"All students should be required to take the driver's education course at Centerville High School. In the past two years several accidents in and around Centerville have involved teenage drivers. Since a number of parents in Centerville have complained that they are too busy to teach their teenagers to drive, some other instruction is necessary to ensure that these teenagers are safe drivers. Although there are two driving schools in Centerville, parents on a tight budget cannot afford to pay for driving instruction. Therefore an effective and mandatory program sponsored by the high school is the only solution to this serious problem."
The letter to the school board in centerville expresses a grave concern about the accident happening in the area and involvement of teenagers in that. Stating this it suggests that the centerville highschool should start an effective and mandatory driving program. He provides further reasons like lot of teenagers are involved in the accidents, Complaints from the parents that they are too busy to teach their children to drive and finally the unaffordable cost of the two driving schools in the city. Firstly the suggestion seems fine but after carefully examining it we can see that it is flawed and ignored lot of facts.
It is mentioned in the letter that in the past two years several accidents in and around centerville has involved teenage drivers. Stating this he should have provided the total no of accidents and the ones which involve the teenage drivers. He should have mentioned about the severity of the accidents which involve teenage drivers. Without an exact number it would be naive to assume that teenagers are involved in several accidents. again it is not mentioned about the driving status of the teenage driver who were involved in the accidents happend around centerville area. It may be true that lot of them were already learned drivers but still commited blunders. So without any knowledge about the history of those drivers involved again it can't be assumed that all those who were involved were not educated enough for driving.
Accidents are not a sole responsiblity of a single person or single side. Yes, sometimes it involved mistake of only one party but most of the time both the drivers on each side are responsible for accident. so it may be possible that in all those accidents mentioned the teenage drivers had nothing to do with those mistakes and it happened because of the carelessness of the other driver. So the teenage drivers cannot be blamed for the accident solely. So without having more information about the accidents, blaming a particular group of drivers seems partial.
Finally the suggestion which says that the centerville highschool should start a effective and mandatory program about the driving seems a hasty one. Teaching driving to one or two students is completly diffrent from teaching driving to the whole school. It will increase more economic burden on the school. More funds will be used to make sure the program is more effective, trained driving instructors should be hired and this will again increase the burden on school. To cope with such pressure the school might impose some fee hike in the academic fees of students which will then burden the parents, who in the first place are complaining about the unaffordble pay for the driving school. Again the letter dosen't mention the total number of parents complaining. It may be true that the parents are complaining about the thing that they are too busy to teach their children how to drive. But they are not suggesting the school to start teaching driving.
So the suggestion to the school about starting a driving course is hasty and have a lot of loopholes. To make his point more strong the arguer should have mentiond about the Total number of accidents, The exact number of teenagers involved in that, More information about the accident and their causes, The number of parents complaining etc. Again he should have mentioned the ways in which the school can start such program without burdening themselves economically. Then the Suggestion will be plausible.
Comments
Essay evaluation report
Sentence: The letter to the school board in centerville expresses a grave concern about the accident happening in the area and involvement of teenagers in that.
Error: centerville Suggestion: centerpiece
Sentence: Stating this it suggests that the centerville highschool should start an effective and mandatory driving program.
Error: highschool Suggestion: high school
Error: centerville Suggestion: centerpiece
Sentence: He provides further reasons like lot of teenagers are involved in the accidents, Complaints from the parents that they are too busy to teach their children to drive and finally the unaffordable cost of the two driving schools in the city.
Error: unaffordable Suggestion: No alternate word
Sentence: Without an exact number it would be naive to assume that teenagers are involved in several accidents. again it is not mentioned about the driving status of the teenage driver who were involved in the accidents happend around centerville area.
Error: happend Suggestion: No alternate word
Sentence: Accidents are not a sole responsiblity of a single person or single side.
Error: responsiblity Suggestion: responsibility
Sentence: Teaching driving to one or two students is completly diffrent from teaching driving to the whole school.
Error: completly Suggestion: completely
Error: diffrent Suggestion: different
Sentence: To cope with such pressure the school might impose some fee hike in the academic fees of students which will then burden the parents, who in the first place are complaining about the unaffordble pay for the driving school.
Error: unaffordble Suggestion: unfavorable
Sentence: To make his point more strong the arguer should have mentiond about the Total number of accidents, The exact number of teenagers involved in that, More information about the accident and their causes, The number of parents complaining etc. Again he should have mentioned the ways in which the school can start such program without burdening themselves economically.
