% => OK
Subordination: 1.0 1.25165562914 80% => OK
Conjunction: 1.0 1.51434878587 66% => OK
Preposition: 1.0 2.5761589404 39% => More preposition wanted as sentence beginning.

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 12.0 13.0662251656 92% => OK
Sentence length: 18.0 21.2450331126 85% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively short.
Sentence length SD: 46.5476905979 49.2860985944 94% => OK
Chars per sentence: 99.4166666667 110.228320801 90% => OK
Words per sentence: 18.8333333333 21.698381199 87% => OK
Discourse Markers: 5.16666666667 7.06452816374 73% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.09492273731 98% => OK
Language errors: 3.0 4.19205298013 72% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 2.0 4.33554083885 46% => More positive sentences wanted.
Sentences with negative sentiment : 5.0 4.45695364238 112% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 5.0 4.27373068433 117% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.524739618323 0.272083759551 193% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.180537376932 0.0996497079465 181% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.124275943179 0.0662205650399 188% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.286343584686 0.162205337803 177% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.112746806404 0.0443174109184 254% => More connections among paragraphs wanted.

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 12.9 13.3589403974 97% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 53.21 53.8541721854 99% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 5.55761589404 158% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 10.3 11.0289183223 93% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 13.34 12.2367328918 109% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 9.21 8.42419426049 109% => OK
difficult_words: 67.0 63.6247240618 105% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 8.5 10.7273730684 79% => OK
gunning_fog: 9.2 10.498013245 88% => OK
text_standard: 9.0 11.2008830022 80% => OK
What are above readability scores?

---------------------

Rates: 75.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 22.5 Out of 30
---------------------
Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.