Arctic deer live on islands in Canada's arctic regions. They search for food by moving over ice from island to island during the year. Their habitat is limited to areas warm enough to sustain the plants on which they feed and cold enough, at least some of the year, for the ice to cover the sea separating the islands, allowing the deer to travel over it. Unfortunately, according to reports from local hunters, the deer populations are declining. Since these reports coincide with recent global warming trends that have caused the sea ice to melt, we can conclude that the purported decline in deer populations is the result of the deer's being unable to follow their age-old migration patterns across the frozen sea.
The above given prompt starts by describing the arctic deer, the regions of the world it inhabits, and the common trend followed by an arctic deer to search for food. According to a few local hunters, it has been reported that the arctic deer population is depleting. The inability of the deers to follow their migration pattern because of environmental changes occurring due to global warming has been attributed as the main cause for their declining population. The evidences and assumptions stated above provide a convincing argument when it is read the first time, but close scrutiny unearths a few competing possibilities that could cast doubt on the reliability of the conclusion that has been drawn.
Firstly, the reports related to deers declining was received from local hunters. As the prefix suggests "local", these hunters are confined to a area and the observation of dears declining is possibly what they perceive in their particular area. It is possible that elsewhere in the arctic region, the number of deers has maintained a steady number. Therefore, it is highly probable that the reports received form local hunters is not accurately depicting the true picture.
Secondly, the global warming trends occurring across the globe does not provide a conclusive evidence of whether the same phenomena of ice melting is occurring in the arctic region as well. The arctic region has its own demographic structure, unique to itself. It can be possible that the rate and the time at which the ice melts is not the same as, observed elsewhere in the world. It can be possible that the ice in the arctic region is melting at a considerably reduced rate which provides deers with enough time to migrate from one island to another and procure food. This would again suggest that the number of deers in the arctic region has not declined. On the contrary, if the number of deers is actually going downhill, it cannot be conclusively stated that global warming is the cause of this problem.
Moreover, it can be highly possible that the real reason for the decline in dear population, if it is the case, is due to an increase in the number of hunters in the arctic region. This would define the reason for attributing the decline of deer population to global warming. This would enable these hunters to get acquitted and continue with their malpractices.
The above prompt cannot categorically convince a reader that global warming is the reason for the decline in dear population. There are several other assumptions and possibilities which when considered, prove the conclusion to dubious and inconclusive.
Comments
e-rater score report
Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 3.5 out of 6
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 19 15
No. of Words: 435 350
No. of Characters: 2136 1500
No. of Different Words: 189 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.567 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.91 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.642 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 164 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 113 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 77 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 48 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 22.895 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 8.309 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.316 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.339 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.564 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.098 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 574, Rule ID: CLOSE_SCRUTINY[1]
Message: Use simply 'scrutiny'.
Suggestion: scrutiny
...ent when it is read the first time, but close scrutiny unearths a few competing possibilities ...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 3, column 154, Rule ID: EN_A_VS_AN
Message: Use 'an' instead of 'a' if the following word starts with a vowel sound, e.g. 'an article', 'an hour'
Suggestion: an
...al', these hunters are confined to a area and the observation of dears decli...
^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
actually, but, first, firstly, if, moreover, second, secondly, so, therefore, well, on the contrary
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 24.0 19.6327345309 122% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 9.0 12.9520958084 69% => OK
Conjunction : 9.0 11.1786427146 81% => OK
Relative clauses : 16.0 13.6137724551 118% => OK
Pronoun: 34.0 28.8173652695 118% => OK
Preposition: 50.0 55.5748502994 90% => OK
Nominalization: 9.0 16.3942115768 55% => More nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2202.0 2260.96107784 97% => OK
No of words: 435.0 441.139720559 99% => OK
Chars per words: 5.06206896552 5.12650576532 99% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.56690854021 4.56307096286 100% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.78947685661 2.78398813304 100% => OK
Unique words: 198.0 204.123752495 97% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.455172413793 0.468620217663 97% => OK
syllable_count: 688.5 705.55239521 98% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.59920159681 100% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 11.0 4.96107784431 222% => Less pronouns wanted as sentence beginning.
Article: 9.0 8.76447105788 103% => OK
Subordination: 3.0 2.70958083832 111% => OK
Conjunction: 2.0 1.67365269461 119% => OK
Preposition: 2.0 4.22255489022 47% => More preposition wanted as sentence beginning.
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 19.0 19.7664670659 96% => OK
Sentence length: 22.0 22.8473053892 96% => OK
Sentence length SD: 46.8775147063 57.8364921388 81% => OK
Chars per sentence: 115.894736842 119.503703932 97% => OK
Words per sentence: 22.8947368421 23.324526521 98% => OK
Discourse Markers: 5.21052631579 5.70786347227 91% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 2.0 5.25449101796 38% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 9.0 8.20758483034 110% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 4.0 6.88822355289 58% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 6.0 4.67664670659 128% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.2412478298 0.218282227539 111% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0755314059115 0.0743258471296 102% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.062000466827 0.0701772020484 88% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.121288745333 0.128457276422 94% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0627718905343 0.0628817314937 100% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 13.8 14.3799401198 96% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 49.15 48.3550499002 102% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.1628742515 123% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 11.9 12.197005988 98% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 12.36 12.5979740519 98% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.43 8.32208582834 101% => OK
difficult_words: 102.0 98.500998004 104% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 14.5 12.3882235529 117% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.8 11.1389221557 97% => OK
text_standard: 12.0 11.9071856287 101% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Rates: 58.33 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.5 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.