Error: mentiond Suggestion: mention
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Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 4.0 out of 6
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 8 2
No. of Sentences: 25 15
No. of Words: 585 350
No. of Characters: 2871 1500
No. of Different Words: 228 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.918 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.908 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.536 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 213 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 165 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 100 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 63 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 23.4 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 13.455 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.52 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.321 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.504 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.16 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 1, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
The letter to the school board in center...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 3, column 1, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
... is flawed and ignored lot of facts. It is mentioned in the letter that in th...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 3, column 196, Rule ID: NOW[2]
Message: Did you mean 'now' (=at this moment) instead of 'no' (negation)?
Suggestion: now
... this he should have provided the total no of accidents and the ones which involve...
^^
Line 3, column 454, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: Again
...gers are involved in several accidents. again it is not mentioned about the driving s...
^^^^^
Line 3, column 763, Rule ID: CANT[1]
Message: Did you mean 'can't' or 'cannot'?
Suggestion: can't; cannot
...tory of those drivers involved again it cant be assumed that all those who were invo...
^^^^
Line 3, column 763, Rule ID: IT_VBZ[1]
Message: Did you mean 'cants'?
Suggestion: cants
...tory of those drivers involved again it cant be assumed that all those who were invo...
^^^^
Line 5, column 1, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...ere not educated enough for driving. Accidents are not a sole responsiblity o...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 226, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: So
...each side are responsible for accident. so it may be possible that in all those ac...
^^
Line 7, column 1, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...ular group of drivers seems partial. Finally the suggestion which says that t...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 7, column 18, Rule ID: SENT_START_CONJUNCTIVE_LINKING_ADVERB_COMMA[1]
Message: Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Suggestion: Finally,
...vers seems partial. Finally the suggestion which says that the cent...
^^^^^^^
Line 7, column 97, Rule ID: EN_A_VS_AN
Message: Use 'an' instead of 'a' if the following word starts with a vowel sound, e.g. 'an article', 'an hour'
Suggestion: an
...the centerville highschool should start a effective and mandatory program about t...
^
Line 9, column 1, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...he school to start teaching driving. So the suggestion to the school about st...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 9, column 524, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
... Then the Suggestion will be plausible.
^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
but, finally, first, firstly, if, may, so, still, then, in the first place
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 28.0 19.6327345309 143% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 20.0 12.9520958084 154% => OK
Conjunction : 17.0 11.1786427146 152% => OK
Relative clauses : 21.0 13.6137724551 154% => OK
Pronoun: 47.0 28.8173652695 163% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 78.0 55.5748502994 140% => OK
Nominalization: 8.0 16.3942115768 49% => More nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2920.0 2260.96107784 129% => OK
No of words: 584.0 441.139720559 132% => OK
Chars per words: 5.0 5.12650576532 98% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.91590194646 4.56307096286 108% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.5867025751 2.78398813304 93% => OK
Unique words: 230.0 204.123752495 113% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.393835616438 0.468620217663 84% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 900.9 705.55239521 128% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.59920159681 94% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 6.0 4.96107784431 121% => OK
Article: 3.0 8.76447105788 34% => OK
Subordination: 0.0 2.70958083832 0% => More adverbial clause wanted.
Conjunction: 1.0 1.67365269461 60% => OK
Preposition: 3.0 4.22255489022 71% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 28.0 19.7664670659 142% => OK
Sentence length: 20.0 22.8473053892 88% => OK
Sentence length SD: 51.1380684111 57.8364921388 88% => OK
Chars per sentence: 104.285714286 119.503703932 87% => OK
Words per sentence: 20.8571428571 23.324526521 89% => OK
Discourse Markers: 2.64285714286 5.70786347227 46% => More transition words/phrases wanted.
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 13.0 5.25449101796 247% => Less language errors wanted.
Sentences with positive sentiment : 6.0 8.20758483034 73% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 17.0 6.88822355289 247% => Less negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 5.0 4.67664670659 107% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.324873952257 0.218282227539 149% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.101644992567 0.0743258471296 137% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0828131753702 0.0701772020484 118% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.193623139286 0.128457276422 151% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0838043587332 0.0628817314937 133% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 12.6 14.3799401198 88% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 59.64 48.3550499002 123% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 7.1628742515 43% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 9.9 12.197005988 81% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 11.72 12.5979740519 93% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.31 8.32208582834 88% => OK
difficult_words: 99.0 98.500998004 101% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 14.5 12.3882235529 117% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.0 11.1389221557 90% => OK
text_standard: 10.0 11.9071856287 84% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Rates: 50.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.